Category: Organizing for Mom

Get Good At Transitions: Intros & Outros

I am going to start this article with the end in mind.

The last line is: “Get good at transitions with clear and consistent communications, a plan and focus, respect to timelines and occasional flexibility as needed.” And you will soon see why.

In addition to being an organizational coach and certified professional organizer, I am a liturgical musician. I have the supreme honor of enhancing worship with and for my community. In addition to enhancing worship, I also have the supreme honor of supporting my community in times of transitions, experiencing joys and sorrows at weddings, funerals, sacraments and holy days.

Recently, I had the true joy and privilege to sing at a wedding. The bride and groom were happy, the families were happy, the weather was perfect, there was a lovely feeling of celebration in the church. It was great. The benefit to planning for and singing for a wedding, as opposed to other sorts of liturgy, is that we have a lot of time to plan. I sat down with the bride and groom 7 months ago to review the order of the ceremony and fill in items like the readings. We also reviewed where in the ceremony there are opportunities for music, either instrumental or vocal or both, and discussed if they or their family members have specific requests and favorites. Since then, we texted, emailed and spoke, checking in again with the couple, their families and the deacon performing the ceremony.

Communication happened, everything was smooth sailing. The few hiccups that did occur were quickly managed.

Then it was the Saturday morning of the 2:30 pm Wedding. And everything was still fine, and continued to be – there is no cliff hanger here. I am not leading up to some big blow up. Everything was still sailing smoothly. But what occurred to me that day was, with months of planning for a 45 minute ceremony, that we needed to get VERY CLEAR on the 10 minutes before the ceremony began.

All the planning, all the rehearsing – and oh yes, I did rehearse – if my neighbors weren’t also singing the songs in their sleep after listening to me rehearse for the 2 weeks prior, I would be surprised. All the planning and all the rehearsing were for the ceremony itself, and we were super prepared. But success is often measured for such things as the ceremony, of course, but also how smoothly it begins and also ends.

It comes down to a few minutes, and then the moment. And… But?… And… we were ready. We had a clearly defined goal, laser focus on the goal, clear and consistent communications around the goal, and everyone did their part to prepare for the event. We were ready, AND I needed to nail those 10 minute leading up to the moment the bridal party stepped off.

It’s funny, because your perspective absolutely changes from six months out, reviewing the time line and checklists, hiring an accompanist, purchasing the sheet music, rehearsing, etc. Down to those last 600 seconds.

Shall we start playing the three minute and 47 second song at 2:24 as a prelude? But we have to make sure that the bride can hear it, because that was the one request she made to me via text the morning of the wedding. Or, as I thought about my chat that afternoon half an hour before the wedding with my friend, the mother of the bride, and how she mentioned that the only song that was specifically her choice was the song we were playing as the Mothers are seated. I had considered cutting it short (it also is 4 minutes), but she loves it, it was her only request, so guess what – yes, we played the entire song.

So, we had a goal and deadline and parameters, but the whole point of the day was to love and support the bride and groom and their families, so we made it all happen in that very short amount of time. We nailed that transition so the rest of the event could flow smoothly.

Similar thought process – soon after, my choir and I were warming up to sing at Mass and for whatever reason our Sunday morning rehearsal started late. We usually try to run through every song once in that Sunday morning rehearsal, but that day, we didn’t have as much time as we usually do. And when that happens, we focus on rehearsing the intros and outros. I don’t actually know if outro is a word, but if you talk to a musician, they know what intros and outros are. An intro is, for example, the first four measures of a song before the vocals begin. And the outro is how you plan to end the song – you vocally end with a whole note, then the instruments do another couple of measures, for example.

We know how the songs go, we aren’t worried about the middle. We just need to know we will start and end the same. Clear communications, a goal and focus, a clear plan. We need those intros and outros to be clean. If there is going to be a mistake, it is likely at those transition points and not in the middle of a verse. If we start messy, sometimes it throws us off and we miss other things in the song. And no one wants to finish rough because often, no matter how amazing the song was, people are going to remember the last 10 seconds and how you finished.

We focus on transitions, whether it is the few minutes before or after an event, or the first or last few seconds of a song, because those matter. Those are the most likely places to stumble, so we practice those even more than the rest.

This is not a music lesson, though it may sound like one. It’s a life lesson, with musical examples because I am me. Let’s look at how to apply solid intros and outros to life.

Our work or school days are predictable, for the most part. We know how to do our work and we know how to go to school. Our commute to and from work or school is relatively predictable, though sometimes we hit traffic or some other complication.

The more likely places we are to stumble in our day, the places that might stress us out or make us late, are the intros and outros, the transition for sleep to awake, from home to travel, the “leaving the house in a timely manner and well prepared” part.

Driving our car to school or work, and even doing our work isn’t where we stumble. Getting out of the house to drive, or leaving work on time to be ready for the rest of our day – that is where we stumble.

So the actual trip is no big deal, but if we don’t get our acts together, and so therefore don’t make it out the door in a timely manner and therefore we’re late for the rest of it, that is where we’re going to stumble. Right. Transitions. Transitions. Transitions are where we have the greatest opportunity and greatest incidents to stumble.

Let’s get really good at transitions.

Last week, I prepared to present at an event at a local community college. I love these events, it is great to go out and meet people! And I started my planning a few days before to make sure my transitions were solid. I made handouts ahead of time just in case my printer got cranky and I needed a Plan B. I purchased my promo materials months ago, and it’s all packed with my gear. I loaded everything into the car a day or two before, to make my day easier for the actual event. Anticipating the actual work, I had no worries about presenting or networking – those are easy. The potential transition that could slow down or mess up my day was changing out of client appointment clothes and into more snazzy presentation clothes, so I packed that bag ahead of time as well. And I knew how long the commute from my client appointment to the event should be, and allowing some cushion, I knew my hard stop time to get me where I needed to go.

Get good at transitions. We want to make sure we are as prepared as possible for those transitions. I’m never worried about my client appointments, but sometimes I’m worried about the commute, getting there, ending on time to get to my next appointment, and home again.

Let’s consider how we can practice those intros and outros even more. Keeping the analogy, when we practice intros and outros, we communicate ALOT beforehand about how we are going to start and finish, we imagine the song in our head, we set a tempo, we take a deep breath and then we begin.

“Get good at transitions with clear and consistent communications, a plan and focus, respect to timelines and occasional flexibility as needed.”

Bullet Journal: Ever Present and Indexing

Okay, next up on the list, let’s talk about Bullet Journal. Bullet Journaling. My bullet journal.

Now, this is a big deal for a lot of reasons, and I’m going to tell you why.

It’s September, and September is National Preparedness Month. I have shared a lot of information over the years about National Preparedness Month. We all benefit from that reminder that we need to have our ducks in a row, or at least know what and where are our ducks are. We need to be ready for life. And I will talk about National Preparedness Month in a couple of weeks, but that is not today’s topic.

One of the ways that I stay in a state of Ready, how I manage all the things that I manage – and there are a lot of those things – is using something called a Bullet Journal. I am going to reference now Ryder Carroll who created Bullet Journal, and also bulletjournal.com if you would like to know more.

And to give credit where credit is due, I need to give a nod to my dear friend Mark who introduced me to the idea many years ago. Mark has since passed, unfortunately, but I think of him kindly when I am working in my Bullet Journal.

I just started a new journal last week. Starting fresh is such a good feeling. A Bullet Journal is a tool. That’s all. It’s a very personalizeable tool. Mark and I taught Bullet Journaling classes over the years and it was good for us to teach it together because Bullet Journaling is so personal and individualized, it’s good to have two different people’s input.

