Category: ADHD

Practice Good Elf-I-Mean-Self Management This Week

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More.

More, more, more, more, more, more.

This time of year, there is just More.

More events to attend, more pretty things to see, more fun to be had, more snacks and yummy things to eat, more service projects,  more items on the to-do lists, more stress and struggles.   More fun, sure, but also so many more expectations  for our time and energy and efforts.

But – wait!  We were already busy, even before there was More!  And now we are living our regular lives while trying to be great little Elves, bringing Christmas to our friends and family!  Aghhhh!!!!

Chances are, with this busy Christmas Season,  you are feeling a little maxed out, a little overwhelmed.  Chances are,  you are wearing your Elf-I-Mean-Self out.

If we are going to manage all those other things this week, first we need to manage our Elf-I-Mean-Self better.  This week, in the midst of all the MORE that you have… might I gently suggest that you spend a little time taking care of you?    (and I will try, too, I promise!)

Try these:

  • Grab a cup of hot cocoa, and take a few minutes to plan your day.
  • Collect all the stuff you need to take with you today into a tote, add a snack or two and a bottle of water, and go put it in the car right now while you are thinking about it.
  • Take a few more minutes, and look ahead at your week, and start smoothing out the bumps now!
  • Now, act!  I have to say, nothing saps my energy quicker than the mental nagging of those tasks that need to be completed.  Once you’ve made your plan for the day and week, implement it!
  • Embrace more short cuts.  Get more take-out? You bet.  Gift Cards and Gift Bags?  Yes, please. Send your Christmas Cards out the week after Christmas?  Go ahead.
  • Sing more Christmas carols.
  • Cut your Elf-I-Mean-Self some slack.
  • Take more deep breaths.
  • Drink more water.
  • Eat more actual food, and at regular intervals.
  • Take your vitamins.
  • Get more rest.
  • Accept more help.

And now, take care of your inner-Elf, wrap up this blog and go do something for You!

Three Words: The Power of “Not Right Now”

(Click here to hear / see me talk about this in a FB Live Post)

Last week I offered ideas to help you find motivators and get organized.  Yet, this week I am suggesting you occasionally say “Not Right Now”.

Hmmm….. Are you wondering what changed my mind?  Maybe the organizer is letting you off the hook this week and you get to goof off?  Uh, no, nice try.  “Find your Motivators” and “Saying ‘Not Right Now’” are both tools to move you along the path to getting things done and making your life better.

Time Management expert Steven Covey uses the Eisenhower Box, via Dwight D. Eisenhower, a grid to illustrate the basis for my Not Right Now Suggestion.  He suggests there are 4 types of tasks, categorized by Importance and Urgency.

The grid reads:

1.  Important, Urgent               2.  Important, Non Urgent
3.  Non-Important, Urgent     4.  Non-Important, Non Urgent

My “Not Right Now” strategy focuses on taking care of the (#1) Important and Urgent things first, and safely keeping ideas that are important but not urgent.

Important and urgent tasks (#1) for me today were to meet a client deadline for publication, submit an ad for an upcoming charity event and follow up with an upcoming presentation host.  As a self-employed entrepreneur, important and urgent tasks almost always have to come first.  There is no one else to do the work, and my business and clients have to be my top professional priorities.

(#3) Non-important, Urgent tasks included responding to emails, and taking care of some filing so I could re-claim my work space.  And these I did take care of, just to get them out of the way.

Next are the Non-urgent tasks, both important (#2) and non-important (#4), and that is where the Not Right Now tool comes into play.  I start a typical day with 2 or 3 Important and Urgent things that have to get done.  As I work, I get ideas, great and sometimes not-so-great.  They are all important, but they are rarely urgent.  I want to respect and collect the ideas that come to me, but I don’t want to lose my focus on the current task.  I jot them down, and get back to work.

Two professional organizers whom I really respect (Elizabeth Hagen and Barbara Hemphill) recommend keeping a pile of blank index cards close at hand as you work.  As an idea or task pop into your head, jot it down on a card, a new card for each idea.  When you are done with your current Important and Urgent task and can take a break, review the cards, act on the quick easy ones and sort the others into piles for when and how you need to act on them.

I use a notebook in the same way.  When I take a break from a project, I look at the ideas listed and put them where they will be most useful.  Perhaps one of my Outlook to-do lists, or add it to my strategic planning file.  If possible, I make the idea into an action item and attach it to a date and time, sometime in the future.  The idea is important, but it is for later, “Not Right Now”.

