Category: Motivation

Advice For Life’s Next Chapter

Did you know? I have the honor and responsibility of being an elected official as a member of our local Board of Education. Evergreen Park Elementary School District 124, to be specific.

I do consider it both an honor and a responsibility. It is a decision that we make, to pursue and support education, to serve our communities. And I love it. And some day, I don’t. Most days I do.

I love that I get to serve and support 1800+ students and 300+ staff members. I get to help make our community stronger. Yes, it’s cool. I occasionally get to do cool things. And, sometimes I have to do really hard things, and sometimes I have to do things that are not cool. And all of that is ok, because, again, it is a decision we make to serve and I don’t take that lightly.

Today, though, I want to talk about a cool thing. One of the perks.

Every year, the Board Of Education members, as we distribute diplomas, shake the hands of and look in the eyes and smile at our 8th grade Central Middle School graduates as they finish their time in Evergreen Park Elementary School District 124, and move on to high school and the next stages of their lives. And it’s awesome. And for the last few years, as President, I also get to give a speech.

I get to address the families and our staff that are there, and I get this one last opportunity to speak to our students. I spend a lot of time considering what message I want to deliver to the students.

I try to write words that I hope the students remember, and, well, if they don’t, it’s recorded so they can go back and listen to it again on YouTube if they want. But as any good speaker knows, the words I say are not about me as the speaker, they are about the audience, our students. What do I hope they take with them when they go?

And, as I wrote this intro for today’s content, I am thinking ahead because I have an opportunity to address our staff before the first day of school in a few weeks. I’m already considering what exactly do I want our staff members to take with them that day, too. What do they need to hear and know as they start the school year? I want them to know how much I appreciate them, how much the BOE appreciates them, how truly amazing they are in guiding our most precious commodity, our students. And that I really do believe we have just the best staff. So I will be telling them that in five minutes or less, in a few weeks.

As I wrote the words for our students, it made my heart happy that I had one last chance to speak to them all before we parted ways. And for us today, I thought it might be fitting as we all shift into August, and perhaps are sending students back to school or we might be adjusting our schedule and thinking our next big thoughts, maybe these words are for you, too.

Good evening.

It is my absolute honor and privilege to have a few moments to address the central middle school class of 2024 this evening.

I want to say “Thank You” to all of you here for coming.  And not just coming to this graduation ceremony.  

I know all that goes in to getting to this point. 

Thank you to our teachers and staff who have instructed and guided our kids along the way. 

These students have benefited immeasurably from these dedicated, passionate educators.  

I thank every one of you for your service.  

These educators arrive early, stay late, they’re in the classrooms and hallways, at extra events on evenings and weekends, they are always available via email.  Trust me, I know. 

And they truly have our student’s best interests in mind.  We are so fortunate, and I am so grateful.

Thank you, parents.  And grandparents and aunts and uncles and all those folks who also show up. 

Every day. 

I’m not even going to finish the equation, of number of mornings multiplied by number of school years so far!  Backpacks packed, homework, gym uniforms, sport uniforms, band instruments, car pools, field trips, forms completed.  Then there are the games and concerts and events that we are seriously SO happy to attend.  Thank you, parents and loved ones.

Students – yes, tonight is about you, but some time this evening, Please stop and look your parents and grandparents and significant adults in the eyes and thank them for helping you get to this occasion.  They love you so much, trust me.

Now, I would like to address our graduates.

  • Every person here this evening is here because of you.
  • We are reflecting on where you have been, celebrating with you for where you are, and dreaming big with you for where you are going.

Students, I have four things to ask of you this evening.  

First, Do the right thing, even when no one is watching.  

Don’t bother with easy, or just skating by, because you think no one will notice.  YOU will notice.  

And once you know you can count on yourself to do the right thing, your confidence and capacity for doing the right thing will grow.  

Perhaps you’ll find yourself in a situation and you’re not sure what the right thing to do is?  Go with kindness.  Justice.  Fairness.  Thinking and thoughtfulness.  Those are always going to be the right thing.  And The Right thing might not be what everyone else is doing, but that’s ok, they are just waiting for you to set an example.

Second, Find your people.  

Look around, and see the people that are doing what you want to do, what you aspire to do.

Surround yourself with good people who will lift you up, build you up.  

Who aren’t about drama, who are also the ones doing the right thing even when no one is looking.

Find and appreciate those people, and more importantly, strive to be that best person for others.    

Next, Embrace the small and powerful word – Yet.

Three small letters, y e t.

Yet.

We may think we need to have everything figured out.  And we will.  That day will come.  But it might not be here Yet.  And that’s ok. Open your mind and your heart, and be kind to yourself as you figure things out.

Finally, Start and end with gratitude.  

Be grateful for your natural born talents and your diligently honed skills.  

Be grateful for your family who loves you, for the education you are working for, for your friends and our community.  

Imagine, remembering just one thing you’re grateful for as you start and finish your day every day. 

Imagine how great that would feel, and how much that small habit would positively impact your life.  

To Recap:

Do the Right Thing.  

Find Your People.

Embrace Yet.

And Start and End with Gratitude

I’m going to take my own advice here, and end by saying thank you, Central Middle School class of 2024. I can’t wait to see what each of you will continue to achieve in big and small ways, in the years to come.  Congratulations and Well Done!

Hope In Normalizing: “I Can Do This, Too”

This week, I want to introduce an idea called Normalizing, and why I think it is a useful and hopeful idea.

I was talking to a friend recently about a health challenge she is facing.

She was saying that we can believe we are all alone in what we are suffering with because we’ve never really talked about it with anyone.  However, when you start talking to people about your health issue, suddenly you find out that the problem is common, that many people have the same problem, or at least know somebody with the problem.

Ummm… let’s say gallbladder issues.  (And no, I do not have gallbladder issues, and neither does she, I’m just using this as an example).

Imagine: I’m feeling fine, and then one day, I’m not feeling so fine.  I muddle through for a few weeks or even months, with flare-ups and the like, getting better between and then another flare up happens. I finally go to the doctor. They run their tests, give me a diagnosis, share some strategies with me and also schedule a surgery because the gallbladder has to be removed.

Now that I know more and need to make plans, I mention my health challenge at work (because I need time off), or I bring it up with friends or family or the lady at the grocery store because now that I have a diagnosis and a plan, I feel more comfortable talking about it…

And when I bring it up, I find out that EVERYONE has had this problem, or knows someone who has had this problem.

You know the stories you hear, “my husband / wife / parent / child / coworker / friend / sibling has or had this problem”. We all may want to feel special and unique, but probably not when it comes to our gallbladder!

Hearing the stories about how what we thought was one-of-a-kind really isn’t… that is not a bad thing. I actually consider it kind of a good thing.  It feels hopeful to me.

In coaching, we talk about normalizing. Per Dictionary.com, Normalizing may mean “to cause (something previously considered abnormal or unacceptable) to be treated as normal”. 

This can be negative like when we learn to tolerate something that might be negative so that it becomes our new normal.  But it can also be a positive thing, when we expand our understanding of what can be typical and normal, so we no longer feel shame or worry about an issue or circumstance.

As in, when you find out that this issue that you’re having that is probably really rocking your world if you are in the middle of it and things are sore or are uncomfortable is actually 100% survivable.  And do-able.

Like when you’ve got something medical going on and all you seem to do is go to doctor’s appointments and do follow-up and it feels like a full-time job. And it’s really impacting your life and you feel frustrated. You feel like you’re alone in this. Like no one is going to understand. 

And yet, they will.

We can’t necessarily see our way through this situation because we have never been in it before.  We don’t know how long it will take, or when we may start to feel better.  But… other people know.  Other people have faced it and have come out the other side.

So we normalize. We normalize because sometimes we need to hear that we are not alone in whatever it is we’re going through. Sometimes we need to feel like we’re not alone AND that someone else in a similar situation has figured it out.