There are many facets of a Bullet Journal that I love. Honestly, it’s a notebook. That’s it. It’s a notebook. How you use that notebook makes it a Bullet Journal. If you’d like to go to the Bullet Journal website and spend a lot of money on a very snazzy notebook – they are very pretty – Go for it. But before I get ahead of myself, let me tell you why I love my Bullet Journal.

A Bullet Journal is a tool, and the concept comes with rules and suggestions, a technique, with ways of doing things, and you can choose to use it or not, and you can choose to abide by the rules and suggestions or not. I find it very helpful, and there are two facets of Bullet Journaling that I will talk about today that can be applied to any other notebook or note taking device, as well.

One aspect I love about my Bullet Journal is that it is ever present, ever ready. As I am writing this article, it is physically at my right hand on my desk. And when I get ready to go in a few minutes, I will slip it into my backpack which is twelve inches away from it at present, and it will go with me and be ever present as I go about my day as well.

I love technology, I am a tech girl. I use my phone and iPad and laptop ALL DAY. But there are also times in my day that I that I need to write something down as opposed to entering it into my phone or laptop somehow. Maybe I need to scratch a 2 word reminder to run an errand while I sit at a stoplight, right? So I do. Because my Bullet Journal is ever present. And I don’t necessarily want to pick up my phone because well, it’s illegal and ill advised.

Whenever a thought strikes me, I can quickly jot it down, and I recognize there are many opportunities in my day where those thoughts to strike!

And this is why I am sharing. I know many people, clients and colleagues, who write down notes on whatever is handy. The back of mail envelopes, shopping bags, the margins of a book, on a newspaper, on their hands. (Yes, their hands, 25 years ago – I worked for the Internal Medicine Residency Program at the University of Illinois, Chicago and yes, our residents would sometimes jot down lab results on their hands because that’s what was available when they took a call from the lab about a patient.)

If I am already on a call, sometimes it’s just easier to write the customer service reference number or my family member’s hospital room number. And sometimes, I don’t want to get distracted by my screen so I will make a note to “look up jar salad recipes”, or write a really cool quote that I read in a devotion this morning.

One client in particular asks as we discover notes on note paper, receipts, envelopes, whatever – “What is wrong with me!?” Nothing’s wrong with her. But her notes and therefore her thoughts end up a hodgepodge, which makes it difficult to retain or review that information or get to what is really important. Whenever we’re working on her papers, we find notes all over the place but without context, they are difficult to process.

Which leads me to the second thing that I love most about my Bullet Journal and that is the Index. Which is just what it sounds like. Read any published material and it likely has an index. So you can find what you need when you need it.

On my Bullet Journal next to me, I have today’s date listed, and some notes below. Later today, I have a doctor’s appointment and I’m going to have some notes from that in my Bullet Journal. Later still, I will run a rehearsal for my choir and I will surely add more thoughts and tasks to the page.

In a couple of weeks, if I want to refer back to what we talked about today with my doctor, I’m going to be able to check the index and flip to the page from today.

My index pages, the first 4 pages of a Bullet Journal, will have three columns for page number, dates and then topics per page. So I can readily find information again if I need it.

And – you can do this with any notebook you already have, too! (I rocked a client’s world a few weeks ago with this concept – she was so excited to add an index to existing note books to make them make sense!!)

Yes, you can take an existing notebook, number the pages and if it is too late to add an index to the front, add it to the last 4 pages instead. Three columns for page number, date and topic. Sometimes my topic is “Life”, and sometimes it is “Dr. Appt, School Board Meeting regarding Finances, blog article ideas, etc.” Let’s say, on pages 13 and 14 are notes from the special board meeting regarding finances and in a month or two, I want to go back and look at that, I can flip to the index, see pages 13 and 14, and can flip to those pages with consistency, confidence.

I usually fill up a Bullet Journal in 4-5 months, but the notes and index still exist, so I can always go back and look for things if I need to.

A real life example, I had a client who was moving cross country. She called about apartments on the west coast and she had a notebook full of notes. But when it came time to actually travel, she was worried about being able to find the specific places and people that she had talked to, to reference while she sat in the office with the people. She had a notebook full of information, but it wasn’t as useful as it could be. I suggested she go back, and number the pages of the notebook, determine what date (approximately) she spoke with people at each apartment complex, and add that info to an index at the back of the notebook. She spoke to so and so on this date regarding these apartments, and this is how much a 1 bedroom costs, or a 2 bedroom, square footage, amenities, if there is a garage, how long is the waiting list, etc. And then, when she sat in the office on the west coast in-person, she could easily flip to that page easily and say, when we spoke on this day, you mentioned x, y and z” that conversation would be that much more fruitful. It really helped with the home search to be able to find that information again.

Another real world example, inspired by a conversation with my college student son. My son is taking a philosophy class this semester and his professor does not allow electronic note taking. I wish I had known about indexing when I was still a student, because, um, it’s so helpful. So, you know, on the back page of his notebook, on the first page, if he’s thinking of it, but definitely on the last couple pages, he could absolutely, you know, again, number the bottom of the notebook pages, and then pages one and two, or pages, you know, page one was first day of class. Page three, two, three and four were second day. And we talked broadly about this and this, right. And, uh, pages five through eight, we’re studying for the first quiz, um, on such and such a date regarding, um, such and such a topic, right. So you can index anything, and it’s so helpful.

Bullet Journaling for goal setting, time management and productivity!

This is definitely an article about my love for Bullet Journaling but I suggest that you consider how you could apply the idea of one ever present notebook and the idea of indexing to your current methods of note taking, if you have them. These ideas are specific to Bullet Journals, sure, but the two ideas that I’ve mentioned today can be used independently of bullet journaling as well. Give these ideas a try, and let me know what you think!

Peace-mck

“Activation of Prior Knowledge” (Sounds Cool, Right?)

In education, at least in this country because of summer vacation, there is the phenomenon of the “summer slide”. The summer slide refers to students forgetting stuff over summer vacation.

Students are in school for 9-ish months and they learn A LOT! And then, they take 2.5 months off for summer vacation, which is great, but they forget things in those 2.5 months.

Instead of receiving daily or weekly reminders and opportunities to use learned skills, they lose those reminders and opportunities so the skills get a little rusty. Without constantly accessing that information, it can feel like they are losing the information or skills.

Educators, and other people that are much smarter than me who know these things, would argue that the information isn’t lost. Students might forget they know it. It’s not lost. But they, and as we apply this idea to us, we, may need to remember how to retrieve it.

When we learn, we receive new information in our short term memory and then, through repetition and brain processes, our brain converts it to long term memory. I have talked about learning and repetition before, for example, in my “I Am Statements” article and episode.

We put in the reps, we put in the time, we build skills and work with the information, then the information gets cemented. It becomes part of us. But like when kids are out of school for a few months, they and we might get out of the retrieval habit.

Let’s face it, we all can get out of the habit of retrieving and using the information that we have learned.

When a student is starting let’s say 5th grade, the teacher can assume a few things. They can assume that because the student is starting fifth grade, the student has successfully completed learning all the things that you needed to learn to finish 4th grade, and all the grades before. We believe that we can make that assumption. There have been building blocks, some foundations laid.

It’s not as if your new fifth grader is going to review every moment of pre k, kindergarten, 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 4th grade. It doesn’t work that way. However, in the first couple of weeks in a school year, in many classes and subjects, what needs to happen is something called activation of prior knowledge.

Activation

Of

Prior

Knowledge.

