Category: Productivity

Who’s On The Team? (Wellness Edition)

1 Comment

Who is on the team?

I’m going to be real and honest this week.  Well, I’m always real and honest, but I am going to talk about things that are a little uncomfortable to talk about because… well… sometimes we need to do the uncomfortable things.

Because they’re the right things to do, even if they’re uncomfortable.

Before we go too far today, I want to start with the end in mind:

  • We need to de-mystify medical issues, wellness and prevention, and we need to talk about stuff.
  • I’m fine. 
  • I am very appreciative of my team, of knowing that I am not alone and that I have very smart people I can call.
  • We need to pursue prevention and wellness in positive terms.
  • I am encouraging all of us this week to map out our plan and make our appointments for 2024.

I am happy to say, I took care of all the recommended wellness screenings and vaccinations for my age group in 2023.  Before you think I’m bragging, trust me – I’m not.  In full transparency, I received my results from the test I took instead of having a colonoscopy on December 28.  So to say I took care of them in 2023… well, I just squeaked that last test into 2023.

The question I want to ask us today is “Who is On The Team?” And let’s think of them as a team, as people who are smarter than us in certain areas and who are here to help us.

This week, that is in health care terms. Here’s the story:

It’s Spring, 2020. I had created a great team, I thought, over the last 20 years with a gynecological practice and primary care practice in the same clinical building.  And then… just as I really needed them in 2020, my gynecologist who delivered all three children retired, the clinical building closed and all the doctors left with no follow up for over 3 months.

Because of that experience, I realize just how important it is to have A Team. And to think of wellness and prevention in positive terms.

I’m always on track with my annual gynecological exams and my mammogram. I struggled with medical issues starting in the summer of 2020 that culminated with a major gynecological surgery in February of 2021, so staying on top of those issues is more important to me than ever and I never miss a year.

However, because I had done so much medical stuff in the 6 months leading up to that surgery, I did not get an annual general physical exam or lab work, etc., in 2022. 

But, I understand the importance of regular screenings and preventive medicine.  I encourage all of us to understand that and to make time NOW to take care of ourselves to save time and heartache later.  So in 2023 I re-committed to prevention and re-examined my team.

I made the calls that needed to be made, I made the appointments, I did the work.  Did I like all of it?  No.  Did I do it anyway?  Yes.  Because, like in organizing, maintenance in wellness is where is the secret and foundation to success.

In 2023, I had not yet had a colonoscopy, even though recent changes to the recommendations tell us that we should start getting those at 45 years old, and let’s face it, I am more than 45 years old. And as my otherwise totally chill and relaxed gynecologist said very strongly at my appointment with her in July, there are worse things than getting a colonoscopy – Like GETTING COLON CANCER. 

In truth, I wasn’t actually worried about getting a colonoscopy.  My hurdles were navigating our insurance, setting aside 2 days to schedule the prep and exam, not wanting to bother anyone with needing to drive me, etc. So, at my annual physical in November, my primary care doctor mentioned Cologuard, a test I could do at home and then send in, and I thought that sounded like a great idea.  (And it still took me a few weeks to do it, after I got the kit!) The “everything looks good, you have 3 years until you have to do it again” were the results I received on December 28.

I am taking a while to get around to what I really want to talk about today.  I added another member to the team recently.  For much of 2023, I had a spot on the right side of my nose that just wouldn’t heal.  It would almost heal, and then I would wake up and it would be bleeding again. 

I am a fair-skinned Irish girl. I have worn SPF 35 or more every day for 23 years. I have two colors – white and red.  There is not much in-between for me.  I have family members who have had skin cancer.  I knew I needed to make the call.  I hesitated for a while because my son was getting married in late September, and I didn’t want to have surgery before that.  It isn’t reasonable, of course, to think this way, but it is what I thought.

So, right after the wedding, I made the appointment for a skin screening, and that screen occurred the first week of November.  They completed a thorough skin screening and took a biopsy of the spot on my nose.  This may sound strange, but even though the dermatologist was also concerned about the spot on my nose, I left the office that day feeling so relieved, knowing that except for that spot, the rest of my skin looked good and healthy. 

I received the results the week after Thanksgiving, that I have a basal cell carcinoma on my nose and it needs to be removed. Let me assure you, this is the blandest, least concerning type of skin cancer there is and I am perfectly fine.  You can google it, if you’d like, goodness knows I did.  And now, I have a Mohs procedure (you can google that, as well) scheduled in two weeks to remove the spot.

Did I want to have the dermatologist appointment?  No.  Did I want to have the screening? No, because I was worried about what they would find. Again, not logical thinking, I know, but that was my thinking nonetheless. And because I was worried, it was EVEN MORE IMPORTANT TO MAKE IT HAPPEN.

What’s really interesting is that now that I have to take a few weeks off around the procedure for recovery and have spoken to clients, friends and peers about scheduling, I have heard just how common this procedure is. Thirty percent of fair skinned people will have it in their life time. As soon as I mentioned that I have to do this, I learned that many people I know have already had this procedure. Which goes back to the the statement – we need to de-mystify medical conditions and talk about stuff more openly.

Which is what I am doing today.

So, back to the original question.

Who’s on the team?

  • My chiropractor, my massage therapist and my nutrition response testing provider (all at the same office), and I probably see them the most often;
  • dermatology practice;
  • gynecologist practice;
  • eye doctor (just had my 6 month check-up this past week);
  • my primary care doctor; and
  • my dentist.
  • I’ve also worked with and can call on them again – a nutritionist, a healer, a physical therapist, an oriental medicine practitioner and acupuncturist, and a therapist.
  • More importantly, who needs to be on your team? What are the recommended tests and screening for people your age? If you haven’t already scheduled those for 2024, may I gently suggest you give those some thought this week?

So, let’s review.

  • We need to de-mystify medical and wellness and prevention, and we need to talk about stuff.
  • We need to examine the excuses we tell ourselves, because sometimes those stories are wrong.
  • I’m fine. 
  • I am very appreciative of my team, of knowing that I am not alone, of knowing I have very smart people I can call, and of thinking about prevention and wellness in positive terms.
  • And I am encouraging all of us this week to map out our plan and make our appointments for 2024.