They have figured it out. And therefore, so can I.

If somebody else has figured all this out, I can too. And there is hope. There is hope in that. I can, too.

Let’s switch it up, I will use Blackberry Jam as an analogy.

Last year I learned how to make and can jam. Like preserves, hot water bath, mason jars, shelf stable, etc.

I had promised a loved one that I would find someone to make jam for an event, and I did not find a jam maker so I became the jam maker.   Here’s the thing.  I knew that I could.  I had a working knowledge of what was involved. And we have YouTube and websites and books, plus there is Amazon.com for ordering the tools.  It’s all there.  It’s all learnable. It’s all there. I knew I could do it.

I like to think I am pretty smart, and I am definitely curious and open to learning.  And hey, people living hundreds of years ago with none of the resources I have now figured it out.  I can do this.  And I did. And it was good!

Now I know how to make jam and also preserve it.  I’m pretty sure I still have some in my cabinet from last Fall. I still have all the tools and the know-how, to do it again. We can call that normalized.

Sometimes, my coaching clients or myself or any one of us, really, can think that the situation that we find ourselves in at this moment is so singular that no one has ever figured out what to do about it. And therefore, we can’t even hope to make things better.

And that’s not true.  I’m here to tell you that’s not true because I guarantee you there have been similar situations where people have figured things out and have come through on the other side just fine.

I consider normalizing to be optimistic. I consider normalizing, when done right, to be hopeful. When we are in the midst of something that we don’t know how to figure out, it’s hopeful to know that someone else figured it out. You are most likely able, you’re going to be able to figure it out as well.  And next time, you can be the resource for somebody.

We have more resources right now than we ever had ever in history to figure things out, ever. You have more resources now than anyone has ever had before. Whoa.

But it’s true. We have more knowledge now than anyone has ever had before. How hopeful and optimistic is that?! It’s awesome. And, if you want to figure things out for yourself, I am here to help. 

Re-Entry After Travel: Bumps in the Road

Let’s call this one Re-Entry 2.0, or “Things to do your first 24 hours home!“

We traveled the last week of May for a family wedding in Baltimore.

In the interest of getting the Midwest grandparents (4) to the East Coast wedding, last Fall we rented a 15 passenger van for the event. This was my husband’s idea and it was brilliant. He and I took turns driving on the 11-ish hour trip to and from Baltimore. Seriously, he is brilliant. He even downloaded to his phone the top 100 songs from 1963 as a road-trip soundtrack. Our passengers were happy.

Here is a picture of the bus, or officially, the “Bus (NotSchoolBus)”. I’m calling it a “Bus (NotSchoolBus)” because that is the category type listed for it on the Safety Compliance Certification Label, a.k.a., the door jamb label.

Here's a shot of me and my co-pilot somewhere on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.
Me and my co-pilot (my son) somewhere on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.

The wedding was beautiful and the reception was great! I am so happy for my niece and my new nephew. They are delightful people who deserve every good thing in life. I love the rest of my family, too. There were good times and great memories made. For the most part, every bit of planning yielded the expected and desired results. Lots of laughs, some Euchre (IFKYK), lots of food, adventures, ice cream, hiking and hanging out and of course the wedding!

AND there were a few snags. I will not go into details, but I will say that everyone is fine and now home. However, after two ambulance rides and ER visits, the Courtyard by Marriott Baltimore BWI may never let our family stay there again. Ever. And I don’t really blame them for that.

There were many uncertainties as we returned and some concern that we may have to adjust our travels or even travel back to Baltimore. And because of all the extra unexpected pieces, being intentional about re-entry was more important than ever. Here are suggestions to help you tackle Re-Entry and also set yourself up to succeed and even to travel again!

A cloudy and choppy day in Annapolis, MD

Unpack the car.

All the way. Yes, all the way. This is our usual practice, but it became necessary and not optional because we had to return the bus to the rental company. Everything had to come out of the bus, all luggage, all rubbish was disposed of, etc.

We also might take the car to the carwash and give it a vacuum, if we had traveled in our own car.

Unpack the bags.

All of them. YES, all of them.

You don’t want to wait and find a neglected apple or granola bar in your hiking backpack a few weeks down the road. Or dirty clothes or shoes, etc. Unpack the bags.

I was reminded of how important this step is when I found my mom’s handicap parking hangtag in one of our bags. Did I mention? My family lives in Michigan, and I live in Chicago. Thankfully I found the hangtag right away and it was out via UPS overnight delivery first thing the next morning.

Multiple loads of laundry were started and completed, and the dressier items like suits and dresses were taken to the cleaners.

Put the bags away.

Yes AWAY. All the bags. You could argue that if I was worried that I might have to travel again for an emergency, perhaps it would make sense to leave a suitcase out. And as an organizer, I will say – unless you know you have a trip planned, it never makes sense to leave a suitcase out. Working with so many clients over the years, very often I will walk into a closet or bedroom or basement storage space or garage, and one of the first things we do to make improvements is to put away the luggage that never made it back to its storage space. Such an obvious solution. Take the few extra minutes and put the bags away.

Toiletries: Re-fill and repack, order extras.

I know I have spoken about this step before, in podcasts last Spring and Summer. It was even more important that I re-filled and re-packed my supplies this week, though, in case I need to travel again soon.

Recharge stuff.

I have a power bank that lives in my travel tech bag, and I used it on our adventure. Not knowing what this week might bring, I made sure to re-charge it. I charged my portable keyboard for my IPad for the same reason. My daily habit, travel or not, is to recharge my phone, AirPods, Apple watch and IPad at night so those are good to go whenever.

Buy groceries.

We needed to restock A LOT of items when we got back from our adventures, and I knew that was a necessity even before we left. I planned a trip to Costco for our first day back and I let Costco do the cooking this week (I’m looking at you, rotisserie chicken, stuffed peppers and backed chicken alfredo). Later that day, I placed the Jewel grocery order for all the stuff I don’t buy at Costco. Within 24 hours of arriving home, the cabinets and fridge were back to normal levels.

So this next step is where the Re-Entry 2.0 comes in.

We were gone for 6 days! And it was awesome! As I described in a text today, “Weekend was mostly amazing, with just a few snags”. I can unpack, repack and re-stock. I can re-charge actual batteries.

But… I also need to re-charge metaphorical batteries.

With the few snags, I actually asked for flexibility and grace via email and texts when people needed something from me this week. I don’t usually feel the need to explain myself or excuse a delay, but this week was not a typical week for lots of reasons.

I restocked groceries, purchased prepared foods and I didn’t expect myself or anyone else to cook. I slept. I was very tired. At writing time, I still am. These last few days, I gave up trying to stay up when my brain and body said ‘enough’. I re-committed to most of my healthy habits: hydrated, returned to exercising, healthier food options, etc.. And, I set myself up to succeed in case I was called away out of town again.

Now… I just need to tackle the rest of the to-do list! But that is another episode for another day!

The Daily List Right In Front Of Me

I worked with a new client recently. It was truly a pleasure to meet and work with them. It is great to meet someone who, like many of us, is already on this journey to more intention, more productivity, to figuring out what it is they want to accomplish today and also in life. And who is ready to try different tools to help them do that.

Maybe you have the exact perfect tools to help you do exactly what you want to do, and that’s awesome. Good for you. I love that for you.

I’m there, too, but I’m also always looking for new ideas because I try them out for myself and collect those ideas and share them with all of you, my community.

I worked with two productivity coaching clients this week in their work spaces.

One client realized for themselves in the last month that a daily to-do list could help them get more done, so they are exploring a daily list. This person is a graphic designer, and they created their own visually appealing daily one-page. The list is not too structured. There were check boxes and empty lines so they could write their lists of tasks and projects and intentions and make it completely different for themselves every day, depending on what their day held.