Your student needs to be reminded that their brain knows stuff. They have used math, of course, all summer (because we really do use it every day), but they might not have needed all the facts since June, and now they need them again. They might not remember that they know the details of that particular science concept or that particular social studies concept or how to write a book report, etc.

Therefore, in the first few weeks of school, in addition to introducing new information, there is an activation of prior knowledge.

What does that mean to us as adults? Because guess what? Not just 10 year olds need to have their prior knowledge activated. We do, too. Very often when we decide we need to make a change, we think that we must start over, recreate the wheel, make big sweeping change. And we don’t have to.

We know stuff, even if we don’t remember that we know stuff. And sometimes we need to activate prior knowledge. Activation of prior knowledge for us might be returning to healthy practices that got ignored or abandoned over the summer, for example.

Yes, that is a possibility!

I might not have to start over from scratch on habits, but I might have to remind myself that “yes, even though it has been a while, I know how to do this”. I know how to eat healthy, get exercise, whatever those routines are that we want to re-boot.

For example, I’ve been on this sabbatical while recovering from a procedure. Because of it, and this is weird, I was not allowed to work out in the three week after my surgery. No over-exertion, no lifting of anything more than 8-10 pounds, etc. Yep, that’s a thing.

And, at the end of the three weeks, I will activate prior knowledge and say – “you know what, I had a good routine around those things, and then it fell away. I just need to get back to it”. Thinking back, I was using my maxi climber machine five minutes a day, I would take a walk 4 of 7 mornings in a week, and when I didn’t walk, I would at least stretch and do a short meditation. How about instead of re-creating my routine, because we never truly need to start over, I just re-commit to what has worked before that I just couldn’t do for a few weeks? I am much more likely to succeed if I start there!

I know how to do this and it’s time to activate prior knowledge. is. So let’s get back to it, right? I’ve done this before so I know it is do-able.

Another example, I had a great habit and rhythm for meal planning. At the beginning of the year, I would cook two or three meals on a Sunday, and then I wouldn’t have to cook for the rest of the week because our weeks get really busy. This strategy was helpful, and it made life easier. But as soon as we started traveling this summer on the weekends, that all went away. And that’s okay, because we’ve had great travels, and I’ve been exactly where I needed to be to help family members. And now as the seasons change again, I want to return to that habit. I want to activate that prior knowledge. I know how to do that, I liked it and it was so worth it. Let’s remember how to do that.

For many of us, our brain seeks novelty. So it would be really tempting for me to say, ooh, I need to completely change and do something radically different to enable my brain to get the dopamine hit it needs. And I will buy new accessories to do that new activity, and spend hours and hours learning how to do it and there will be a steep learning curve… etc.

But, I can also remind myself I will succeed more quickly if I make what I know already new again, right? That could be the activation of prior knowledge. I don’t have to keep going for new, new, new. I don’t need to take up yet another habit, I don’t have to solve the problem in a different way. I don’t have to do that. I can activate prior knowledge and redo what I already know works, but it’s recommitting to it, so it’s new again, which is actually pretty cool, especially if my brain is seeking dopamine.

To recap,

We know things. Like a grade schooler moving from 4th to 5th grade, we need to get back in the habit of learning and we need to remember what we already know, as a foundation for learning even more things. We can learn. We have the capability. It lives in us. Hello, coaching.

Prior knowledge lives in each of us. We know this stuff. We just need to remember that we know it and we need to activate it. We need to reapply it, we need to recommit to it.

We might have fallen away. And maybe we do want to change things up a little, make things look a little different.

As students go back to school and spend time the first couple weeks activating prior knowledge, we can also spend some time this week and this month activating prior knowledge.

Let’s remind ourselves what we know, what our best practices can be, have been, can be again. My challenge to you and to myself this week is to consider all the different places this idea can apply. It might not be math or social studies or science or in the classroom. There’s other knowledge, other prior knowledge we can activate. But let’s think about that. We don’t have to relearn, we don’t have to reinvent the wheel. We already know stuff because we’re smart. Let’s remember what we know and activate that prior knowledge, get ourselves back on track, or even on a new track, and make things happen.

(Sounds Cool, Right?)

How To Arrive On Time

August is a great time to recommit (or finally commit?) to getting places on-time! I have written often on this topic, so if you want to hear more, head over to my blog and search for time management strategies, or check out my past episodes.

Over the summer, a community member asked me to write about how to get places on time.

And I recall a client and friend asking me very early on in our working relationship very earnestly “How Do You Get Places On Time?” And then she looked at me and said “No, really – HOW do YOU get places on time?” She shifted it from asking for broad global tips for time management down to how did I, Colleen, actually get to her house on time that morning. She and I were both working moms with small children at the time and she wanted specifics! So, we worked on that together!

Relatedly, we were having a conversation about this at a family event recently, about how different family members or even sides of a family can have much different views on what is “on time”. And we discussed which family members will arrive early (yes, I have those family members) and which family members we need to tell that the party starts half an hour earlier than it does, so the rest of us can eat before the food gets cold! (I have those family members, too.)

Let’s get to it!

To get us started, I will use me as a case study because then I don’t have to ask permission! Here is how we do this. For a timed event over the weekend, my husband and I confirmed with each other and checking the text from the host as to the official start time of the event, and we decided we wanted to be there as it began, so let’s say 2 pm. We looked at the rest of the agenda for the day which was pretty light because it was a Saturday. We debated running the errands we needed to take care of on our way to the event or knocking them out first thing in the morning instead. And then, knowing how long it typically takes us to get to the event location, we agreed upon the time we needed to leave by to get there when the event started (On-Time).

Let’s break that down into simple steps. And as I wrote this, I realized it could be a top 10 list! So here we go!

Tip #1: To Get Places On-Time, we first need to discuss, what is “on time”, for you?

Because here’s the thing, that is not up to me. I can’t tell you want your own policies should be. But I can tell you that if you want to get better about Getting Places On Time, these are the questions you need to ask yourself. A long ago little league coach taught my oldest son that early was on time and on time was late. That verbalized a guiding principle for me!

Tip #2: Check your notes!

We need to know the event details, like start-time, and determine what time we want to arrive. Different activities require different strategies. For example, you may want to arrive…

  • 15 Minutes early for a doctor appointment when you know there will be forms to fill out;
  • 15 minutes early, at least, or as arranged, for a speaking engagement, for example, where I am presenting, to assure the event coordinators that their speaker will be ready at the agreed upon time;
  • Fashionably late (half an hour after start-time) for a graduation open house;
  • 5 minutes early for dinner reservations;
  • Exactly on time, like me for a client appointment. Arriving too early to a client appointment where the client struggles with time management can cause the client undue anxiety, as can arriving late for the appointment and for the same reasons.
  • And very specifically, early for events we must be on time for, like flights or trains that will not wait of us!

These are examples of when we need to answer the question of “When Do I Want To Arrive?” Get in the habit of asking yourself that question.

Tip #3: Understand and determine your Leave Time

Do you leave your door and you’re on your way? Or do you leave your door, wait for the elevator, take it down 11 stories, go to the parking garage, wait in line to get out and …. THEN you’re on your way? That seems an extreme example, I know. But it highlights how different our concept of time can be! I know for myself, I have a 2-3 minute process between leaving my back door and leaving my garage. So if I want to be on time, I need to factor in those invisible 3 minutes to my total travel time. And, if there is even one more person in the Leave Time equation, either at home or at work, it is likely the invisible minutes will increase.

Tip #4: Know your usual travel time, and then add 5 minutes. Or more.