What does that look like for you?

Using the terminology from last week’s podcast and article, start with the easy and the obvious.

Schedule your dentist appointments, your eye doctor appointment, your annual physical. You don’t have to complete them right now, but please, get them on the calendar for some time in 2024. And if doing that all at once feels overwhelming, place a reminder on the first day of each month to call one office and make one appointment. Or, make that note for your birthday of the month – meaning, for me, the 7th of every month could be wellness day. I always use my birthday in the Fall as a reminder to get my flu shot.

If you don’t know what the recommended screenings are for your age group, ask your primary care provider or google it. Have the uncomfortable conversations, make the tough phone calls. Be the leader of your wellness team and make your plan!

To paraphrase the words of my doctor last summer, what’s worse than the screenings and vaccines to prevent illness? Actually having the illness! Mobilize that team!

Start With The Easy and Obvious. Just Start.

2 Comments

Let’s Start with Starting. 

Some days, our most important word is “start”.

I received a text from a client this week. She is delightful. I work with the most amazing people.

She is an in-person organizing client.  We were scheduled to work together later that day, and she was thinking through her project list and what she wanted to accomplish that day. She has a few high priority projects and determining where specifically we needed to spend our time since we would not be able to accomplish all the projects in the time we had scheduled. She didn’t know if we should start on putting away the Christmas decoration bins or start on the basement storage space or start on the clean and dirty laundry in the primary bedroom and walk-in closet.

And, of course, this is a great question to ask. Where to spend our time? But more importantly, of course, is that all of those options start with the word start. Because if we want to make progress in any direction we have to start. 

In this case, we started with the easy and the obvious, with the big project RIGHT IN FRONT OF US, which was laundry.

If you also wonder where to start on your organizing projects, here is the answer:

  • Start with the easy and the obvious.
  • Start with a project that is small.
  • Start with a project that is completely straightforward and un-emotional.
  • Start with the project that you’ve already made progress on or is almost done.
  • Start with the obvious. If you want to organize your kitchen today, load up the dishwasher and clean out the sink first before you open one cabinet or drawer. 
  • Start with the easy.  Take out all the trash and recycling.  Those are already-made decisions and getting that all out the door can jump start our motivation.
  • Start with what is on the floor in front of you, because that will make taking a next step easier.
  • Of course, You can always start with the hard and intimidating, too, but that is a topic for another article!

Just so you know, this article is not just about physical organizing.

My organizing work also utilizes the skills I’ve learned in coaching because in the best organizing sessions, the conversation stays solidly with the client, the client gains awareness, we utilize clear communication and powerful questions, and we set my client up to continue to succeed.

This client texted me that she was overwhelmed. She had small children home this week due to the cold and snow here in Chicago. The holidays wrapped up less than a month ago.  January activities are in full swing. I say all of this because, hey, who among us hasn’t felt overwhelmed?

She was asking for guidance around prioritizing work and projects.  She is clear on what her projects are but was sorting out where was the best place to start.  She was crafting her plan for our time together based on needs (hooray!!!).  And for our purposes that day, the answer was Start with the Easy and the Obvious.

So regardless of if we’re working on organizing a bedroom or in coaching, setting our professional goals for 2024, the process and questions are similar!

We determine needs – in my client’s example, the needs were physical spaces that needed to be organized, for better functioning of her home and therefore some peace of mind. 

Next, how do we prioritize? What shall we do, first , second, third, etc.? Let’s make sure that what we’re working on, in organizing or in coaching, is important. That it will move us towards our goals, will improve our lives. Let’s think it through.

For this client, we could look at our three options, Christmas bins, storage space or clothes, and we could acknowledge that all three were important but taking care of the clothes and laundry would help immediately.  So, we started with the Easy and the Obvious right in front of us.

And once we know what to do and when, let’s actually make the work happen.

SO THEN WE START.  And the twist here is that STARTing is the easy and obvious step to take.

My client started the work when we set the appointment for this week a month ago. 

She started the work when she reached out to me earlier in the day to tell me that she was overwhelmed but still willing to work.

She started the work when she texted me to talk through priorities.

And when I got to her house, after we talked through things a little bit longer, we DOVE IN and made great progress on the clothes / laundry / bedroom project.

If you, too, are wondering where to start on your organizing projects, let’s review.

  • Start with the easy and the obvious.
  • Start with a project that is small or impersonal or already started or almost complete.
  • Start with what is right in front of you.
  • Just start.

What does that look like for you this week?  Sure, this has been about an organizing project, but let’s ask the question about you personally.

What is easy and obvious? What simple things can you change to make things better in 2024? 

  • Want to eat healthier?  Bring home healthy foods.
  • More exercise or movement?  Every time that idea occurs to you, stand up and move around your space.
  • Improve your relationships? Text a friend.
  • Better sleep in 2024? Got to bed.  No really.

Start.  Just start.

Everything? Sure, But Not All At Once!

I was chatting with one of my Finish Line Friday participants last week before everyone else arrived in my zoom room. Not surprisingly, we were talking about goal setting for the new year. I said out loud, as a reminder to her and to me, that “2024 is 12 Months Long.”

Meaning, we have a lot of time and opportunity to make positive change and we don’t have to stuff everything into the first week.

And that really resonated with her.

Because, of course, every year is 12 months long. January, even when we try to pack all sorts of new habits and change in, is 31 days long. No more, no less.

Some years, we start out strong and believe that we need to change EVERYTHING ALL AT ONCE when the new year begins. And we set our selves up for failure or major anxiety when we think that way. Instead, let’s consider pacing ourselves.

On the other hand, I had grand plans for EVERYTHING at once when it comes to strategic planning in January.

6 weeks ago, I made sure to block out time on the calendar last week and this week for hours of strategic planning time to work on my editorial calendar, get ahead on my writing and plan my year in detail. And… as is often the case when it comes to big-picture strategic planning, more urgent issues squeezed into the space instead.

This is not to say that I am not planning strategically for the year this week. It IS to say, that I am using smaller pieces of time to do the planning. And as an aside, I will block MORE time at the end of 2024 and beginning of 2025 to ensure some sacred space for planning!

The balance seems to be, then – Everything? Sure. But NOT ALL AT ONCE!