Their process includes printing tomorrow’s form today and taking a few minutes to jot down tomorrow’s plan as they wrap up today. Doing this ahead of time means they are more likely to capture tasks they want to complete first thing in the morning, or perhaps there are timed events on the calendar already that they want to remember, like “8 am, take kids to school”, “10 am, Zoom call with potential client”, “Noon, physically create that product or buy supplies, etc.”

For this client, they also add personal stuff, like take a shower, start some laundry, stop at the grocery, make dinner. You know, the things that we have to do in life.

The other client I worked on the Daily List with is further along in her business and her productivity coaching journey. She has consistent, well established and supportive routines around most of her personal tasks, so her Daily List is specifically for business related items. Many of these items are hosted on digital to-do lists, too, or shared with her assistant, but this client really values this Daily List “in [her] face ALL THE TIME” to keep her on track. (I know she is a listener, so she’s going to know I am talking about her).

And this client and I have worked together over time. She is an established business owner and has figured out more processes and systems. Her personal tasks and routines happen consistently, so her Daily List is for items like: team management and helping the team members to thrive; strategic planning and big picture planning for the company; working with her assistant to plan the week, etc.

When I was first starting my business 21 years ago, I had a wonderful mentor who was already an established professional organizer, Pamela. She shared with me then her daily one-page planning sheet, with areas for calls to make, personal metrics like exercise and water consumption, appointments, tasks, etc. I used a similar form for many years. Now, I use digital tools and reminders, but a good list in my bullet journal – in front of my face – is sometimes what is required for me to get things done on a busy day!

What do all of these people and strategies have in common?

  • Many of us benefit from having visual and tangible reminders in front of our faces!
  • We recognize the value of carving out time today to plan for tomorrow.
  • We make sure to check in with today’s list multiple times a day to keep us on track.

I want to dive a little deeper into a few more important characteristics of the Daily List that will help you succeed.

Realistic Time Estimates.

With one of the recent clients, we discussed realistic time estimates.

I know I have spoken about realistic time estimates in other podcast episodes and articles. It is very important to identify just how long regular tasks take. For example, I believe I take quick showers in the morning. With this article on my mind this morning, I decided to actually time my shower. And if “quick showers” means 5 minutes or so… well, it turns out I DO NOT take quick showers. Or, I take two quick showers, meaning this morning’s shower was more like 10-12 minutes.

Please don’t judge.

But this is useful information. I can use it to form my plan for my day. If someone says “Let’s go do that thing” I can say that realistically, it will take me 20 -30 minutes to get ready, instead of my optimistic (and incorrect) belief that it will take me 10 minutes.

That is just one very simple example. We all have beliefs around how long we think tasks take. Or commutes. Or cooking a meal. But if we don’t factor in the rest of the steps, or if we aren’t aware of how long things really take, we are setting ourselves up to fail.

Time Cushion and Rest.

Another characteristic of a successful Daily List is factoring in rest or at least a time cushion.

I stumble on this one all the time. The Daily List needs to have extra time factored in for transition time, or nature breaks or lunch or even a moment to step outside and breathe some fresh air. There is always more work to be done, but I will get back to it happier and more refreshed if I factor in a little extra time for rest or delays or flexibility.

Identify Routine tasks.

My clients and I also talked this week about our different types of tasks from day to day.

If you like a detailed list, there are economies we can achieve with topping our list with the 5-10 tasks we need to accomplish every day to just survive, aka. our daily routine. “Take shower, brush teeth, work out, take vitamins, eat breakfast, pack lunch”. Perhaps “make bed, start laundry, walk dog”. Basics. But for some of us, we like to cross these tasks off the list, as well, just like the work specific, family specific or other responsibilities. However, we don’t likely need to rewrite them every day. We can park them at the top of the list because they are different than our daily work today.

Priorities.

And once we have figured out how to manage those routine tasks, let’s look at prioritizing the rest of the items on the Daily List.

Maybe it’s just me, but I usually have more on my list than I can possibly get done in a day.

Again, asking you not to judge, here. I know this AND it still happens. So it is very important that at the start of every day, I review the list and determine what can feasibly happen in the time I have today, and then I put the tasks in order of importance and urgency. “Launching my new website” is super important, but will take many more hours than I have today AND no one but me is waiting for that task’s completion. Following up with clients, moving more urgent projects along, taking care of tasks that other people are relying on me to complete so they can do their work – yes, those will end up at the top of today’s list, along with realistic time estimates as to how long I expect the tasks to take.

So, to recap, perhaps you would benefit from a Daily List IN FRONT OF YOU every day. Perhaps it’s paper, perhaps it is digital. You do you. But there are characteristics that will make the Daily List and the process successful:

  • Planning ahead, like the day before, to wrap up today and look at tomorrow.
  • Checking in on the Daily List regularly.
  • Realistic Time Estimates for our regular tasks.
  • Factoring in time cushion and rest.
  • Recognizing the difference between routine tasks and the rest of your Daily List.
  • Prioritized tasks, so that the most important work gets done.

Hope this helps!

Success Requires Practice. A Lot Of Practice.

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I can’t believe I am saying this, but I recently published my 500th blog article.

That is noteworthy, at least to me. I could never have predicted, all those years ago, when I started publishing blog articles that I would have stuck with it for this long. Or I couldn’t have predicted way back when on which day, far away in the future, that I would publish my 100th, or 300th or 500th article. And, by the way, that day was April 15th, 2024.

My first blog post was on May 19, 2010.

I vacillate most days between either wanting to take down old posts that have become outdated due to technology advances or life changes for me, or wanting to leave every post up forever because they’ve become a journal or diary of sorts. I will most likely leave them be.

2010 seems a long time ago. My sons, now 19, 24 and 26, were 5.5, 10 and 12. Personally, my organizing questions then were much different than my organizing questions now. And my business has certainly grown and changed in those 14 years. Next month I will celebrate my 21st year in business. Wow.

I started my company as a mother of two small boys who wanted more flexibility in her schedule than an office job downtown could provide. Soon after, I had our third son. My company survived the economic downturn in 2008 and a global pandemic in 2020. I was doing my end of the month bookkeeping the other day, and my monthly numbers are back up to pre-pandemic levels and beyond. That is very exciting. And more importantly, I am serving and reaching more people than ever, and those numbers are truly more important that the monetary numbers any day.

But today I want to talk about the How. As in, how does one publish 500 articles in 14 years? Which averages out to 36- ish articles a year.

But to the How? With consistency and practice.

And that is where I want to go today.

You may not know this about me, or maybe you do – In addition to being a certified professional organizer, I am also a board member for my local Board of Education. And this week, I get to address our middle school National Junior Honor Society at their formal induction ceremony. When this podcast episode drops, they will have already heard this speech. They deserve to hear it first.
It’s for them.

But as I pondered today what I wanted to say to the students this week, and that in my podcast and newsletter, I wanted to share that I have hit the 500th article milestone, the two topics came together.

So, here’s my advice to our National Junior Honor Society members, and the rest of us, too, about consistency and practice.

Good evening, students, parents and special guests, staff and administrators.

Students, I am pleased to have the opportunity to speak to you this evening. Thank you, Mrs. Gibbons.

We have to practice what we hope to be.  Let’s start there.

Greatness, or success or healthy habits or athletic prowess or anything we want to achieve is not going to just happen. Sorry. But it will not just happen by accident. These accomplishments will not happen by chance, and they certainly won’t happen overnight or in an instant. Consistency and practice are key.

Now, please understand me, I love happy accidents. I love serendipitous events. Where what went into that event yielded amazing and unexpectedly awesome results! But we can’t count on those to happen. That’s what makes them accidents. So we need to work, for ourselves, on what we want to achieve. And not leave it up to chance.

Some of you may have natural talents like music or athletics or creative writing or being a great friend. Those are amazing, of course! And, we can still always improve.