Tip #5: Use GPS

Use GPS on your phone to navigate to even your usual destinations. This may sound silly, but if getting places on time is a challenge for you, perhaps it is time to try new strategies! I use GPS on work days all the time, especially if my drive is anything over 15 minutes, because my GPS will alert me to any snags, slow downs or trouble on my route. I have a client I visit one morning a month, and due to tollway construction, my travel time to her home varies widely and occasionally doubles from trip to trip! I always check the GPS early that monthly morning, to factor in any changes in my commute. If I am just out and about, running errands and not on the clock, so to speak, then I don’t need to use my GPS.

Tip #6: Have a plan for putting gas in your car.

Again, seems simple, I know. But hear me out – have a schedule or routine around filling your tank and not just when you need it. And not in the morning. Because, no you will not remember to leave early and instead you will hop in your car to get to work or your next appointment and realize that you do not have enough gas to get you there, or there and home. So dedicate a few minutes on a weekly errand day, or pick a favorite station near your house and make a habit of checking your gauge as you drive by and make a stop if you have a quarter tank or less.

Tip # 7: Consider the time needed upon arrival.

Imagine with me – your GPS has guided you to your location with ease, and you arrive a few minutes early – way to go! And… then you realize that there is only street parking (welcome to Chicago) and you have to drive around the neighborhood for 20 minutes. Or there is a parking garage, or a line for security, or any number of invisible minutes ticking away. Remember to factor in the extra wait time when you arrive, or the additional 5 minutes of walking or waiting for the elevator, etc. to your Get Places On Time formula.

Tip #8 Use a bag.

Again, hear me out. I remember sitting in the high school drop -off line with my youngest son and we would watch the kids in the cars in front of us slowly get out of the car with a shoe – just one – in one hand, a breakfast bar in the other, and 4 or 5 other loose items like a binder or chromebook, coat, the other shoe, etc., tucked in the crook of their arm. Which of course could (and occasionally did) all fall to the ground at any moment, especially when they reached back in the car for a few more loose items. More than once, we sighed with impatience, and discussed how much smoother the process would be if the kid had a backpack and actually used it. The tip, then, is to corral loose items and put them in the bag before you arrive at your destination.

Tip #9 Get Where You’re Going and THEN Relax

There are days when I could stay in my office and send off one more email, or text one more client, or read one more article. OR… I can leave now and take care of those tasks when I have arrived at my destination. My habit is to get out the door, and then take a few minutes when I have arrived at my destination to take care of those tasks. And if my travel takes longer than expected, I can tackle those tasks another time today.

Tip #10 Have a back-up plan.

All the time. We went to the White Sox game last Monday and we took the Metra. We factored in start event details and when we were meeting our friends, and planned for the train but could also have driven if the Metra idea fell through. Public transportation, car-pools, alternate routes, Uber, etc.

Give one or all of these tips a try!

College Bound? Organize Your Dorm and Small Spaces

(This content started out as a 90 minute in-person presentation, and what you are reading today was the handout, so many of the tips are in list form.)

First, let me remind you: At this time, your priorities might not be the same as your student’s priorities. We can’t control how others feel.  If your student, like mine, has no plans for decorating his or her space beyond the necessities, so be it.

Sending a student off to college? Or is an adult child moving to their first apartment? Enjoy this Grand New Adventure! And, get it organized!

Planning ahead makes these days flow smoothly. I said these quotes to my son and his friend just last week:

“If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!” (Ben Franklin) and
“In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.”  (Dwight D. Eisenhower)
 
So, let’s do this!

  • Get the list of recommended items from your school.
  • Virtual tours, and on-line schematics are also available for some schools.
  • Check Target, BB&B and elsewhere for lists, but DON’T buy everything on the lists!
  • Your student can ask for gift cards for graduation.  Check into stores close to campus, too.
  • At Orientation, we can determine what’s provided and have a chance to measure rooms and spaces. Refrigerators?  Microwaves?  Box fans? 
  • Collaborate with roommates, or start the search among friends or on Facebook.  Your students don’t need more than one coffee maker or popcorn maker, cleaning supplies, mirrors, etc., either. 
  • Start early to spread new expenses over a few months, and to give you all time to think and plan clearly.

You and your student can tackle organizing dorm rooms and small spaces the same way we organize for any project. We can use the 5 Step Organizing Process via Julie Morgenstern in her book Organizing From The Inside Out. Those 5 steps are Sort, Purge, Assign a Home, Containerize and Equalize.
 
The Sort and Purge steps go along with packing as your student gets ready to move.

  • Pack like with like; but also get things ready to use.
    • For example, as your student packs their bedding and towels, keep one set of bedding and towels right on top to use immediately when they get to their new space.
    • This makes making the bed so much easier.
    • And they can leave the rest of their bedding and towels packed until after they have set up their space.
  • Shop at home first for their stuff, to save $$ and make them more comfortable.
    • For example, my son and I were just discussing bed pillows this afternoon, and how he should pack his favorites from home to ensure a good nights sleep.
    • In addition, he is taking his bedspread from home because he really likes it.
    • I can replace the spread and his home pillows with items we already own.
  • It’s difficult to purge at this point, since our students are acquiring things at this stage. But they can choose to leave some things behind.

 Assign a Home / Containerize:  SHOPPING:

  • When considering storage for any spaces, dorms or home – utilize vertical space as much as possible.
    • Consider a bed-side bag for bedside items (especially if the bed is lofted).
      • Space bags / Ziploc totes and bags;
      • Consider over-the-the door towel hanger / coat rack / shoe holder / pockets:  for shoes, but also snacks and such. 
      • Double-hang the closet rods.
      • Use narrow metal / felted hangers.
  • You’re going to need at least a few surge protectors, and make sure they have long cords.
  • 3M Command hooks, cord keepers, photo hanging strips.
  • Plan for under-bed storage.
  • Consider tension rods for fabric covers / partitions (shower curtains and rings are awesome, too).
  • The 80/20 says we use 20% of our stuff 80% of the time.  So keep the 20% handy, and the 80% less handy.  
  • Consider multipurpose storage / furniture:
    • Collapsible / convertible / nesting / re-purpose-able storage; stackable, and with lids.
    • Trunks, as storage and extra seating (but don’t pack it full of heavy stuff).
    • Invest in good and matching items.  Higher quality is worth the added expense, and matching (clear, from same manufacturer) items will have the added bonus, typically, of nesting.
    • Packable bins.  Store stuff in them when you move back home for the summer.   Get them the same size so that they stack neatly when not in use
  • No matter what: When Shopping for storage items for dorms or new small spaces: Buy extra of good solutions, but be prepared with the receipt to return them if they’re not needed. 
    • There may be lots of things that come home after moving day, like boxes and suitcases.
  • Packing / Actual Move:
    • Assume that your move in / settle in time with your student will be limited.
    • Bring your own rubber mallet.
    • Right on top, have the Last In / First Out Box
      • soaps, clorox wipes, paper towels, cleaning supplies, snacks
      • tool box, Command hooks, and first aid kit, too
      • But mostly, bring your own rubber mallet for lofting the bed.
      • Bring your own hand cart, too. There are often carts and things to use, but they will be in high demand. So bring your own, as well.
  • Map out dorm room and where each box / its contents are to be unloaded.  Everyone should know the plan.
  • Set up the dressers away the same at home (like use a really big Ziploc bag to pack at home, and then empty out in the drawer at school)
  • As a parent – let me tell you now. Your student might not want help setting up their space beyond the physical labor of getting their stuff to their dorm room and lofting the bed or arranging the furniture. That is a conversation for your student and their roommate, or for them to decide on their own. Maybe they want you there, and maybe it is time to leave.