Here goes – this week, I am working on the Qs.

I use a Bullet Journal. I have mentioned it in past podcasts and videos, but I haven’t delved too deeply. And I feel that it is time to delve deeply!

And one of the features for the Bullet Journal is called a Future Log. As we set up our Bullet Journals, we start with a few index pages (a topic for another day), and then we set up our Future Log.

I, like many others, break my year into quarters. Quarter 1 is January, February and March, Quarter 2 is April, May and June, etc.

This year on my future log so far, I have:

  • Q1, a procedure in February
  • Q1, coaching certification to complete by March 1
  • Q1, Liturgy planning for Easter on March 31
  • Q2, a wedding in Maryland
  • Q3, family vacation
  • Q3, moving my son to his college apartment
  • Q3, a trip to Massachusetts

There are also doctor appointments, presentations, client appointments and board meetings on the calendar for 2024. But those are typical items and don’t need to be in the Future Log. The Future Log and the Qs are for tracking big projects.

Working with quarters helps my brain every day.

Some of us stumble into all or nothing thinking, and that sort of thinking can disrupt our reason, our logic, our productivity and our peace.

With the Q’s and the future log, I have a consistent and reliable place to park ideas that are AMAZING but that do not need to be worked into today’s plan or this week’s, or even this month.

Yesterday, I had a meeting with my social media manager. We are working on a big launch for Q1, but then she asked (without knowing what this week’s topic was going to be) if we could look at Q2 and beyond as well. YES!!

We don’t want to lose track of the good ideas we have, but now or even this quarter may not be the time to tackle them.

I have a big project for a professional organization I am affiliated with that will take time in Q1 and Q2, so any other big projects will need to be planned for Q3 or Q4.

I also look back at last year’s Q’s, the plan for each quarter and also the list of things I completed. And I can learn from that, as I plot my Qs for this year as I look ahead. For example,

  • Last year, especially in the second and third quarters, I was helping my mom downsize and move to her new very cute apartment. I will not need to do that this year, as she is already settled. More importantly, my son and his wife got married the end of September! Amazing, but also not something I need to plan for again this year!
  • On the other hand, also 3rd quarter last year, we spent a lot of time with one of my sons and his friends at the lake, and that was awesome, so I should make note now on my planning for July to spend weekends with them, if they’d like.

We can zoom out from the day-to-day or even week-to-week planning, and look at our year in broader strokes or as a bigger picture. We can pair up what we want to accomplish this year with the time that we have available. We can cut ourselves some slack and recognize that we can accomplish great things AND not wear ourselves out and doom our goals before we even begin by pacing our work and our energy for the longer term.

We can let our ideas flourish by giving them a resting place until we are ready to act on them.

Consider your 2024 Qs this week and this month, and set yourself up to succeed in 2024!

Let’s Get To Know “Time Blocking”

I am writing this content on December 26th to be published the first week of January.

I have high hopes for getting some tasks done today while also staying in my jammies and eating Christmas cookies. ( So far so good.)

At 6:30 am, I opened up my laptop and my task-list, after a very busy 4 days of wonderful Christmas revelry. 

Those days really were wonderful.  We celebrated with friends and family in multiple states.  I am so blessed.  I have so many amazing people in my life.  So very blessed.

And now, today I need to make progress on some neglected tasks.  Two professional tasks specifically, writing this podcast content and working the infrastructure for my subscription service. I need to send out emails for two different ministries that I run, and I need to get my house back to normal before more houseguests arrive tomorrow.

At 6:30 am with my first cup of coffee, I had identified those are my Focus Areas today. Then, I looked at my schedule for the day. I realized that with the people sleeping in my house right now, that house tasks and making noise should probably be an afternoon and evening endeavor.

I need to head to the grocery or place a grocery order, but that entails tidying the fridge and freezer and asking questions of the still sleeping family members, so this too is relegated until after noon.

The professional tasks are more time specific anyway, with two appointments with my assistant and my podcast producer this morning.

I looked at the transcription service that I use to turn my road-trip recordings into text so that I can edit it and publish articles.  And it isn’t working.  And I was less than excited about the topic I had chosen for today anyway.

So when I checked in on my editorial content calendar, I re-committed to my plan to talk about Tools in the Productivity Tool Box in January. 

And I moved my meeting with my social media guru to tomorrow to focus on writing podcast content this morning.

In doing all of those things, realized, that since I am using Time Blocking to make things happen for myself today, I should write about it for all of us!

Time Blocking = Batch Work = Time Chunking

Time Blocking is looking at the time we have in our day and our week not as just a blank white canvas, but instead, as opportunity divvied up into bite size pieces.

It is assigning important work that needs done today and this week to the time we have, instead of hoping that we can cram it all in without a plan to make that happen. It lets our brain work on one topic or category at a time. Because, my friend, multi-tasking is a myth. 

All projects are comprised of a series of smaller projects.

I can realize some flow and economies of scale when I work on similar tasks at the same time.  When I work on my bookkeeping tasks, I open Quicken, my client hours spreadsheet and PayPal.com, and I can toggle between those three to get things done.

Another great thing about time blocking is that it dictates what we ARE NOT working on right now. I find this very important.  It would be soooo easy to get off track, react to an email, start on a personal or house project and disregard my time blocking and tasks lists!

Time blocking creates urgency within the block, a series of mini-deadlines throughout my day, which helps me to stay productive. For example, today, with it being a holiday week, it is a less structured day with fewer actual appointments, but time blocking helps me to make appointments with myself.

I didn’t realize that other people don’t work this way. I definitely credit my use of this strategy to being a business owner, and working my own professional and personal tasks in around client appointments.

For example, on a given Thursday,

  • One client appointment is in-person from 8:30 am – 11 am and is a 10 minute drive from my home.
  • Then I have a short break for my drive home and some lunch, then I have three virtual client coaching appointments from noon to 3.
  • Those are my paid working hours for that Thursday.  And the time I spend with my clients is focused solely on that client.  
  • In addition to my client hours, however, I also have MY work. 
  • I chose Thursday as an example, because on Thursday, I take care of bookkeeping tasks and Speaking Engagement tasks.