You may not know this, but I sing professionally. I have been singing and playing the flute since I was in elementary school, just like some of you. And now, I get paid to do it, how cool is that? I was rehearsing over the weekend for a gig, and I was reminded that we have to practice for what we want to achieve. I needed to learn new songs and I had to practice to keep my breathing strong and to not stumble over awkward words. I put in the work so I can consistently achieve my desired results.

I also direct a choir at my church, and when we’re rehearsing together and someone makes a mistake – including me – we all brush it off and learn from it and then we move on. That’s why we rehearse, to make our mistakes and learn from them and get better, so when we perform for real, we are ready. I say that often to my choir, “That’s Why We Rehearse!”

And the more we practice, the better we’re going to get.

My challenge to you today is to make your days a practice of being good students or athletes, of being a good friend, a good human being, of being good leaders. Consistently practice being a good You.

As NJHS members, you have the opportunity to be leaders in your school community, in our Evergreen Park community and in our global community. I do, too. We have the opportunity to make our communities better, and the lives of the people in our communities better.

How amazing is that?! And we get to do that every day. That’s what leadership means, that we have the opportunity to make things better and that we should use that opportunity to do so.

National Junior Honor Society is a group of leaders. You have proven through academic achievement and service that you have the commitment, desire and consistency required to continue to be better and to help our community to be better.  

Better looks different for different people, and that’s okay. I’m not suggesting that we have be perfect. Ever. That’s ridiculous. Some days are rough, and we learn from those, too, and come back stronger from the learning. But we can always be better. Better than yesterday, but not as great as we will be tomorrow. We can always strive for better. Not perfect, not even great or good some days, but always better.

And so we have to practice consistently to make that happen.

Consistent practice towards a goal teaches us how to learn. I say to my choir that I love the professional challenge that comes with having to learn a new song.  We learn how to learn.  

Learning will never stop. It shouldn’t ever stop. 

When we stop learning, we stop growing.

We can practice learning.  We can practice being curious. We can practice being open.  We can practice appreciating others. 

Because here’s a secret. Even though we’re the leaders, we never stop learning from others. Ever. 

More over, we should seek to learn from others. 

We shouldn’t just let it happen. That’s one of those practice items, right? That’s why we rehearse. 

We should actively seek to learn from others. Actively learn. Actively practice what it is we want to achieve. Actively try to be better every day. Because we can consistently practice at being a good You and Me.

I congratulate you this evening.

I appreciate you. 

I seek to learn from you. 

I can’t wait to see what the next academic year brings and beyond. 

And I’m here with you. I can’t wait to be here with you on this journey. I’m willing to help however I can.

Thank you for your time, and congratulations.

Thanks for sticking with me to the end. I love having the opportunity to speak to our students, they are an amazing group of people. I take my responsibilities to my school district and students very seriously, and my commitment to you, my community, seriously as well. And my wish for all of us is to keep improving every day, in big and small ways, with consistent practice towards Better.

How To Not Get Distracted

A participant at a recent presentation asked me how to stay focused on her organizing projects.

She was talking about it in this context: if you’re already working on a project, how to make sure you actually stay in the space where you are working, and not get distracted and leave the space.

Or, if you do get distracted, how to make sure you come back.

I mention in my presentations that we don’t want to be butterflies when we organize. Flitting from room to room and project to project without purpose or focus. We end up in a different room, nothing has been accomplished and we’re not sure where the last few hours went!

This is a great question, and I hear this question a lot. And I know it resonated with other people attending the same presentation.

Yes, There are many strategies we can use to stay focused on our organizing projects and anchored to the space and the work. Some of these strategies can include:

  • Start the project with all of your tools and supplies with you. We can easily get distracted if we keep having to run to different parts of the house for garbage bags, a pen, tape, boxes, etc. Gather your tools and supplies first.
  • Bring in a friend and have them work with you. Perhaps you can swap organizing sessions – your closet this weekend and their closet next weekend!
    • This particular participant had attended the presentation with her sister, so I used the two of them as an example.
    • And a reminder, this is called body doubling, having a person working near you to set that example and help you stay focused.
      • That’s one of the benefits of working with an organizer, that body doubling component.
      • You can also take advantage of body doubling virtually, if you and a friend want to facetime each other while working on projects to chat and process your decision making, tell stories about items, etc.
  • Make the space enjoyable to be in. Turn on music, add a fan or a space heater, turn on the lights and open up the windows. Bring in a favorite beverage, non alcoholic, of course. Let’s do what we can to make this a more pleasant experience.
  • Make yourself some promises! Make sure you have some kind of reward planned for the end of your work session, the end of the project, etc.
  • One of my favorite strategies is to Set timers:
    • One thing that I do with my clients and myself is set a timer and tackle a project in really small bursts.
    • So I may set a timer for 20 minutes and see how much I can get done in that time until the timer goes off.
    • Sometimes I’m feeling so motivated after those first 20 minutes that I will set it for another 20 minutes and stick with it, or I will turn off the timer altogether and just say, oh, I’m doing great here. I can’t wait till I’m finished, so I’m just going to keep plugging along.

I want want to dig a little deeper today on this focus and attention question from both an organizing and also an organizational coaching perspective. Because if we often get distracted, we also have to unlearn that habit. And we need to re-learn healthier and more productive habits.

Breaking distraction habits and learning more productive ones instead is absolutely possible, but not without a plan and some strategies!

I’ll use my current situation as an example.

I started writing this content on a Sunday afternoon while I was also planning to do some batch cooking for the week. I prepped and chopped and assembled. I now have chili on the stove, simmering. I have 2 meatloaves in the crockpot. In addition, I have a rotisserie chicken from Costco that will be turned into dinner a little later. And between those three things, I will have meals for many days this week.

I like to batch-cook, and I especially love the results of cooking multiple meals at a time because it makes my life easier during the week. HOWEVER, there are days when I am cooking and I’ve been in the kitchen for a while, and all I want to do is be anywhere but in the kitchen.

I feel that very strongly sometimes. Like when it has been a lot of work, on top of a busy day. And all I want to do is be anywhere else. I want to go read a book. I want to go do something other than cook. I want to be anywhere else. But I also stop the impulse on that one because I know that sticking with the kitchen project for just a few more minutes – finishing the clean-up, putting the last few dishes in the dishwasher and wiping down the counters – is the better course of action. And then I can take a longer break, right?

Instead of responding to that misguided impulse to be anywhere else and leaving the work undone, I recognize the impulse, and I remind myself that if I stay just a few more minutes, I will be completely done instead of almost done, and I can enjoy my well earned rest a little more.

Let’s break that down.

  • Recognize the impulse, the distraction, the desire to go and do something else.
  • And stop for a minute and think it through.
    • Do I really need to be somewhere else right now, or am I just bored with this? Or, I’m tired, there are other things I also need to do, etc.

Let’s face it, there could be lots of reasons why I don’t want to be doing that project anymore, and it would be tempting to leave.

But – again – if I realize the distraction, and remind myself to stick with it just a few more minutes, I can be completely done instead of just almost done, and then I can enjoy that rest a little more, or I can go and do something else with a clear conscience.

We recognize and then examine the impulse and decide if it’s just an impulse or if it’s actually a good idea. And usually, we’re better of just sticking with the task a few more minutes, and we’ll get the job done.

I think I say this every week lately, but we start with Awareness, awareness, awareness!

Another more specific way to fight distraction and stay focused on a project is to zoom in on your task. As in, narrow your focus on the project in front of you.

I’ve been working with a new client for a few months now. Recently we were going through papers from 2015. This happens a lot, no judgement. She moved offices at work and at home and there were a number of things that were bundled up, and because there wasn’t anything truly pressing or important in there, they just kind of got shuffled aside. We came across a to-do list from years ago. She read it and then laughed and shared it with me, her organizer. And it says at the top, “declutter”.