Not Right Now can be more global, too: I am willing to step up for leadership in my professional network, but not this year.  “Keep me on the list for the next cycle, and I am your girl.  But not right now” was my actual response.

“Not Right Now” has saved me recently, too.  I’ve gotten emails that I might react strongly to, but used “Not Right Now” to hold off on responding and finish my work.  By the time I could respond, I collected my thoughts and cooled down, and responded more reasonably.  Or I wait to act on an idea, and someone else acts first (woo hoo!).

Collect and safely keep ideas and inspirations, but cut yourself some slack and recognize the power of “Not Right Now”.  I would like to travel internationally, but not right now.  I want to learn to play the guitar, but not right now.   Perhaps I’ll get a tattoo, but not right now (Ok, I won’t get a tattoo, just wanted to see if you were all still paying attention).  I want to change the world, but Not Right Now.

I have been very busy lately, and busy is really great.  But now my professional tasks for the day are complete with the publication of my blog, and my “Not Right Now”s have become “Yes, Now”s  And yes, now, I really need to go clean my kitchen.

Let Your Brain Do Its Job! 5 Ways to Tame the Monkey Mind

(Original post 2011, edited in 2022!)

The tagline for my company is Organizing for Your Peace of Mind.  Early on, I realized that I am not just selling my time and expertise to my clients, I am providing Peace of Mind.  And I know this because I am constantly learning how to find it for myself, too. 

    I learned the term “Monkey Mind” years ago.  The term monkey mind comes from Buddhist monks to describe our racing thoughts, and it aptly describes my thought process some mornings!  (I like this mental image, too with the monkeys swinging from tree to tree.)   

    But our brain helps us survive and solve problems.  So, if given information, time and opportunity, our monkey mind / brain will come up with solutions for us.  Here are 5 Ways to Tame Your Monkey Mind, and Let Your Brain Do Its Job!

1.  Dump the Monkeys.  David Allen in Getting Things Done suggests writing down every idea running around your head on a piece of paper, a new piece for each idea. Then sort the papers (ideas) into categories –Kids, Work, Specific Work Projects, Personal achievements, Tasks, etc.  I like technology and achieve the same results with the Evernote where I keep my Daily Task List and also the specific ones, like Client Care, Classes or Tiger Scouts.  When the monkey mind overwhelms me, I dump all my ideas on one long un-edited list, then cut and paste the items into their various topic areas.  Next time I sit down to work, I open the Note topic I am looking for, and all those ideas are ready and waiting for me to take action.

2.  Take a Break:  If I lack focus and a clear next step to take, it is often because I need to take a break.  If I am with a client, we take a moment to talk and re-establish our goals for our appointment.  If I am at home, my favorite breaks are short and to the point, so I can get back to work in a timely manner.  I may water my plants, grab a cup of tea, eat an apple, get the mail, file or take out the trash.  I DO NOT check my email or Facebook in the middle of a work session, for if I do, I may never make it back to work!  But  5 minutes to walk around, take a breath, and re-direct are what I need to help me leave the frazzled behind and find new insights.

3.   Take A Nap:  My college roomies will attest, I made it through senior year with power naps.  Most of my upper level Management courses were evening classes, and I had a daytime job and responsibilities that kept me from sleeping in.  So 30 minutes at 4 pm helped me to stay alert and focused for those 3 hour classes!  A few weeks ago, I sent myself to my room for a 20 minute time-out, when my kids and my thoughts were all running around too fast to figure out what to do next.  I came back a calm, pleasant and focused person!

4.  Throw the monkeys off track, and do something completely unrelated.  My most relaxed times are while I am hiking, taking a shower, practicing my flute, or reading books with my youngest son.  During these activities the monkey mind moves to the back of my consciousness, and has a chance to solve pressing problems without my direct involvement.  Luckily, I keep a dry erase marker in the bathroom to jot notes on the mirror, or keep my smart phone with me to jot down task items or ideas as they come to me (except during reading time, that’s just for me and my little guy).  

5.  Do One Thing.  One thing, even if it is not the right or perfect thing, is still progress.  “We can’t do everything at once, but we can do something at once.”  – Calvin Coolidge

Please share any other suggestions for Calming the Monkey Mind, I would love to know what works for you!