Realistically my schedule for that Thursday could look like this:

  • 6 – 7 am Personal Block: Morning routine, prayer, exercise, shower and get ready
  • 7 – 7:20 am Maintenance Block: make my bed, wipe down the bathroom, start laundry, tidy kitchen while taking my vitamins, making coffee and my lunch
  • 7:20 – 8 am Admin Block: checking email, texts and my social media accounts before I leave
  • 8 – 8:30 am Load up my self and driving to my client
  • 8:30 -11 am Work with client
  • 11 – Noon, drive home, eat lunch, check in on texts and emails, take a brain break
  • Noon-3, 3 hours of coaching calls. This is my paid time, services delivered, billable hours
  • 3 – 3:15 pm Take a break break, grab a snack. Then I start MY WORK:
  • 3:15- 4 pm MONEY / Bookkeeping: Look at work log, send out invoices, update quicken for deposits and spending, create invoices for upcoming speaking gigs and send those out via email
  • 4 – 4:30 pm  Speaking:  Send out emails to site coordinators to confirm upcoming events, share upcoming events on my social media accounts
  • 4:30 – 6 pm Speaking: work on new presentation content, power point presentation and handouts.

There will probably be a little more work later, too, but that may be personal in nature at my laptop, like reading articles of interest, meal planning.

What I just did there was time blocking, or time chunking. I pair up the high priority tasks that I need to accomplish today with the available time I have to complete them.

The first step of Time Blocking is more than just the first step of Time Blocking. And I say that with a smile.  Time Blocking is a great tool to get things done, AND it requires some ground work that we have already covered in my articles, podcasts and newsletters

The ground work for time blocking is:

  • to review our calendar for the day and the week;
  • planning, and also flexibility in planning;
  • to prioritize our important work; and
  • to know our focus areas and what is important to us.
  • Time blocking requires, but also helps us create realistic time estimates – knowing how long our tasks actually take.
  • If I am struggling with overwhelm or with prioritizing, I may go so far as to assign 5 minute increments to the tasks on my to-do list, to determine if I can feasibly tackle the tasks in the block that I have assigned them to. Time blocking requires but also fosters the understanding that all projects are comprised of a series of smaller projects.

To Review, Time Blocking helps us get more done. More importantly, it helps us get our high priority work done. We start with looking at our day and week and at our high priority tasks. We group those high priority tasks into batches with similar themes, we assign those tasks to the time you have available this week. And if you’re currently saying – I have NO TIME to work on my high priority tasks this week, then it is time to be flexible!

Give Time Blocking a try!

Rest and Refresh This Week To Start 2024 Strong

Last week, I took a short road trip to pick up my youngest son at college for his Christmas Break. He will be home with us for a month. I take a lot of road trips, since my sons and family are sprinkled around the Midwest, and if it’s a solo drive, I have a plan to use my travel time effectively. One of my activities on last week’s trip was to listen to my most recent podcast episode.

Yes, I do that. Consider it quality assurance. The other part of that us, I like my podcast. I like the format, I live the positivity, I like the message and the length. In truth, I want to find and listen to more podcasts like mine.

First, I listened to the most recent EP Podcast, hosted by my producer Chris. Then I listened to my most recent episode and I talked about prioritizing our tasks using the Eisenhower Box. Then I moved on to The Daily Fire from Brendon Burchard through his Growth Day App, of which I am a member.

And that day’s episode? This multi-million dollar professional speaker and author and personal development expert? He was talking about… the Eisenhower Box. (For the record, my episode came out on Tuesday that week, and his didn’t come out until Thursday… just saying…)

He’s talking about the Eisenhower box. He was talking about prioritizing! And many of his ideas resonated, but one specifically stood out for me, and I need to share.

He mentioned that this time of year is so busy, and that we need to take breaks so that we don’t start our new year exhausted.

Yes.

That.

So we don’t start our new year exhausted.

Lately, I have been eluding to this idea, but I don’t know if I have been specific.

In the past few weeks,

  • I’ve talked about maintaining our healthy habits in this busy time, how it’s more important than ever to do so.
  • I have mentioned a few ways to handle productivity and self care in this very busy season.
  • We’ve looked at how to get things done when all the world is a distraction and also how to incorporate some holiday joy in there, too.
  • In terms of getting things done and also taking care of ourselves, I have suggested delegating what we can delegate to others, or deleting unimportant tasks completely.
  • I suggested starting your January list, for ideas that are good but that we don’t have time to tackle in December.

We’ve covered all of those topics in December, and so let’s get clear on the end goal. If I haven’t been specific enough, the goal is to survive this crazy season, obviously, and also to Thrive.

Survival, okay, survival is essential, right? We’ve got to survive, but also to be ready to thrive if we’re not already thriving. 

We want to set ourselves up to succeed, and not just around the holidays. We’re taking care of ourselves and getting things done, personally and professionally, so that we aren’t behind or exhausted or feeling ill or depleted when January arrives.

Survive the holidays and maintain a level of health and well being and happiness, and joy and to do all those things.  Because, the job isn’t done on December 25th, or December 31. Life continues. 

What I’m hoping we all can do is not only survive the holidays and maintain whatever level of health and well being and productivity we seek, but also thrive. Flourish. That is next level, right? That is actually making progress, in addition to survival and maintenance.

I know that’s a lot to ask. I am not suggesting to tackle a huge work project, start a rigorous work out routine, or any other unrealistic expectations for these holiday weeks.

What I am hoping for all of us, is that we have some opportunity this week, this last week of the year and maybe the first week of January, while the world is still in holiday mode or the schedules are still a little different that other times of year, to rest, to dream, to enjoy, to thrive. 

Spend some time looking at the lights, drinking cocoa in your pjs and listening to Christmas carols (because the 12 Days of Christmas are the 12 Days AFTER, not the days before). Spend time with your 2023 planner to revel and take note of your successes accomplishments.

And spend time with your 2024 planner, to dream. Dream some dreams for 2024. Set some goals.

Let’s take some time to revel, to bask, to meditate, to sleep in. One strategy I have to get things done around the holiday is to get up an hour earlier. I am really looking forward to re-setting my morning alarm to 5:30 or even 6 am.