A great idea and to-do and intention, but it’s just word on a piece of paper at that point.

My suggestion would be to get more specific on what “declutter” entails, or what “get organized” looks like. If we don’t get more specific, those things are never going to actually happen.

One way to stay to on task or focused on a project is to make your action ridiculously specific. So instead of just saying get organized or declutter, let’s try this: I want to complete some organizing projects for spring. In the first hour that I have today, I will will review my closet and dresser and my clothes. When I’m done with that, I want to re-pack the items in the furnace room that we’ve set aside for my college student to move into an apartment in the Fall. And after that, I want to review the bottom drawer of my office file cabinet and shred items from more than 4 years ago, now that our taxes are filed.

Right? So all of those items would be on the list and on the task list, but it would be far more specific than get organized or declutter.

And when we can look at big projects in terms of being a series of small projects, it makes it easier for us to stay focused on those projects so we can see results.

For example, let’s say – I’m going to organize the basement this weekend. But what if your basement is huge and a hot mess? You could say instead, “I’m going to organize the shelves in the laundry room, and then I’ll review all the old paint on the floor by the door, and then I will review the towels and toiletries in the downstairs linen closet by the bathroom.”

If we don’t narrow our focus, it’s no wonder we can get distracted. Breaking down big tasks into smaller tasks help us to feel motivated, fight the impulse to get distracted, and helps us to see results. And positive results keep us coming back!

I get the “How TO Stay On Track” question from my coaching clients as well, and some of the strategies are the same!

My coaching client may say “I want to get organized”, and I will say – awesome! But let’s get specific. What does that look like? What results do you seek? What are actions you can take every day, and how can I support you in taking them?

ZOOOOMing in, narrowing in, focusing in to stay motivated:
Does getting organized mean getting more done in your day? Switching your work and bill paying over digital and online? Figuring out your family’s schedule for the summer? Planning a trip and figuring out what that looks like for you and your family? Getting a handle on your health and wellness? Organizing the physical space in your home, of course?

Yep, we can do that. We can do all of those things, but we can’t just start with a global “OK, I want to get organized”. The first thing that we would ask in a coaching session would be to bring that into what can we accomplish in today’s session? What can we accomplish, you know, in the next 30 minutes that will help you to activate those ideas on your own, you know, in the next week or two before we speak again.

ZOOOOMing in. We can do lots of things, but we have to bring it in and we have to get specific. Because that will help us to stay motivated and anchored to the work.

When we get specific and break things down into smaller bits, it means we actually start to feel some accomplishment as we complete those smaller bits. We can track progress, we can see improvements. We can remind ourselves of our progress if we get distracted or we get off track. Um, all of those things, uh, are, again, tools to help us to stay on track, and if we get distracted, to get back on track as well.

And we can break the distraction habit and use these strategies to get back on track. Because distractions will come! But we’re bigger and better than our distractions.

“My Tree Has Leaves!” What Do You Need, To Thrive?

“My tree has leaves!”

I stood in my dining room this morning and exclaimed this excitedly out loud to absolutely no one.

I was drinking my coffee and gazing out my newly washed (over the weekend) front windows and admiring the sunshine and realized my new little tree has leaves! This is noteworthy, trust me.

You see, we had a tree in front of our house for many years. He was so beautiful in the Fall that people would stop and ask if they could pick up some of his leaves because they were so brilliantly colored.

And then, after one of those years with blight or borers, he wasn’t doing so well. We did what we could to help him out for a few years, fertilizer and extra water, etc., but his days were numbered, and eventually our village’s arborist said the tree needed to go before the tree hurt someone or someone’s car if he fell over, or infected other trees.

So we had the tree cut down. We liked having a tree in the front yard, though, so the next Spring we had another tree planted. This new tree had two seasons to thrive, but he never did. The second season, I think he had one leaf. Just one. Sadly, he, too, had to go.

We were assured that our yard and the placement and the type of tree were not the problems, that more likely that particular sapling wasn’t healthy. Fast forward to last Fall when we had another tree installed. Hope springs eternal, right? And since he was installed in the Fall after leaves fell, we had no way of knowing if he was healthy or not. But he is! And now that Spring is here, he has leaves! Now you know why I was rejoicing!

I heard a statement many months ago and it has stuck with me. It was a Facebook reel or tik-tok, and I don’t remember who said it, so if you know and can tell me, I will cite it appropriately. Here’s the quote – “Seeds aren’t lazy and neither are you.”

Meaning, if a seed doesn’t grow, we don’t say the seed is lazy. No one tells the seeds they are lazy. And if you aren’t flourishing, it’s probably not because you’re lazy. Seeds aren’t lazy and neither are you.

What is more likely is that the seed and you don’t have what is needed to thrive.

Like my original tree or my first little sapling. After my original tree was weakened, we tried to support him but he was too far gone. And my first little sapling – well, I have no idea why he didn’t thrive but we were assured that the environment we provided would support a sapling, just not that one apparently.

We can ask what a tree needs – a hospitable environment, the right climate, sunshine, water, opportunity. And patience. And then we step back and let it grow.

Sometimes, a plant can receive too much care. Yes, that is a possibility. Metaphorically and actually.

A couple summers ago, I had what I thought were fruit flies. Except – we don’t leave fruit or any other food out on the counter. And the fruit fly solutions according to the internet, like vinegar and dish soap in a jar or the cool ultraviolet fan thing I bought on Amazon, did not work. And the fruit flies were on my houseplants. So after a little more googling, I determined that the reason the anti-fruit fly solutions weren’t working was because what I thought were fruit flies were fungus gnats. Which I feel sound monumentally more disgusting. But, I digress.

The solution to the fungus gnats, by the way, was to water my plants less and also use a peppermint spray from Amazon that cleared up the gnats in a week. It turns out, you CAN care too much. I was apparently overwatering. I cared a little too much.

Taking the metaphorical leap, often we need to adjust our supports or environment to help us grow. Sometimes we don’t have what we need to thrive, either not enough or too much! And sometimes we just aren’t in the right situation.

Awareness. Awareness. Awareness.

For us to flourish, we may need to take a moment or some time to review where we are, what we need, what we don’t need, and how we will know we are flourishing. But what do we do with that statement? I always want to recommend actionable steps that we can apply this week, or whatever week you are listening to this episode!

Sticking with the plant theme, I will share that I am a joyous but indifferent gardener. I love to plant veggies and herbs and to care for them outside in the summer. I like the “getting my hands in the dirt” and “puttering in the garden” parts of gardening, they are fun and relaxing to me. I also love the “using fresh veggies and herbs from the garden in my cooking” part, I find that fun, too, and it supports my desire to eat healthy and well.

It seems that in my garden and in life, we can walk through the process for a better yield, whether that is tomatoes or priorities or productivity or whatever it is we’re looking to improve! And as I write this article, I realized that last week’s PACT goals article could have been all about gardening, too – the process and not a once-and-done event!

To review, PACT goals stand for: Purpose; Action; Continuous; and Trackable.

Let’s start with our Purpose. For example, I can say “I want to be a better gardener.” And in this example, “better” means more yield per plants.

Next, I need to determine my Actions. I can educate myself by talking to other gardeners (who actually know what they are doing!), reading books or reading up on-line. Once I know more, I could choose to plant dozens of types of vegetables this summer and hope that some of them work out. OR, I could narrow in on fewer types of vegetables and get better at those specifically. Given my small back yard, I will choose to focus on a few types of vegetables and get better at those specifically. For example, I love growing (and eating!) tomatoes but my plants didn’t produce much of anything last year. So I need to learn and take new actions!

Once I know more, I can decide and then act to water more often or less, provide more sun or less, more or less pruning, etc. I can pay attention to what other inputs or supports I can use to improve my outputs. I always use physical supports like a tomato cage, because sometimes we all need more support!