EQUALIZING (Maintenance):

  • Pack for current season, your student will likely be home before really cold weather. (But pack pants)
  • Make sure they have skills for independent living.
    • How to do laundry (and how often), how to sew a button, iron a shirt
    • First Aid and Illness kit; explain what things do – Tylenol, cold medicine, stomach distress, etc.
    • Grocery shopping, nutrition and a little cooking
    • General cleaning, how to and how often.

What to do with the bedroom that’s left behind:

  • Mourn just a little.  Then do a deep and thorough cleaning of the area.  Clothes, bedding, walls, carpets, garbage.
  • Spend just a little time on organizing during home visits, asking specific questions about specific items.
  • Do not take over your student’s space.  They will come home again, and will need their space again. 

I hope this process goes smoothly for you and your loved one!

College First-Aid Kit and Skills To Go With It

I’m writing this with two specific young adults in mind. And all of our our college students. And, well, the rest of us, too.

I had a conversation recently with a friend regarding the difference between “health and wellness” and “medical” issues. Sometime when I am working on paper management with clients, they lump articles regarding yoga with their lab results from a year ago into the same file and category. And while both are important to overall wellness, they really should be considered two different areas.

Let’s start out talking about Wellness. The best strategies for overall wellness, for all of us, are to eat well, exercise, stay hydrated and get adequate sleep.

In addition to managing their wellness, however, some college students have chronic health challenges that they also manage while in college that require daily monitoring and medication. Diabetes, ADHD, depression, anxiety and seizures are just a few. The habits around managing these challenges should be discussed and supported with your student.

Examples of physical support for chronic challenges might be a special dorm refrigerator to keep insulin refrigerated, local pharmacies or mail order pharmacies to maintain medication supplies, and providing a portable safe for the dorm room to protect medications.

Supports around habits and routines can look like timers and alarms to remind a student to take their medications, informing the university of chronic challenges, and establishing supportive parental protocols and troubleshooting solutions with your student to common problems before they head off to campus.

And, then there are minor (we hope) emergencies and illnesses that pop up for all of us, so please consider sending your student to college with a First Aid Kit. Since this might be the first time that your teen has been away from home, a good kit full of supplies is a great going back to school gift. Pack the basics, plus information on how to use the supplies and when to see someone at the campus health center.

What to Pack

First, figure out what it is you need to pack. Start with the basics for if your student has a cut, scrape or minor burn. Consider packing:

  • Adhesive bandages in all sizes.
  • Non-stick gauze – To cover larger wounds.
  • Adhesive tape – To help secure the gauze.
  • Antibiotic ointment – To prevent infections in a wound or minor burn.
  • Teach wound care basics, too: wash it, dry it, keep it dry. Alcohol stings and peroxide does not. And discuss when to seek medical attention (like if it continues to bleed, or the wound looks red and sore afterwards).

For sprains, strains and other similar injuries consider packing:

  • Elastic bandage – To wrap and provide compression for sprains and strains.
  • Ice pack – For when an injury first occurs.
  • Warm pack or heating pad – For bringing warmth and blood flow to an older injury.

When you need medication for a headache or heartburn, it’s nice to have some over-the-counter medications on hand and avoid a trip to the store. Pack:

  • Acetaminophen – Great for headaches and other aches and pains. Advise your college student not to use acetaminophen if he or she is going to be drinking alcohol. The combination of the two can cause liver damage. Alcohol and acetaminophen taken within a few hours of each other is a significant problem, but regular alcohol drinkers should avoid acetaminophen at any time.
  • Ibuprofen – Also great for headaches and particularly for pain from inflammation or swelling. Be aware that ibuprofen can be irritating to the stomach, so it’s still important for your college student to avoid alcohol when using this medication.
    • And, discuss when to use Acetaminophen and when to use Ibuprofen.
  • Antacids – With all of the new foods your teen will be experiencing, these are nice to have on hand.
  • Diphenhydramine (Benadryl) – Whether it’s an itchy bug bite or a stuffy nose from a friend’s dog, diphenhydramine is great for allergies of many kinds.
  • Other OTC allergy medication or cold medicine – some make us sleepy, some rev up our hearts. Read the instructions and be aware of what you taking.
  • Cough drops/sore throat lozenges – For minor throat pain, these can be great to soothe the irritation and scratchy feeling in the throat. (Honey has also been shown to calm a cough – but that might be messy in a first aid kit!)

Some other tools are great to have in a first aid kit. Think about packing:

  • Tweezers – From removing ticks to removing splinters, tweezers are essential in a first aid kit.
  • Thermometer – Your student might feel hot, but is it a fever? He or she won’t know without a thermometer. Get a regular oral digital thermometer, and make sure your teen knows how to use it.
  • Eye wash – If your teen gets something in his or her eye, like a chemical, dust or even irritating vapors, an eye wash is great to have on hand. Plain water can be used, but an eye wash is a nice extra. If eye wash is needed, though, a 911 call or trip to the emergency room is a good idea, or at least a follow-up visit to campus health services.

What to Pack It In

Now it is time to figure out what you will pack the supplies in. Any durable plastic box with a lid will do. Camping supply stores will often carry water-proof boxes that are used for camping. They are very sturdy and have a rubber gasket that will seal out any moisture. Because many first aid supplies can be ruined by water, these boxes are ideal. A clear box is also a good idea because it allows anyone to figure out what is in the box at a glance, in case of an emergency.

Don’t Forget a Few Extras

It is a great idea to include a card in the first aid kit that provides some basic health information about your student in the case of an emergency. Also, add the telephone numbers that your child might need. Information to include:

  • Insurance card – your student should carry this with them in their wallet all the time.
  • Telephone number for your child’s personal physician.
  • Campus health’s telephone number – When your teen has a fever, most times it isn’t practical to run home for care. Campus health has providers that specialize in college health and can manage many common illnesses.
  • Telephone number for your student’s health insurance – What doctor or specialist can your teen see when at school? Does your student need preauthorization for a medical procedure that is needed? Call the customer care telephone line and find out what the insurance will or will not cover.

College students should also have a few other things in the first aid kit or with them at school.

  • If your student has a chronic medical condition (seizures, diabetes, etc), he or she should have a medical alert bracelet or necklace. (There are even medical alert tattoos and thankfully that can’t be misplaced!)
  • Any personal medical information should be included on a card in your teen’s wallet and in the first aid box.
    • Personal medical information includes blood type, allergies to medicine, allergies to food or anything else that causes a severe reaction, physician’s name and office information, any medical conditions, medications taken on a regular basis, and emergency contact information (your name and any telephone numbers you could be reached at).

Packing up a few first aid essentials is a great gift for your teen. It’s also a reminder to always stay safe and a lesson in how to take care of problems while away from home. All that in one kit!

Re-Entry After Travel: Bumps in the Road

Let’s call this one Re-Entry 2.0, or “Things to do your first 24 hours home!“

We traveled the last week of May for a family wedding in Baltimore.

In the interest of getting the Midwest grandparents (4) to the East Coast wedding, last Fall we rented a 15 passenger van for the event. This was my husband’s idea and it was brilliant. He and I took turns driving on the 11-ish hour trip to and from Baltimore. Seriously, he is brilliant. He even downloaded to his phone the top 100 songs from 1963 as a road-trip soundtrack. Our passengers were happy.

Here is a picture of the bus, or officially, the “Bus (NotSchoolBus)”. I’m calling it a “Bus (NotSchoolBus)” because that is the category type listed for it on the Safety Compliance Certification Label, a.k.a., the door jamb label.

Here's a shot of me and my co-pilot somewhere on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.
Me and my co-pilot (my son) somewhere on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.