I look forward to maybe a couple of days when I don’t have to hop right up and head out to a client appointment or start a call. I look forward to having only one or two things to think about instead of dozens!

I love my clients, I love the service projects I’ve completed in December AND It will be nice to slow down and rest and revel and refresh.

Let’s take a few moments or days to survive and thrive. Because we likely need to, but also to start out the new year strong and rested and calm. M and bright eyed and wide eyed. That’s my hope for all of us. Let’s be as intentional with our rest and recovery for a little bit as we have been for our productivity and to-do lists.

Truth? Some Things Don’t Get Done, And That’s OK.

Hello, friends. It’s mid-December. 

I ran into a friend at Costco. If you live anywhere near me, you recognize that as a loaded statement. My Costco is a solid 32 minute drive from my house, so one does not embark on this adventure lightly.

Second, it was a Sunday in December, midday. I know. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but I was doubting my sanity as soon as I pulled into the parking lot. Of course it was packed.  So, crowded yes, but everyone was actually very pleasant.

My friend and I were both parked on the outskirts of the parking lot. As we walked to the entrance, we discussed an upcoming event we are both volunteering for, for our school district (her much more than me!). And she was kind enough to say, she just doesn’t know how I get it all done, considering all the things I’m involved in. And I marvel at her and her productivity in the same way.

I appreciate her, though, for seeing me in a good light.  As in, ‘look at all the different things you’re involved in and the different ways you serve our community, and that you get things done’. Because I got to tell you, friends, I do not always feel like I’ve got it all together.

And this is coming from a professional organizer and organizational coach!

So here’s the deal. I say yes to a lot of things. I successfully manage many responsibilities. I do. And that is a source of pride and it makes me happy to do these things. I absolutely love all the different organizations and activities and ministries that I’m involved in. And even when I don’t, it’s not that I don’t love the things, it’s that too many tasks are coming due at the same time period.

Yeah, that is definitely the truth.

So, I was writing a much different article for today about prioritization and focus areas, about triaging the to do list and starting the January list. And all of that is still true.

But I want to answer my friend’s question honestly, when she asks “How do you get it all done?”

First, the short answer is, sometimes I don’t.

More fully, the answer is, I ruthlessly prioritize, because saying yes to many things means I can’t also say yes to other things. And I know that. So there are opportunities that might come my way that I have to say no to, because I do not have the time or energy to dedicate to that task or responsibility to do it well.

I’m not saying I don’t have time and energy. I have boundless energy most days and the same amount of time that each of us has. But because I have multiple responsibilities, I can’t always say yes to new things.

And that’s frustrating for me, I know. But the other part of that, especially this time of year, is the ruthless prioritization. I’ve already said yes to many things, and so now I need to figure out how to make it all happen. And that is where prioritization comes in.

If you and your December are anything like me and mine, the to-do list might be looking a little long right now.

It is likely time to triage that to-do list.  This week, let’s clear the clutter from our to-do lists and brains!

Easier said than done,  I know. But to make sure we are getting things done that need to get done, it’s time to ruthlessly prioritize what must be done this month, and also start the list for January and 2024!

That was a long introduction to this week’s topic, how to ruthlessly prioritize the To-Do List!

This morning, I was applying the Eisenhower box to my to-do list – remember that tool?  The podcast episode was early on, go back and check it out if you need a refresher! Eisenhower filtered tasks through the Important vs. Non-Important and Urgent vs Non-Urgent lenses.

And we’re going to do this in reverse:

Delete:

Instead of starting with important and urgent, let’s look at the list and get rid of anything that can be deleted immediately. Things like events you don’t have the time or inclination to attend this month (A “No, Thank You” is a full sentence!), a moratorium on facebook or instagram scrolling for a few days, etc.

Delegate:

After deleting the clutter, let’s look to Delegate.  In the Eisenhower box, there are tasks that are deemed urgent but not important, as in it’s not important that I be the one to complete them. Consider what someone else could do for you.  And let them do it.

We’re hosting Christmas for my family in Michigan on December 23.  And I will be outsourcing many menu items.  Unlike Thanksgiving for 20, I am not attached to making every menu item from scratch, etc. 

If you have house specific tasks, can you hire a service?  barter for time?  rent a teenager or college student?

Perhaps it is work specific, and I am terrible at this one, but I’m working in it!  Is there anyone else on the team with less on their plate that could pick up tasks? And for me, Delegation also looks like NOT saying yes to more tasks, and letting others step up instead.

Decide / Defer:

Next up is the Defer step.  Tasks that are deemed important but not urgent are on the Defer list.

A few weeks back in an episode, I mentioned a January list. There are likely items on your task list that are important but they are not yet time specific.  So, in the interest of getting  the things that MUST be done, done lets look at what we can put off for a bit.

Routine doctor appointments, house projects not related to Christmas, non -holiday related errands – yep, those can all be turfed to January at this point.

As I think about this, I have “find a landscaper” on my to-do list.  And guess what?  That does not need to happen until at least February!  To be honest, I always have a running house project list, and I have to say – if there is a task on there that is not about the holidays, then we can move it to the January to-do list.

Some of my clients will defer organizing until January. Starting early in November, I typically have clients who ask for me to check in with them in January to book our next coaching or organizing session because they know their December is Full.

Medical appointments can also be booked January or into 2024.  Booking regular maintenance appointments is important, as in the fact that they are booked, but perhaps they don’t occur for a few months.  Just getting them on the calendar and then off your to-do list is the point!

Maybe events with friends or family, and now the December schedule is just packed – January could work!  And it would give us something to look forward to in the colder post-holiday glow months!

AND now – Do!  Important AND Urgent!

Now I know that the tasks on my list are things only I can do and that are time specific and therefore urgent. That also means that there are other things that won’t get done today, and I have to accept that. I can give myself grace, cut myself some slack, and assign those tasks to other times this week so they actually get done on time. That’s the way this works.

Ask yourself, “What are things that only I can do?” If we’re feeling strapped, we can start with doing the things that only we can do. As you’re looking at that To-Do list and it’s time to clear some clutter, I also want you to ask the question of  “What Can Only I do?”