Continuous care is required for plant success. Once I know what actions to take, I need to be consistent with taking them! I will add morning gardening into my summer morning routine, to water and tend. And I will be ready to observe and adjust my regular activities, too, based on progress. And I can track the progress, like plant height, growth, number of flowers (that will turn into tomatoes later), and yield at the end of the season, to learn from the process.

Well-intentioned care, not too much and not too little, and a supportive environment will help my little sapling and my garden grow this summer. Goal setting, and PACT goals specifically, can help us flourish by determining the right supports for us and what we want to achieve, the routine and habits around implementing those supports, and how to make adjustments to be successful.

I took a walk last evening, and I noticed the two trees in front of a neighbors house have the same red-brown leaves my little leafy sapling has (I believe he is a maple). These two trees tall and full and gracious, sharing their shade and beauty with the neighborhood. That is what I want for my little tree and, metaphorically, what I want for you as well. Have a great week!

PACT: A Different Way To Set Goals

It’s a new quarter, a new season. Today, and any day, really, is a great day to check in with your progress towards your goals.

And I want to have a new and different conversation about goals today because I have a cool new concept to share!

I had to chuckle – on this morning’s accountability call, I mentioned to my partner that I was writing an article about PACT goals for today’s podcast. And… I admitted that I started it two weeks ago, and I didn’t get it done in time to record last week. Because I had a million other things to do last Monday (like, for REAL!).

Irony? That I didn’t meet a goal to write about goals because I couldn’t / didn’t dedicate the time to get it done? Yes, I think so.

As I set my goals for Q2 in April, I glanced at my goals for Q1 of 2024, and some were “once-and-done’s”. 

  • Complete the surgical procedure on my nose – done.  (Focus Area Health and Wellness)
  • Lent and Easter, liturgically with my parish and my choir – done! (Focus Area Service)
  • Attend a specific concert on March 29  – done (and it was awesome). (Focus Area Personal / Supporting Independent Art)

However, some of the goals require more of a process, and I have goals from Q1 that migrated to Q2:

  • Make progress towards coaching certification by recording coaching clients for an upcoming deadline.
  • Make progress on a major project I am working on for NAPO, the National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals.
  • Attend 12 live music / independent artist concerts in 2024 (one a month).

And I would guess, you have a similar blend of once-and-done goals and also progress goals. In past articles and podcase episodes, we have talked about SMART goals, and I LOVE a good SMART Goal!  A SMART goal is:

  • Specific,
  • Measurable,
  • Attainable,
  • Relevant and
  • Time Specific

For example, here’s a SMART goal:

“I will publish new blog articles and podcast content every week this quarter until I reach 500 posts by June 1, in celebration of my company’s 21st anniversary in June.” This is specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and has a time frame attached.

Now, how will I accomplish this goal? This is NOT a once-and-done goal or event since it will take consistent effort for the next 7 weeks to accomplish.

Last Spring, I wrote an article and recorded a podcast Episode about Metrics. 

Metrics In The Dentist Chair!

Metrics are quantifiable items we can measure, to determine progress. Achieving our goal is amazing!  Success is grand, for sure. But it is also an event.  It is a snapshot moment – goal achieved!  Done!  But more often, the work continues.

To make the goals and the work happen, from day to day, we need to bring the waypoints closer in.  We need manageable portions to bite off on a daily or weekly basis in addition to that one big goal we will accomplish at the end of a predetermined amount of time.

Enter – PACT goals. PACT goals are the tool within a tool, the intentional and incremental goals within a big, lofty SMART goal. Per Julie Simpson on Hire.com, “What are PACT Goals? The Lesser-Known Technique to Set Smarter Goals”, PACT “is a goal-setting technique that focuses on output rather than the outcome”.

PACT stands for

  • Purpose,
  • Actions,
  • Continuous and
  • Trackable.

It seems then, that often, the journey is the point.

Sometimes we need to set PACT goals to give us the support to meet our SMART goals. And sometimes we need to use PACT goals to create better habits for forever.

Let’s break this down! Purpose. Actions. Continuous and Trackable. I like the idea of continuous movement towards our goals. Let’s use my Publication Goal above as an example.

The question of “Purpose” is important for setting goals. We want to know that we are achieving what we want to achieve. That just makes sense. We want to know our purpose and we want to be purposeful (think “intentional”). And once we figure out what we are awesome at and what we are meant to do in life, as in what we want to do intentionally with our time in small and large pieces, then that’s our purpose.

When we set purposeful goals, we want to know that what we’re seeking to achieve aligns with who we are, what we want in life, etc.. And publishing high quality and supportive content for my community definitely aligns with my professional goals.

At a class last week, I heard the nicest feedback! A participant said ” You bring such positive energy!”. Yep, that’s the plan! And when it comes to our goals, we want to be purposeful, we want to be intentional, and to know that the goal that we are setting fits into the context of who we are and what we want in life.

And since success towards my publishing goal is not something I can just knock out the day before my June 1 deadline, I need to be intentional on how I spend my time in the next 7 weeks. I need to PURPOSEFUL in my actions.

And, on to Action! Action, because we’re talking about goal setting here, right? We’re talking about making progress. We’re talking about moving forward. All of those words are active words.

Progress requires action almost all the time. What are the actions that we need to take to move us towards our PACT goals? Working towards the publication goal, my actions have included in the last week spending 30 minutes each day on the project:

  • Review my voice memos on my phone, rename them and send them as an attachment to my email.
  • Upload to the transcription service that I use and have all the unpublished memos transcribed.
  • Match up all the voice memos / transcriptions with my list of published articles and podcast topics, and delete any duplicates.
  • Add the unpublished topics to my editorial content calendar.

And now that I know what I want to write about and publish, I will carve out an hour on the calendar 3 – 4 days a week for writing / editing.

And, since PACT goals need to be trackable, every one of those steps I listed above is trackable with metrics. I went from 30 voice memos down to 10. I went from 45 transcriptions down to 11. I increased, after deleting many duplicate topics, from 20 to 35 topics on my editorial calendar. And now I can track “writing minutes” weekly as progress towards the goal. Action.

Next up, and forever – Continuous.

Purpose and Actions are easy to see, but I think what sets PACT goals apart are the Continuous and Trackable aspects.

Let’s talk about continuous and trackable. Using as an example, my goal of publication by June 1. I’ve set my intentions, I have determined my actions. Now I need to do them! What would continuous progress look like towards my goal look like? I can determine that, and then make the progress towards that goal. And beyond, of course, because I have a waypoint, a milestone in mind, but I certainly won’t stop writing after the June 1 deadline.

I need to take action every day or multiple times a week. Continuous might not mean every minute of every day, but it certainly will mean regular consistent, continuous progress towards the goal.

Perhaps a wellness goal is a good example, too – 30 minutes of cardio 5 times a week is purposeful, continuous and trackable action, and a habit that will help you for life. As I mentioned earlier, sometimes the journey is the point.

Finally, let’s talk “Trackable”.

How do we make progress happen? How do we measure progress and not just “I’m feeling better about the process” or “I am less stressed with writing”, or “I am having more fun”.

“Progress” is sometimes difficult to quantify. But when we determine our purpose and actions, and the interval which makes them continuous, we can track progress. In my example, I can track articles published, words written, minutes or hours worth of writing or editing, engagement with my readers by number of likes or shares, etc. These are trackable items. Which also means, I can track improvements from week to week by paying attention to trends in the tracking.

How far have you come? What have you accomplished so far? Reviewing your tracking, what can you do to improve the process?

In addition to catching up on my writing process, which is what my actions in the past week were about, I can also track my progress moving forward. I have re-set my content process and will continue with these new strategies for a few weeks. And then I can look and see if my output has improved over that time. If it has – yeah! If it has not, I probably need to review and adjust my strategies.