The wedding was beautiful and the reception was great! I am so happy for my niece and my new nephew. They are delightful people who deserve every good thing in life. I love the rest of my family, too. There were good times and great memories made. For the most part, every bit of planning yielded the expected and desired results. Lots of laughs, some Euchre (IFKYK), lots of food, adventures, ice cream, hiking and hanging out and of course the wedding!

AND there were a few snags. I will not go into details, but I will say that everyone is fine and now home. However, after two ambulance rides and ER visits, the Courtyard by Marriott Baltimore BWI may never let our family stay there again. Ever. And I don’t really blame them for that.

There were many uncertainties as we returned and some concern that we may have to adjust our travels or even travel back to Baltimore. And because of all the extra unexpected pieces, being intentional about re-entry was more important than ever. Here are suggestions to help you tackle Re-Entry and also set yourself up to succeed and even to travel again!

A cloudy and choppy day in Annapolis, MD

Unpack the car.

All the way. Yes, all the way. This is our usual practice, but it became necessary and not optional because we had to return the bus to the rental company. Everything had to come out of the bus, all luggage, all rubbish was disposed of, etc.

We also might take the car to the carwash and give it a vacuum, if we had traveled in our own car.

Unpack the bags.

All of them. YES, all of them.

You don’t want to wait and find a neglected apple or granola bar in your hiking backpack a few weeks down the road. Or dirty clothes or shoes, etc. Unpack the bags.

I was reminded of how important this step is when I found my mom’s handicap parking hangtag in one of our bags. Did I mention? My family lives in Michigan, and I live in Chicago. Thankfully I found the hangtag right away and it was out via UPS overnight delivery first thing the next morning.

Multiple loads of laundry were started and completed, and the dressier items like suits and dresses were taken to the cleaners.

Put the bags away.

Yes AWAY. All the bags. You could argue that if I was worried that I might have to travel again for an emergency, perhaps it would make sense to leave a suitcase out. And as an organizer, I will say – unless you know you have a trip planned, it never makes sense to leave a suitcase out. Working with so many clients over the years, very often I will walk into a closet or bedroom or basement storage space or garage, and one of the first things we do to make improvements is to put away the luggage that never made it back to its storage space. Such an obvious solution. Take the few extra minutes and put the bags away.

Toiletries: Re-fill and repack, order extras.

I know I have spoken about this step before, in podcasts last Spring and Summer. It was even more important that I re-filled and re-packed my supplies this week, though, in case I need to travel again soon.

Recharge stuff.

I have a power bank that lives in my travel tech bag, and I used it on our adventure. Not knowing what this week might bring, I made sure to re-charge it. I charged my portable keyboard for my IPad for the same reason. My daily habit, travel or not, is to recharge my phone, AirPods, Apple watch and IPad at night so those are good to go whenever.

Buy groceries.

We needed to restock A LOT of items when we got back from our adventures, and I knew that was a necessity even before we left. I planned a trip to Costco for our first day back and I let Costco do the cooking this week (I’m looking at you, rotisserie chicken, stuffed peppers and backed chicken alfredo). Later that day, I placed the Jewel grocery order for all the stuff I don’t buy at Costco. Within 24 hours of arriving home, the cabinets and fridge were back to normal levels.

So this next step is where the Re-Entry 2.0 comes in.

We were gone for 6 days! And it was awesome! As I described in a text today, “Weekend was mostly amazing, with just a few snags”. I can unpack, repack and re-stock. I can re-charge actual batteries.

But… I also need to re-charge metaphorical batteries.

With the few snags, I actually asked for flexibility and grace via email and texts when people needed something from me this week. I don’t usually feel the need to explain myself or excuse a delay, but this week was not a typical week for lots of reasons.

I restocked groceries, purchased prepared foods and I didn’t expect myself or anyone else to cook. I slept. I was very tired. At writing time, I still am. These last few days, I gave up trying to stay up when my brain and body said ‘enough’. I re-committed to most of my healthy habits: hydrated, returned to exercising, healthier food options, etc.. And, I set myself up to succeed in case I was called away out of town again.

Now… I just need to tackle the rest of the to-do list! But that is another episode for another day!

May Asks A Lot Of Us

Tell me if it’s just me, because hey – maybe it is. But the month of May asks a lot of us, doesn’t it?

May has a crazy-busy event schedule. I don’t happen to have anybody graduating from anything this year, or any other major life events for my sons this year.  I understand, though, for those who do! We were reflecting over the weekend that two years ago this week, in a 9 day span, the Klimczak household had an engagement in Michigan, a college graduation in Indiana and a high school graduation in Illinois with all of the assorted extra events attached with those as well.  Oh, and a round of Covid, and two sons started new jobs.

May is just busy.  I was talking to an accountability partner on our bi-weekly call last week and she mentioned, aptly, that the pace is wearing on her.  Yes, I would agree.

May asks a lot of us. Even just the typical stuff.

My body clock is shifting from hibernation mode to active mode.  It’s brighter earlier and energy has returned. If anybody has seasonal affective disorder, you know what I mean.

Brightness has returned. We are up earlier and out later in the evening because it’s still daylight.  The biological shift to be out and about and do more things is a real thing.

Days are longer, temperatures are warmer. I planted a container garden so I need to switch my habits this time of year to factor in watering my plants every day.

I also shifted my routine to add daily walking into the schedule first thing since it’s bright earlier.

Energy shifts. Routines shift.

Last week, while I was starting to work on this content, I was driving to pick up my college student son from campus to move him home until August.  I was saying to a friend that even though it is only 56 degrees and cloudy today, it is the beginning of our summer.

It is that shift to summer for us because John moved home and this is his summer break. Like I said, it might not look like summer, but it’s our summer because John is home for summer break and the household and routines shift.

And there is the end-of-the-year school year extravaganzas. I had the opportunity to address the National Junior Honor Society induction ceremony at Central Middle School last week. What a great group of kids. I’m telling you, all those parents and all those kids should be so proud.  End of the school year concerts, graduations, ceremonies. And then the weddings, graduation parties, etc.

Yes, the schedule is revving up. We have a wedding in our family the end of May in Baltimore, and that is a really big deal!

May is often a month of transitions, so it doesn’t surprise me that historically May is “Revise your Work Schedule” Month. 

We change our schedule for biological reasons, in response to the seasons and shifts in daylight. We change our schedules around our different roles in our lives.

I don’t have children in elementary school or high school anymore. But because of my board of education work, I am still attached to the academic schedule. Our last day of classes is the first week in June.

So, let’s take a look at how to manage all of this.

The first step is the awareness that it’s happening. Awareness that it’s “That Time of Year”. Awareness that, thankfully, things are also wrapping up at the same times that other things are getting started. When my kids were younger, we would add in Spring and Summer sports to the calendar and then school year responsibilities would slowly taper off.  Maybe you have responsibilities that only happen in the winter. Many groups and meetings take summer breaks. My choir at church breaks for the summer. Responsibilities shift, and in some ways, the load is lightened, which is nice.

Awareness. Awareness. Awareness. Identify if it’s happening, and that it is happening to you. Take this as an opportunity to make changes if you’d like. 

Since culturally and biologically things are shifting anyway, you could also take advantage of this as an opportunity to choose to make some shifts for yourself. And so how do we do that? How do we make those shifts?

Start with awareness.

In my call last week with my accountability partner, she mentioned that writing up the report for our call helped her review what she had accomplished in the last two weeks and also what she hopes to accomplish in the next two weeks. That is how our sessions work.

Our accountability calls was a good way for her to get her thoughts out of her brain and on to paper (or in an email) where she could put them in order for herself.