I taught my Organize Your Holidays presentation this past week to a lovely group of parents, and we talked about doing all the things… unless they didn’t really feel the need.  For example, do we have to freak ourselves out and spend many hours super-cleaning our home to host guests, or can we relax a little and just host the guests in a clean-enough home?

I really love to bake cookies, but maybe you don’t.  And that’s ok. Sending out Christmas cards is a choice, and maybe you don’t choose to. And that’s ok, too.

There are many tasks I loaded onto this coming weekend after not getting them accomplished this past weekend, because we did so many other wonderful things this past weekend. There are many tasks that I’ve already turfed to January.

WE can delegate tasks that can be done by others.  We can skip the un-important “shoulds” we feel from others and focus on our own traditions. 

We can get things done, AND we can be OK with not getting things done, too. Let’s look at ourselves through kinder eyes, like the eyes and perception of my friend. Be a friend to yourself this week!

Positive Self Talk Changes Your Life In A Good Way!

Did you know?  Statistically speaking, the person you speak to most in your day is… Yourself.

Let’s say, when you’re in your car alone for extended periods of time, you may discover you have a tendency to talk to yourself. (Ok, maybe that’s just me.) For example, I recorded the content of this article on a late night solo drive home from seeing my son in a show in Indiana.

I know I have a tendency to talk to myself. A funny thing, early in lockdown when we were suddenly 5 people in the house together ALL THE TIME, my husband asked me about the conversations I was having with myself!

Do you talk to yourself? (The answer is likely “Yes”, whether out loud or just in your head). And more importantly, what do you say?

Today I want to talk about the importance of positive self talk.

We all learn in different ways. We have ways of processing, learning, organizing. In coaching we refer to these as processing modalities. The 4 most commonly discussed are seeing or visual learners, doing or kinesthetic learners, hearing or auditory learners, and speaking, or verbal learners. And we’re all a blend of all of those. Someone who learns by speaking out loud is called a verbal learner or a verbal processor.

A strength of mine is to verbally process. I am a paid, professional speaker, and a professional cantor, which means I get paid to sing. I enjoy podcasting, and writing articles and sending out a newsletter to my community for the last 15 years. Obviously, verbal processing and communicating for me is a strength. I learn things as I hear myself say them out loud. If you aren’t a verbal processor, it’s possible that you don’t understand what I was just talking about. But if you are a verbal processor or know one!, you will know exactly what I’m talking about when I say that.

What we say matters, and what we hear ourselves say matters.

Imagine with me: I was working with a client a few weeks ago. She is such a treasure, just delightful. My client is a verbal processor, and she was talking to me because I was in the space with her, but mostly she was thinking out loud – verbally processing – as we worked on organizing and clearing clutter in her space.

She was thinking out loud, verbalizing what was going on in her mind. She was doing a great job. She was asking herself really good questions. Do I need this? How can I set this space up best? And she was open to questions from me, as well, to help her through the process. She knew the questions to ask herself, and we held space together for her to work through those, with support if she wanted to talk things out a little more. (That is one of the beauties of coaching, so awesome).

She was thinking out loud and at one point got frustrated with herself and started to say more negative things.

And

then

she

stopped.

She stopped, and realized what she was doing and shifted to saying beautiful, loving and kind things to herself instead. And I was there to witness this beautiful habit.

Our self talk tends to trend negative. Too often, my inner monologue can trend to “Colleen, what is wrong with you? How could you let it get to this?” I think that can happen to all of us.

And we can say out loud that that’s not helpful. As a coach, well, really as a fellow human being, I would never ask you those questions because first of all, they’re mean. And secondly, they’re wrong.

I admired her awareness that the negative self talk was happening. I admired that she know that negative self talk was not a good and healthy habit. And SHE CHANGED HER BEHAVIOR!

Just like my client, when our self talk turns negative, we need to be aware that it’s happening, know that we need to change and then make the change!

Our negative self-talk is often a product of other messages we receive, from society or a teacher in 2nd grade or a sharp-tongued loved one as we grew up. And we can start believing it, even when we know the messages are not helpful and maybe even wrong. Whether it’s right or wrong, true or not true to us, the repetition can make us us start to believe it.

There is good news, though! I am here to share that the opposite is true, too. My client changed her inner soundtrack to positive self talk. So can you. And so can I.

BECAUSE HAVING A POSITIVE INTERNAL SOUNDTRACK CAN CHANGE YOUR LIFE IN A GOOD WAY!

We need to shift our inner monologue, our personal narrative, our self talk. If we tell ourselves over and over, silently or out loud, that we are too busy and too stressed and the week is a total mess at 7 am on Monday, then – well – that is what we will believe. Except that is not helpful and that is not true.

Let’s shift that self talk. We need to be positive with ourselves because some times the world is harsh enough. Right? We don’t need anybody else telling us that it’s a hard life or a hard day, etc. We already know that. We don’t need to say it because it just reinforces the negative. I am not suggesting to lie to ourselves or ignore the obvious, but we can be our own best friend, our own biggest fan and cheerleader, and set ourselves up to succeed.

Every morning, I say out loud my “I Am Statements”. I start my day with positive self talk. And if I say them out loud but still are not feeling positive, I say them all again! Here’s what I say:

  • “I am stronger,
  • I am worthy,
  • I am wealthy,
  • I am loved,
  • I am vibrant,
  • I am wise,
  • I am beautiful,
  • I am smart,
  • I am kind,
  • I am patient,
  • I am generous,
  • I am successful,
  • I am healthy,
  • I am humble,
  • I am grateful,
  • I am brave,
  • I am blessed,
  • I am a blessing,
  • I am forgiving,
  • I am committed to growth,
  • I am a learner,
  • I am a builder,
  • I am committed to being my best self,
  • I am a Child of God.”

What do you want someone to say to you? Be that supportive person for yourself!

What can you say to yourself every day, to make your day and outlook more positive?

How can you be kind to yourself?

Make your list! Make it as long or as short as you want! (Check out Pinterest or Instagram if you need inspiration!!!)

I was speaking with a coaching client a few weeks ago. She has been working through some really difficult tasks over the past few months and I am so proud and happy for her and her progress. But much more importantly, SHE is proud of herself for doing difficult things and is happy with her progress. And she said, as we were discussing her positive self talk, “There are some things I have to say out loud.  Just thinking them isn’t loud enough.” Isn’t that awesome? The good stuff can’t be kept inside – just thinking them isn’t loud enough, they need to be said out loud!