To Review:

Setting PACT goals is a strategy that focuses on the process and not just the end product. We can use PACT goals with SMART goals, as the support to accomplish our SMART goals. OR we can use PACT goals as a method of continuous improvement. PACT stands for Purpose, Action, Continuous and Trackable, and can be used to help us focus on the process of progress and not just the event of achieving a goal.

I hope you found this helpful. If you would like to comment, please share with me on social media or drop me an email at colleen@peaceofmindpo.com, or drop me a DM on one of my social media platforms. I can’t wait to hear about how PACT goals helped you move forward.

Time Management Is Stress Management

Have I mentioned? I have this great opportunity multiple times a year.  I teach time and stress management to students in the Highway Construction Careers Training Program, or HCCTP, at two different community colleges in the area.

Let me trace it back. Here’s a reminder that we never know how far our ripples will reach. I owe this opportunity to connections that I made in a professional speaker’s group over 10 years ago now.

And I have to laugh, because there’s so many people that I’m still connected with to this day through that speaker’s group, even though the group disbanded a few years ago. Still connections, friends, network partners, whatever you want to call them, that I met in that professional speaking group.  Many industries were represented, what brought us together was professional speaking.

There was a nutritionist, an insurance broker who I’m still friends with today and who also has a podcast on the Broadcast Basement network.  There was a financial planner who does financial planning presentations, and I’m still connected to him to this day. A friend and network partner who interviewed me on her YouTube channel last Spring, Sabrina Schottenhammel, is a massage therapist and professional speaker and wellness advocate.  And a friend and network partner, Alexandra Glumac, is affiliated with South Suburban College and she is why I started teaching this program, long ago and far away!

I teach time and stress management to the HCCTP hosted at South Suburban College, the Oak Forest campus. They have 4 or 5 groups of students through the program every year.  And because of my experience at South Suburban College, I also teach for a similar program at Kankakee Community College. I get to teach awesome groups of people about time management and stress management.   I started to write today’s episode and article content as I parted ways with Class number 32 last week.  I told them I would give them a shout out.  So, hey, Class 32!  It was great to meet you all!

I started teaching this course around Class number 3 or 4. These groups are in class for 12 weeks, and I speak to them on time management and stress management in their first week of class.  That makes a lot of sense, because by being brave and taking on this coursework, they need time and stress management to make their lives work in the midst of this extra busy time.

And I’m going to be completely transparent.  The stress management is more stressful for me. I know that’s weird, but it’s the truth. Time management is productivity, and hey – that is where I live. That is my jam. That’s what I do. Productivity. Yep. Sign me up. I could talk to you for hours about productivity.  And I probably have, over time.

But the 4 hours of stress management content is newer for this group.  I have only done that 3 or 4 times.  And I’m still trying to get the best right combination of content. My goal is to not stress people out with a lot of work while making sure my participants have the tools they need to succeed.  That is my goal for these groups every time I meet them, to give them tools in their life. And I love that!  I have the coolest job.  And I meet the coolest people. Class 32 challenged me. When they found out I had a podcast, they wanted an episode dedicated just to them.

And here we are.  I can absolutely do that.

We tackled both time management and stress management last week.  And here is the secret, right here.  This is what guides my practices. I feel that so many of the practices that we use in time management are also useful for stress management.

When we feel out of control, unproductive, out of sorts, you know, maxed out because we’re always late, or we never feel like we have enough time to do what we need to do or what we want to do. We don’t feel like we’re making time for the people in our lives. We don’t feel like we’re making time for ourselves.  These are all very stressful situations. And did you hear the words that I said in those statements? Time. Time.

Here’s the premise for today.  I will declare that time management is positively and irrevocably entwined with stress management and stress reduction. Making sure that we’re doing right by that is going to help everything else go better.

If we can get clear on what we want to accomplish in the course of our day and then make it happen, yes, it’s a management of time, but that also decreases our stress levels. We can recognize that and we can work with it.

Here is what our agendas looked like.  In our time management workshops, we begin talking about routines and how our routines can support the things that we need to, to make sure our needs are met in a consistent and regular way. And I’ve talked about routines in other episodes.

In class, we discuss sleep hygiene. Sleep hygiene is the routine we have around getting good sleep.  And we know getting good sleep increases overall health and decreases stress.

We watch a couple cheesy videos from early 2000s on productivity, and talk about priorities and planning and goal setting. We look at Priorities and the Eisenhower box, which I know that I have done an episode before about, I’ve always liked that tool. It’s such a great tool. Because knowing we’re working on what is important decreases stress and increases life satisfaction.

In our time together, because these are students in a highway construction careers training program, we talk about project management. I don’t always talk about project management, it’s a very specific need. These folks are going to be working on projects, though, so we take a first glance at project management to get a feel for how they fit into the bigger picture on a project.

Finally, in time management, we talk through procrastination. Because conquering that delay-for-no-good-reason increases productivity and decreases stress.

The next day, in the stress management component, we talked more about routines. We also talked about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs because we need to be able to identify needs so we can ensure they are consistently met. Because otherwise we get stressed! It is stressful when needs are not met. Physical, safety, psychological, esteem, etc. 

This week, I also shared learning styles with this group.   Learning styles were the topic of last week’s episode. I like the stress management content that I wrote because it is all about the person.  The individual.  There were so many really cool aha ah moments.

We were talking about learning styles, and I mentioned that some of us think in pictures, and some of us think in words, and some of us think in commercials or scenes.  That some of us read the words in front of us, and some of us actually sound the words out in our head when we read.

Just knowing that there’s a difference is so important. A lot of our stress management was talking about awareness.  Self-awareness. Awareness of how we are showing up in the moment.  In coaching, awareness is the first goal.

We talked a lot about that in stress management. We talk about physical awareness.  Like physical needs, and also, you know, awareness of where our stress is in our body. For example, if I’m stressed, my face flushes and my shoulders get tense.  If we know what stress feels like, we can identify it more readily and take steps to decrease it for our own wellness.  I really love that, that physical awareness, that physical scanning of ourselves.

Apparently I do it a lot because a couple of my class participants noted “yeah, you do that all the time”.  I didn’t realize anybody else noticed that, but that’s okay.

Along the lines of checking in physically for stress management, we also practiced square breathing both days. Because to be honest, square breathing is a tool I use EVERY DAY.  If you’re not familiar, it’s a breathing technique where we breathe in for 4 beats, hold the breath for 4 breaths, exhale for 4 breaths and hold the exhale for 4 breaths.  That’s it.  Don’t push it, don’t rush it, don’t make it unnatural.  Just focus on your breathing for 5 – 7 cyles of square breathing.  A 90 second vacation.  It’s lovely. 

So, to recap:

It is great to teach these group, and Class 32, it was lovely to meet you.

Time and stress management are related.  If we can get a handle on our time as a limited and valuable resource, if we can do better with our time management, that will absolutely help us with our stress management as well.

When we better manage our routines, priorities, projects, procrastination, goals, bodies and wellness and sleep and breath – stress goes down.

So those are all time management things. But it sounds a lot like stress management to me, too, right? Time management is also stress management.

I’ll never say we can be stress free. And stress isn’t always bad.  Some stress helps us to perform better.  My concern about teaching Stress Management meant that the night before the class, I made sure to check my bag and make sure that I had everything I needed to teach the group today. It was the elevated stress that helped me to be a better teacher today and to work with my group better. That’s good stress.

But long term stress can cause mental and physical problems.  The nagging, long term, you know, heavy weight of stress sometimes that can absolutely cause us trouble. And again, in transparency, I have been in a very stressful season personally and I really need to rev up my self care. So when life gets more stressful, I know it doesn’t make sense, but we actually need to do more to care for ourselves than we normally would because the demands are so much greater on us. And again, I think I need to say that out loud to myself as well.