I mentioned the same to her, that the wall full of post-it notes that had been next to me, as a product of a very professional busy couple of last couple of weeks, have been taken down as the tasks have been completed, and the wall is now clear.

As I said, awareness that it’s happening. And what to do about it.

Grab a calendar, paper or digital.  In my accountability call, I stated I would pull out a paper calendar so I can visualize the next three months. I will map out when we travel in the next three months. For the wedding, for a week in Michigan, taking my son back to college, concerts and other scheduled events. Putting the big boulders on the calendar and making sure that the big stuff gets taken care of helps us determine what we else we can say yes to and what we can’t.

Also, grabbing that calendar and the to do list and getting all of the ideas out of our brains and into a usable form really helps. Yes, now is the time. So I’m saying that out loud for you and for me.

Then look at the tasks attached to transitions.  I spoke to graduating 8th graders and their parents, right? They are heading off to high school in a few short months, and these kinds of transitions have other tasks and steps attached to them.  The book list – perhaps summer reading? The supply list. What do we need, clothing-wise? Sports physicals and Fall sports training that starts on August 1?  What do we need to do to start to embrace the new calendar or schedule? What are the things that we can do now to get us better ready for that transition in the fall? Plotting those on the calendar is super important.

These are all important things to think about, and they’re kind of the next natural progression of these major lifestyle shifts now.

We should be busy enjoying the successful ends of some things, but remembering that with the ending of one thing often comes the beginning of something else.

My son moved home for the summer after a really great semester, but in August he will move into an apartment and we will need to do some planning now for that then. We have to start looking at what does he need to be more independent when he moves into his apartment in August. And that is not a question to ask in August. That’s a question to ask now, or as soon as possible.

At least when your mom’s an organizer, I guess it is. Just some things to think about!

To recap:

  • Be aware that transitions are happening.
  • Make some decisions for yourself about how you want things to go.
  • Grab a calendar and look forward to the next 3 months-ish.
  • Grab that to-do list and make some notes and plans to make the transitions go more smoothly, and also to set yourself up to succeed when transitions come again.

I’m wishing you a great May, a great start of summer.

I hope you take time to celebrate events and milestones, that you take time to plan some relaxing times for the next few months.  Transitions are inevitable, but how can we embrace them and act on them and take an active and intentional hand in crafting them so they don’t just happen to us. They are things that we make happen in the way that we want to make them happen. And I hope that with a little planning now, you can embrace the transitions and the adjusted schedule for summer with as much ease and joy as possible.

How To Get Back On Track

When naming this article and episode, I tried Catawampus – as in, “when it all goes catawampus”, but my SEO score on my blog did not think that was a good idea. Noted.

I was a guest on the EP podcast episode that dropped last Tuesday, March 12.

We recorded on Monday, March 11th because that is the day I record my episode, too. And I was a guest on the EP Podcast because Chris, my producer, had a family emergency over the weekend with his 18 year old daughter. And she’s fine. Healing well.

And everybody’s fine in my house too. Everybody’s okay. We’ll start with that.

But we talked through, first of all, the situation and that it was crazy for them, I know. And then the question he asked me was, “After the fact, what do you do to pick up the pieces?” You’ve been through this dramatic and potentially traumatic situation and what do you do to get back on track?

In his situation, he has children other than the post-surgical one to take care of. He needs to take care of his daughter while she recovers. Anything he had planned for that day and also for the days to follow obviously just went out the window because, well, that’s what the situation required.

We’re going to do it because it needs done and we’re going to do it because our kids win and because we love them. And guys, I really do love you. So if you’re listening – well, I don’t think my kids listen to my podcast, but some of their friends do. And then we pick up the pieces and get back to normal, get back to work.

Here’s the twist. We recorded at noon on Monday because we usually record at noon on Mondays. We have systems for these things and everything else. I’m still like a week behind. I’d like to get back on track with that personally. That is a leftover from my recent surgery.

My college age son was home for his Spring Break and there was an incident and he lost consciousness in the kitchen. I’ll leave it at that. It was scary. He ended up going to the ER in an ambulance. So, a shout out to the Evergreen Park Fire Department, the EMTs when we called 911 were awesome and competent and kind. They took care of business, they took care of my son, they loaded him up and we went to the hospital.

One thing Chris mentioned on his episode was that his 18 year old was still eligible for the pediatric ER, and if you have to choose, the pediatric ER is a better place for a young person than the regular ER. And I found it surreal that, within 8 hours of having that conversation with him, I found myself in the front seat of an ambulance while they unloaded my 19 year old in the ambulance bay next to the door labeled Pediatric ER at Christ Hospital.

Never, in no imagination of my day could I have foreseen that I would be confirming that information from him within 8 hours of recording that episode. But there we were. And to repeat, he’s fine. My son’s fine. And I have his permission to write about and talk about this. He’s ok.

Let me make the rest of this very long story short. We were there for 24 more hours. We arrived around 7:30 pm Monday. They ran tests and started the admission process at 11 pm. He was finally discharged from the ER at 08:00 pm on Tuesday night, they had not yet found him a bed in 24 hours

When you’re in the ER, you gain perspective. Obviously, other people were having a much worse time of life than we were. My son’s ok.

Simple things. My son was in the ER but he had a room with doors. A lot of people didn’t. He didn’t have a bathroom or a shower, and I didn’t sleep at all because the room is not set up with a chair for a non-patient to sleep in. I never pulled an all-nighter in college, that didn’t happen until I was a parent!

We had family and friends texting and checking in on us, with offers of support and assistance if we needed anything. I am so grateful. And I’m grateful for Greg, my husband, so that we could tag team and I could go home for a few hours of sleep when he came back first thing Tuesday morning because we didn’t want to miss any of the doctors in consultation, etc.

But as Chris mentioned, once the dust settles, right, after all this happens, then what? When you look around your house and you realize that all of the routines that you normally have that support your life were completely abandoned, for a few days. Where do you start? Where?

I’ve talked about emergencies recently. I had a recent surgery as well. Five weeks ago I had surgery on my nose. It was planned. It was February 13, but I had known about it since the end of November. It wasn’t news. It ended up being more complex, more invasive, and I had a lot more downtime and a lot more healing that I needed to do. That was news, but the schedule was already cleared, I had no expectations of myself already. It wasn’t an emergency, it was a hassle. I won’t say it was fun. I’m still not done healing. I still have swelling and follow up appointments. It’s not don, but for the most part, I’m good to go.

But trips to the ER, for your daughter and her appendix, for my son in the ER for 24 hours and a lot of diagnostics to determine what’s going on and what to follow up on. Those are emergencies. They both have had good outcomes so far. I know it could be worse. Oh, my God, do I know it could be worse.

Once the emergency has passed, now what? What do we do to get back on track?

I came home at 830 Tuesday morning after tagging my husband out at the hospital, having not slept for 27 hours. I set up my phone and apple watch to charge, took a shower, brushed my teeth, had a really big glass of water and slept for 2 hours. Then I got up and I made sure things were taken care of, sent a few emails, took a shower, got dressed, grabbed a protein shake for the road and headed back up to the hospital.

On Tuesday night, when we were finally discharged, we asked the question again.

First things first: We’re headed home, do we need to eat? We can pick up something on the way.
All right, I’m going to drop you guys off, and go to the pharmacy for my son’s prescriptions.

Anything we need grocery wise? No? Okay. We just had people over, so we have a full fridge of food.

Everybody was comfortable and happy.

Next, Laundry. Unpack the bag from the hospital Yes, let’s start a load of laundry.