Let’s say the good stuff out loud!!

We Never Really Have to Start From Scratch!

We Never Really Have to Start From Scratch! We don’t have to start over.

Do future you a favor. Take notes. And refer back to them.

I was inspired to write about today’s topic by a recent experience. Of course, because that is usually what inspires me!

Let me set it up for you:

One Saturday morning every other month, a group of parishioners from my Parish assemble 150 bag lunches for a local charitable organization to distribute to their community. That Saturday in November was a few weeks ago.

My friend Kristen organizes the service project every time.  This was our 4th morning so far, we started back in May.  We have added people from month to month, and occasionally one of the regulars can’t attend, but there is typically a team of 10 or so adults and some students seeking service hours. 

We are learning, and we get better at the process every month, every time we do it, which is great. And one of the reasons we get better at it is we don’t start from scratch every time, because, honestly, why should we?

Why shouldn’t we learn from every experience? And yes, we can learn from every experience, but also importantly, we need to remember what we learn.

In addition to learning from the experience, we also need to retain or review or make a note of that.

And here’s the deal – if we do something… occasionally… it’s not yet a habit or a routine.

How often we do something and in what time interval are two factors that impact how much we remember from time to time.  If we don’t necessarily remember all the details every time, that’s okay, because sometimes we don’t, and that’s all right. But we can learn from our experiences and get better at doing things!

In my productivity presentations, I mention recipes, and I’m not talking my corn casserole recipe, even though its Thanksgiving time, even though I have no problem sharing that. I mean, recipes as in a path for future you to take. 

In my presentations, I mention those complex tasks we occasionally complete. Often enough to want to get good at it, but not often enough that it’s become natural or a habit.  The example I use in my class is balancing my company’s monthly banking statements.

When I switched my banking years ago, I connected a credit card to my account for purchases.  My banking and bookkeeping are very simple processes now that they are well established, but when I first made the switch, I would stumble from month to month – log into the banking website from my browser or connect Quicken from the quicken platform?  Make a note in quicken regarding paying my credit card bill from my spending account, or pay the bill first and then update the transactions from quicken?

Every month, when the process was new, I would stumble.

So I leave myself a note.  A short list: open quicken, log into banking website, pay credit card bill on banking website, go to quicken, go to credit card tab, click reconcile, click accept all, make note in Quicken.

To use the service example, after we make lunches, we take a few minutes to talk about what worked and what to tweak next time. For example,

  • We write down who volunteered today.
  • We make note of who showed up in answer to the bulletin article, and collect their email so we can alert them next time.
  • Maybe it’s logistics: “We always start with wiping down tables and putting on gloves” or we “need three plastic table cloths instead of 2”
  • Or, about the process: “We need to start with the longest step first and get that rolling, focus on getting the sandwich assembly line started first.“
  • And “Let’s make sure to confirm the time with the school students who need service hours“.

This is a pretty low pressure situation, to be honest – we have a solid team and the work isn’t difficult.  But we are on the clock, as the lunches need to be delivered by a certain time to the mission who is distributing them. And we still want to do things efficiently and effectively. My friend writes down notes and learning, and the ideas and a plan for next time.

Here’s another example of wanting to do things well and leaving notes from next time.

This time of year, I think of my client who has an orange binder in the cabinet above her kitchen desk. It’s the Thanksgiving binder and it really does contain all things Thanksgiving. She always hosts Thanksgiving.  It’s a big family affair, lots of people bring lots of things, and it’s lovely.

And so from year to year, they make notes in the Thanksgiving binder. For example,

  • How many people were there, and who?
  • What recipes did we use? Who brought what and how much?
  • How about “So and So made made the gravy and it was delicious!”
  • Or “We picked up a pie from such and such bakery, and it was a big hit“.
  • We can write about what worked well and what didn’t, or what did we do well and what could be better.

We can keep notes of those things because we would absolutely forget if we didn’t keep track!  When the service morning rolls around again, Kristen will check her notes that she made and start from there as we set up who is scheduled to help and who needs to bring what.  She already has a plan for next time.  That’s the third or fourth time I have said that today.  Let’s relish in that for a minute.  A plan for next time. Based on what we know and what we continue to learn. 

That sounds pretty great to me.

October is ADHD Awareness Month: More Than Just Awareness

October is ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) Awareness Month.

Last week, I spoke with one of my accountability partners, Laine.  Laine is the ADHD Coach that I want to be when I grow up. She’s amazing. If you’d like to know more, check out her website at http://thinkinganddoingskillscenter.com/.  She is always looking to reach and positively impact more students and adults with her coaching. 

On our accountability call, we discussed that this is the time of year when mid-quarter progress reports go home, and for many students, we find out that they are struggling with their grades and workload.

Perhaps a student hasn’t been diagnosed but the teacher or school administrator may start the conversation regarding testing and diagnosis. 

OR perhaps a student is diagnosed with ADHD but they haven’t necessarily found the strategies or skills, or aren’t using them, or need to explore more to help them do as well as they could in school.

Laine and took a moment to share our own stories about our experiences with ADHD for either ourselves or loved ones.  And I realized that I don’t tell ADHD stories, and that’s a disservice to you and to me and anybody who has ADHD.

Today, I want to talk about what ADHD is and what it looks like in ourselves and the people around us. We will increase awareness around ADHD and some symptoms that go along with it, and mention the strategies and skills that can be used to improve the lives of EVERYONE, including folks with ADHD. 

See what I did there?  I reminded all of us that the strategies that help folks with ADHD to manage their neurodiversity are the same strategies that can help us all on any given day.

To get us started, I want to share a conversation I had recently with a friend about her grown child with ADHD.  And keep in mind – we are not doing an in-depth study of ADHD today, because that would be impossible in one day. 

Today, we are increasing awareness!

This grown child, this young adult, is doing great, professionally speaking. They recently graduated from college, they have a new job in their field of study, they’re really excited about it, they’re just doing great.