In stressful times, we need to do more to care for ourselves because the demands are so much greater on our systems, psychological system, physical system, whatever that looks like. Getting good at time management decreases stress. Yes, let’s do that!

How Does Your Brain Work? Learning Styles

Learning Styles: Does This Sound Like You?

  • “I’m more of a visual person.”
  • “I really need to talk some things out.”
  • “If I hear a song once, I remember the words.”
  • “I’m more of a hands-on person.”
  • “If I drive to your house once, I will always remember how to get there.”

Yes, yes and yes!

Today, let’s talk about learning styles. In coaching, we call them processing modalities. I am going to use the terms “learning styles” and “modalities” interchangeably.  Our processing modalities are how OUR brain best deals with information.  These learning styles are part of what makes you you, but they are not character or personality traits. They are the paths your brain uses to process and cement information and turn it into something useful for you.

The most common ones, or at least the ones we will talk about today, are

  • Visual,
  • Auditory,
  • Verbal and
  • Kinesthetic (and relatedly, Tactile).

Simply put, visual processors learn by seeing, auditory learners learn by hearing, verbal learners learn by speaking, and kinesthetic and tactile processors learn by doing.

It is helpful for us to understand that there are learning styles, that everyone is a blend of learning styles – you and me and everyone else that you interact with – and how to support our blend and the blend of the people we interact with.  Knowing you are a blend, and I am a blend, and that every other person in your life is their own blend of learning styles gets us closer to awareness, acceptance and understanding.

An important thing to remember is that you have options. Options on how to support your own learning styles, and options on how to manage yourself with other people whose learning style is different than yours.

When you think of a traditional classroom, consider all the ways the teachers engage multiple learning styles.  We read aloud, or listen to the teacher or other students read aloud, or we may listen to a recording.  We may use our hands and use manipulatives in math, or word cards on our desk in ELA. We write our own notes, we look at things around the room or on the board, we might move around to stations or act out a scene from literature or history.  There are many ways to reinforce learning styles.

We all possess all of the learning styles, but we each our own special blend of strengths.  The styles or modalities show up differently in each of us at times, too. When he was little, I thought one of my sons was being difficult because we didn’t see things the same way.  And the answer is, we absolutely DID NOT see the things the same way.  And, that’s ok. 

When we talked it through, he and I discovered that he is a visual learner and that when I told him to go in and clean his room, he saw everything in his room as one thing, one composite item.  He would get overwhelmed.  It was difficult for him to break down the big composite item into smaller pieces of the room, like making his bed, then putting the laundry on the floor into the hamper and hanging up his baseball cap.  Once we figured out that we literally didn’t see things the same way, we figured out how I could change my language and he could change how he looked at things and then we started to communicate better.

Now that we know that there are learning styles, and that we all have our own strengths in those learning styles, let’s look at how we can use that knowledge to navigate our life.

I will use myself as a case study:

I am strong in multiple modalities, which is quite common.  One of my strengths is auditory learning. I am a really good listener, which serves me well in my role as an organizational coach and musician. And, that can also be a problem because I get stressed out with prolonged or chaotic loud noise. I LOVE and I mean LOVE a good concert, either seated in plushy seats listening to a full orchestra but more so, in a bar listening to one of our favorite bands.  AND, though I love the concert, I’m also somewhat relieved to walk outside in relative quiet to let my brain process all of the awesome new input I just experienced.  Both can be true.

I am also a professional speaker and singer.  Not surprisingly, I am a strong verbal learner. For myself, I know that I benefit from talking through challenges and ideas, and very often I gain awareness when I hear myself say something out loud. And I can get to a point some days that I am talked out.  I am a verbal learner, but I dislike talking on the phone. I would rather speak in person. I am aware of my learning styles, how they show up for me, how to manage me and what tools I can use as I go through my day.

So, let’s look at the specific learning styles.

A visual processor:

  • learns by seeing, or imagining something in their mind;
  • recognizes patterns;
  • appreciates aesthetics; and
  • appreciates visual representations like graphs or pictures.
  • Ways to work as a visual processor:
    • use color to indicate category or priority, in our homes or professional life;
    • use highlighters or fun colors of ink in writing;
    • make a good list or map of things, take pictures of things to help you remember;
    • be purposeful in the physical arrangement of space; and
    • become aware that we are impacted by visual stimuli.
    • For example, to support my visual learning, I request communications in text or email form so that I can refer back to it if I need reminders.
  • Times it can get in the way:
    • one visual learner may want to see everything all the time and doesn’t put things away;
    • another visual learner may get distracted or overwhelmed by seeing everything, and we need to put it away behind a closed door; and
    • for some visual learners, if they don’t see something, it ceases to exist for them.

An auditory learner:

  • learns by listening, hearing and even reading (we often hear the words in our head);
  • remembers things by how they sound, or what they were hearing when they learned it;
  • may hum or talk to themselves or others; and
  • may learn ideas while listening to favorite music, instrumental music, white noise or other noisescapes, or silence, depending on the person.
  • Ways to work with it:
    • learn new material by reading flashcards, directions, stories or assignments out loud;
    • record yourself spelling words or working through new content, and then listen to the recording;
    • use mantras or repeated phrases to reinforce an idea or learning; and
    • listen to podcasts, or use recordings, books on tape, or having test questions read to you out loud to help you study.
  • Times it can get in the way:
    • auditory learners rely heavily on hearing, but can also become overwhelmed with loud, chaotic, off-key or repetitious sounds; and
    • as with all learning styles, age and health can have an impact, for example, our hearing acuity changes with age, so we need to get our hearing checked regularly.

A verbal learner:

  • learns by speaking and expressing themselves, by “talking it out”;
  • is often strong in written communications, too, and reading and writing; and
  • is often strong with auditory learning.
  • Ways to work with it:
    • many of the tools with an auditory learner works with a verbal learner, too, as we are doing the reading of the materials; or
    • learn new material by reading flashcards, directions, stories or assignments out loud;
    • For example, I often “write” my articles while I commute or travel.  I open the Voice Memo app on my Iphone, and record my article, then use a transcription website to turn it into text. And at rehearsal the other night, I used the voice record to text option to send a text for follow up, and this sparked a conversation among my choir members.
  • Times it can get in the way:
    • as I mentioned in my case study, verbal learners can get talked out; and
    • verbal learners may speak too much, disrupting themselves and others.

Kinesthetic and tactile leaners:

  • learn by touching, doing, moving, building or drawing.
  • Kinesthetic learners use major muscle groups and gross motor skills;
  • tactile learners work more with fine motor skills and their hands;
  • learn best when there is some sort of movement involved with the experience;
  • learn by taking things apart and putting them back together; and
  • communicate with your whole body, physically and by touch.
  • Ways to work with it:
    • floor plans, maps;
    • factor in activity, gravitate towards sports or careers that incorporate movement;
    • physically manipulate learning tools like flash cards into categories, topics, etc.;
    • accept gum chewing, fidgeting, tinkering and taking physical breaks;
    • do hands-on activities that involve touching, building, moving, acting or drawing; or
    • offer to be the note taker in a group setting, to use the activity to keep your mind engaged.
  • Times it can get in the way:
    • a K or T learner may struggle if and when they are physically fatigued, injured or sore, or if space does not permit movement;
    • it is difficult to sit still and you may need to take frequent breaks;
    • fidgeting and movement may be mis-construed as lack of focus or impulse control in a traditional class room setting.

I could write forever about learning styles, but this is a good place to start.

Consider the different learning styles mentioned, and reflect on which one or ones resonate with you the most. Consider some of the tips suggested to help you in your day-to-day experiences. And take an active interest in the learning styles of the people around you as well, to foster communication and support!

P.S. I write this with gratitude to Denslow Brown with Coach Approach for Organizers, https://coachapproachtraining.com/, where I first learned about learning styles and processing modalities.