Next, let’s make sure maintenance has been occurring. Load the dishwasher, bring in the mail, make sure that there’s no packages out front.

None of this new. I think that was the point that I made when I talked to with Chris on his podcast. We don’t do new stuff. We take a minute and remember what our routines are. And routines are there to help us make sure that our needs are being consistently met. That’s what routines do for us. And so first things first, we’re to check in on the needs. Needs are food, clothing, shelter, safety, warmth. Right? Basic bottom level of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs?

Check in on those, make sure that all of those are functioning. Food, clothing, shelter, safety, warmth. Once we take care of those needs, then we can move up the list.

Now, when we got home from the hospital, finally, it was after 08:00 on Tuesday night after very little sleep. At that point, another need, very rapidly was becoming sleep. I could have tried to do more, but it wouldn’t have worked. Sleep is also a need, and that was the answer. Meeting needs consistently so that everybody can continue to function in survival. I’d love to get into optimal thriving mode. But first things first is survival. Food, clothing, shelter, safety, warmth, right? I mean, that’s where we got to start.

So, when in doubt, that’s where we spend our first hours of attention, is making sure that those needs are met for the moment. In the moment. Then, how to continue to meet those needs for the next couple of hours and then days. We start with needs, we start small, we start with what is right in front of us. We don’t need to do the big stuff right now.

So to recap: First things first. Having routines, very helpful routines, helped me to grab what I needed to grab, throw it all in my backpack (which is my purse) that is always sitting in the same place and run out the door with the ambulance people. Anybody I need to contact was already programmed in my phone. All of my apps are up to date. Everything is up to date. My wallet has our insurance card and has all of John’s information, all of my son’s information.

There are things that maintenance, that routines absolutely provided. My son is otherwise in good health. I’m in good health. Maintaining good health eliminates helped rule out some potential problems because he’s in otherwise good health.

When emergencies happen, that’s it. That is where you need to be. Everything else needed to fall away. With my son is the only place I need to be. The rest of life will all be waiting for me when I get back, for better or for worse.

But that’s the answer. So we create routines because in the heat of it, in the heart of it, in crazy times, we need to have those structures in place to keep things going. So we have habits around needs, so those needs continue to be consistently met. And to give us the habits, the reminders of how to get back to some semblance of normal when our days haven’t necessarily looked normal.

Start with needs. Start with what is right in front of you. Don’t create something new, but get back to your routines. And that, my friends, is how to get back on track.

Meal Planning: What Is Healthy? And What Are Your Goals?

Today’s topic has been on my list for a few months now, and I am ready to share!  Over the last year, I have shifted to more coaching and less-in-person organizing, and that shift will continue. AND, not surprisingly, meal planning is still a hot topic for my clients and presentations.  Because, well, we all eat.

As I sat down to write this content, I had just finished wrapping up the dinner dishes. Two hours or so before that, in about an hour, my husband and I had assembled and cooked three separate dinners, ate one (with leftovers) and put the rest in the fridge for the next few days.

How?  Why?  And why am I telling you this?  Well, let me tell you a story!

Last summer, I rebooted my “An Organized Kitchen” presentation.  I had many speaking requests last summer for “An Organized Kitchen” and Meal Planning content and I thought it was time for a refresh.

I don’t remember a time when we didn’t meal plan. Much of my past content about meal planning is from the view-point of cooking with and for kids and my family, which is all really good content! But as I spend more time coaching my clients and thinking things through for myself, I recognize that what we eat, how we eat it, how it gets to our dinner plates – all of these impact our days and weeks and life!

I could be surprised by how many of my coaching clients want to be more productive… and eat better.  Or that want to find that next new job or career … and have better habits around eating a healthy breakfast. Or, are facing lifestyle shifts and changes, and realize that eating healthier and finding time to exercise would go far in helping them face their challenges.

I could be surprised, but I am not.

Nutrition is a building block for many other things, it is part of the foundation of our life, and we want it to be a strong foundation.

I follow personal development influencers, and a quote from Brendon Burchard comes to mind. I’m paraphrasing, but the idea was that we can start to make positive change in our lives by being intentional about what we eat. We have to eat, right? It is something we already do. While adding in an hour work-out every day 7 days a week may seem daunting, making adjustments on what we do every day anyway seems less intimidating.

In my newly re-booted Meal Planning content, we start with two questions.

  • “What does healthy mean to you?” and
  • “What are your Meal planning goals?”

There are SO MANY ideas on what healthy eating means.  Low carb, no carb, gluten free, keto, paleo, vegan, lo-cal, high volume, sustainable eco foods, plant based, intermittent fasting.

But my question to You is “What Does Healthy Mean To You?”  Because if you tell me you want to eat healthy, that can be something vastly different than what I consider healthy.  And since I am NOT a nutritionist, I would suggest you figure that out for yourself as you figure out meal planning.  Because there are SO MANY IDEAS AND OPINIONS out there, if you don’t have a way to focus in and narrow down your options, you are going to be overwhelmed before you even begin.

The second question then, is “What are your Meal Planning goals?”

Yes, goals.  Did you know you can have meal planning goals?  Meal Planning goals might be…

  • Save money. Or waste less food. (It’s estimated that the average American wastes 216 pounds of food a year. And an average family of 4 throws away $1600 in produce a year. (per rts.com))
  • Save time, have less hassle.
  • Teach yourself and your family how to cook.
  • Establish healthy habits and / or support. Or, most likely,
  • Some combination of these and others!

Just this week, two different clients reported wanting to make positive changes including meal planning. One was seeking a plan that would let her adhere to an subscription menu and eating plan that she receives via email every week on her own schedule.

For another, she works full time and wants to meal plan better for having lunches and dinners for the whole work week.

One of my sons moved back into theatre housing in Indiana last week since rehearsals start tomorrow. He stopped by and mentioned that he had spent time meal prepping after he unpacked his stuff.  I asked him those questions – What is Healthy ? And What are your goals?

For the What Is Healthy answer, he is aiming for 30 grams of protein per meal, and more home-cooked foods. His goal is to have nutritious food made ahead of time so he can pack his lunches to take to work / rehearsals, and also not have to cook when he gets home if he’s tired.  Brilliant.

My personal example: As we entered 2024, I realized that January was going to be very busy (and it was). I am not going to report out on what specifically I consider healthy eating because that is not really the point. I will say, though, that I want home cooked food, to eat well, to save time and money and minimize stress, and to not rely on take-out. And to meet those goals, my strategy was and continues to be to cook two nights a week, most likely Friday and Sunday, and make multiple meals on cooking nights to carry us through until the next cooking night.

The evening I described when I started is an example of supporting my meal planning goals.

I was home that afternoon and evening, which doesn’t always happen.  And since I knew that morning that I would have a little more time at home that evening, I pulled from the freezer some ground turkey and Polish sausage to thaw. At dinner time, we diced many green peppers, an onion and a few potatoes, browned some ground turkey, and using what we had in the fridge (left over rice plus staples) and freezer (already browned ground beef), assembled Inside Out Stuffed Pepper casserole, Egg Roll in a Bowl (a new recipe, and so delish!), and baked Polish sausage with diced potatoes, peppers and onions.

All of these recipes store well, warm up well, and are currently waiting patiently in my fridge for future consumption. We can eat well and free up time by not having to cook or clean up for a few days.  We save time, we save money, I stress less and we still eat delicious food.  Check and check!

Next week, I will delve deeper into the how-to.

So, what’s it going to be?  What does healthy mean to you?  And what are your meal planning goals?  Keep the answers in mind, and tune in next week when we talk about how to make it all happen.