But this young adult struggles beyond that.  In addition to a new job, they also have a new living arrangement in this new stage of life. And they are really struggling with all the change, the expectation to set up a home and to manage themselves. 

Of course I can’t coach a person who’s not there, that’s not how that works.  But I can increase awareness with this young adult’s loved one who is trying to understand where their young adult is coming from, and how to help.  And I respect that.  We can all start by recognizing there is more going on with every person than we may be aware of.

First, I asked “is the young adult diagnosed or not?”, and the answer was yes. Next, I asked if they received counseling or therapy specifically around their ADHD and where they may struggle, and the answer was no.

So this friend and I simply worked on ADHD Awareness together.

First, I want you to click over to and read an article I wrote for the basics, ADHD Awareness Month, For Yourself and for Others.

It’s not necessarily that people with ADHD have symptoms that are completely different than anybody else in a busy time of life or any other time. What makes it troublesome and what leads many of us to either get tested or get our loved ones tested for ADHD or other neuro-diversities is if the struggles happen more than occasionally, or are negatively impacting a person’s life. And by life I mean relationships, how they succeed or excel in school or professionally, or in whatever it is that they’re trying to achieve.

So we all have challenges some days with achievement or focus or productivity or motivation, but it’s when those challenges negatively impacts life for a certain amount of time, those are the red flags that say, okay, there’s more going on here, and we need to ask if perhaps this person is neurodivergent. Again, many of us display these characteristics. It’s the severity and the comorbidities, like folks with ADHD also suffering from higher rates of anxiety or depression, that make ADHD troublesome.

Back to my friend and her young adult.

For this friend and her grown child, we discussed that this young adult is able to excel at work but their home life and relationships suffer, and they are exhausted all the time.  I mentioned that, whereas I might have a busy day at work and I need to come home and take a half hour to shift gears and decompress before staring my next activity, someone with ADHD has worked much harder to be productive at work and to manage their challenges and may need much more time to regroup.

Let’s understand Masking.

People with ADHD and other people as well learn to cover up what may be considered culturally undesirable behaviors.  So little ones learn to not blurt out answers in the classroom or hop out of their seats when their energy tells them otherwise.  And they learn to manage and mask, but it also takes effort to NOT act this way.

Let’s understand, too, a different type of masking:

Children with ADHD are often not diagnosed until they reach transitions like elementary school to middle school, or middle school to high school, or even high school to college.  Strong and supportive parenting and learning environments are AWESOME but occasionally ADHD goes undiagnosed until a student reaches the point when their external coping supports (parents and teachers) no longer make up for the challenges from their ADHD.

Let’s understand Hyperfocus

Another characteristic of ADHD is Hyperfocus. ADHD is often misunderstood and underdiagnosed because people with ADHD may be able to hyper-focus on something that is interesting to them.  This is why ADHD is not a full enough name, because “Attention Deficit” is not always true.

And, for many people with ADHD, they are paying Attention to EVERYTHING. Did you know? When a person with ADHD looks like they’re not paying attention, it’s actually very likely that they are paying attention to absolutely everything in the room.  If they’re listening to their teacher talk about math or to a friend tell a story, or they’re trying to focus on the email in front of them, they are also hearing every background sound there is.

They are noticing how their clothing feels at every point that it touches their body.

They are noticing the temperature of the air around them, and the smell of the space.

They are noticing everything. Any pains that might be in their body. They notice it all. It’s not that they’re not paying attention. Attention deficit is actually a misnomer in some ways, because they’re processing input from everything.

And so what may look like inattentiveness is actually the fact that they are processing everything all the time. And they might not even know what’s happening. And where you think that it is a character flaw, defiance or something else, it might very well be that they have so many different signals coming in at any given point that they’re just taking a bit of time to process.

And again, that’s not necessarily specific to ADHD, but it is a common trait of somebody with ADHD.

Let’s Also understand Bandwidth, or spoons.

All of us have a certain amount of energy and focus and motivation to get things done every day.  And once those commodities are used up for the day, it’s time for rest.    Some people call these units of measure spoons.  So each of us starts with a certain number of spoons to use throughout the day. 

With me so far?

All of us consume the spoons.  And if we’re sick or sad, we may have fewer spoons than normal.  And some days we have to do hard things, which uses up our spoons faster.

A person with ADHD may have the same amount spoons as you and me when they start their day.  But they may use them faster than we do because they have to make themselves focus and motivate and get things done in  a certain way that isn’t how their brain is wired to work.

Now, let’s talk about recovery.

Just as a neurotypical person needs to rest and re-fuel to face another day, so does, of course, a person with ADHD.  But it may take longer. In addition to using spoons faster than others, a person with ADHD may take longer to replace the spoons.  Even a person with ADHD who is managing themselves well and getting the support they need knows that they MUST employ strategies and skills to rest and replenish.  And we have to respect that.

Somebody with ADHD, because they have been dealing with all of these external stimuli for so long, can absolutely maintain for a bit, and then they’re exhausted. And what takes you and I perhaps an hour or two, or a good night’s sleep, to recuperate from could take them days.

And I think where all of this is leading me to is right here:

Your awareness of ADHD or now doesn’t validate or invalidate a friend or loved one with ADHD.  Yes, there are people out there who believe ADHD doesn’t exist.

But today I want to increase awareness.  I want to show all of us that we all struggle sometimes.  People with ADHD and people without ADHD.

As I started this topic today, I mentioned that we don’t know where people are coming from. But now we know  more.  We know better.  And I was quoted back to myself last week, apparently I often say “when we know better we must do better” (I will credit this to Maya Angelou). 

No one is broken and no one needs fixed.  We just need to understand more about others, be aware there is more happening than we know and be ready to support others by educating ourselves.  More than 10% of the population has ADHD, whether you or they have been diagnosed or not.  You may have ADHD, and I guarantee you know people with ADHD.  Some who struggle and some who manage well.

We need to understand that it’s happening, and support ourselves and others with understanding, communication and education.

There are resources out there to help. Coaching, counseling, therapy. 

CHADD, https://chadd.org/, Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD)

ADD.org, Attention Deficit Disorder Association

There are tools to help individuals manage their ADHD and to support the folks who support people with ADHD. The best indicator for success is for everyone to understand ADHD Better.