Tag: motivation

How To Not Get Distracted

A participant at a recent presentation asked me how to stay focused on her organizing projects.

She was talking about it in this context: if you’re already working on a project, how to make sure you actually stay in the space where you are working, and not get distracted and leave the space.

Or, if you do get distracted, how to make sure you come back.

I mention in my presentations that we don’t want to be butterflies when we organize. Flitting from room to room and project to project without purpose or focus. We end up in a different room, nothing has been accomplished and we’re not sure where the last few hours went!

This is a great question, and I hear this question a lot. And I know it resonated with other people attending the same presentation.

Yes, There are many strategies we can use to stay focused on our organizing projects and anchored to the space and the work. Some of these strategies can include:

  • Start the project with all of your tools and supplies with you. We can easily get distracted if we keep having to run to different parts of the house for garbage bags, a pen, tape, boxes, etc. Gather your tools and supplies first.
  • Bring in a friend and have them work with you. Perhaps you can swap organizing sessions – your closet this weekend and their closet next weekend!
    • This particular participant had attended the presentation with her sister, so I used the two of them as an example.
    • And a reminder, this is called body doubling, having a person working near you to set that example and help you stay focused.
      • That’s one of the benefits of working with an organizer, that body doubling component.
      • You can also take advantage of body doubling virtually, if you and a friend want to facetime each other while working on projects to chat and process your decision making, tell stories about items, etc.
  • Make the space enjoyable to be in. Turn on music, add a fan or a space heater, turn on the lights and open up the windows. Bring in a favorite beverage, non alcoholic, of course. Let’s do what we can to make this a more pleasant experience.
  • Make yourself some promises! Make sure you have some kind of reward planned for the end of your work session, the end of the project, etc.
  • One of my favorite strategies is to Set timers:
    • One thing that I do with my clients and myself is set a timer and tackle a project in really small bursts.
    • So I may set a timer for 20 minutes and see how much I can get done in that time until the timer goes off.
    • Sometimes I’m feeling so motivated after those first 20 minutes that I will set it for another 20 minutes and stick with it, or I will turn off the timer altogether and just say, oh, I’m doing great here. I can’t wait till I’m finished, so I’m just going to keep plugging along.

I want want to dig a little deeper today on this focus and attention question from both an organizing and also an organizational coaching perspective. Because if we often get distracted, we also have to unlearn that habit. And we need to re-learn healthier and more productive habits.

Breaking distraction habits and learning more productive ones instead is absolutely possible, but not without a plan and some strategies!

I’ll use my current situation as an example.

I started writing this content on a Sunday afternoon while I was also planning to do some batch cooking for the week. I prepped and chopped and assembled. I now have chili on the stove, simmering. I have 2 meatloaves in the crockpot. In addition, I have a rotisserie chicken from Costco that will be turned into dinner a little later. And between those three things, I will have meals for many days this week.

I like to batch-cook, and I especially love the results of cooking multiple meals at a time because it makes my life easier during the week. HOWEVER, there are days when I am cooking and I’ve been in the kitchen for a while, and all I want to do is be anywhere but in the kitchen.

I feel that very strongly sometimes. Like when it has been a lot of work, on top of a busy day. And all I want to do is be anywhere else. I want to go read a book. I want to go do something other than cook. I want to be anywhere else. But I also stop the impulse on that one because I know that sticking with the kitchen project for just a few more minutes – finishing the clean-up, putting the last few dishes in the dishwasher and wiping down the counters – is the better course of action. And then I can take a longer break, right?

Instead of responding to that misguided impulse to be anywhere else and leaving the work undone, I recognize the impulse, and I remind myself that if I stay just a few more minutes, I will be completely done instead of almost done, and I can enjoy my well earned rest a little more.

Let’s break that down.

  • Recognize the impulse, the distraction, the desire to go and do something else.
  • And stop for a minute and think it through.
    • Do I really need to be somewhere else right now, or am I just bored with this? Or, I’m tired, there are other things I also need to do, etc.

Let’s face it, there could be lots of reasons why I don’t want to be doing that project anymore, and it would be tempting to leave.

But – again – if I realize the distraction, and remind myself to stick with it just a few more minutes, I can be completely done instead of just almost done, and then I can enjoy that rest a little more, or I can go and do something else with a clear conscience.

We recognize and then examine the impulse and decide if it’s just an impulse or if it’s actually a good idea. And usually, we’re better of just sticking with the task a few more minutes, and we’ll get the job done.

I think I say this every week lately, but we start with Awareness, awareness, awareness!

Another more specific way to fight distraction and stay focused on a project is to zoom in on your task. As in, narrow your focus on the project in front of you.

I’ve been working with a new client for a few months now. Recently we were going through papers from 2015. This happens a lot, no judgement. She moved offices at work and at home and there were a number of things that were bundled up, and because there wasn’t anything truly pressing or important in there, they just kind of got shuffled aside. We came across a to-do list from years ago. She read it and then laughed and shared it with me, her organizer. And it says at the top, “declutter”.

A great idea and to-do and intention, but it’s just word on a piece of paper at that point.

My suggestion would be to get more specific on what “declutter” entails, or what “get organized” looks like. If we don’t get more specific, those things are never going to actually happen.

One way to stay to on task or focused on a project is to make your action ridiculously specific. So instead of just saying get organized or declutter, let’s try this: I want to complete some organizing projects for spring. In the first hour that I have today, I will will review my closet and dresser and my clothes. When I’m done with that, I want to re-pack the items in the furnace room that we’ve set aside for my college student to move into an apartment in the Fall. And after that, I want to review the bottom drawer of my office file cabinet and shred items from more than 4 years ago, now that our taxes are filed.

Right? So all of those items would be on the list and on the task list, but it would be far more specific than get organized or declutter.

And when we can look at big projects in terms of being a series of small projects, it makes it easier for us to stay focused on those projects so we can see results.

For example, let’s say – I’m going to organize the basement this weekend. But what if your basement is huge and a hot mess? You could say instead, “I’m going to organize the shelves in the laundry room, and then I’ll review all the old paint on the floor by the door, and then I will review the towels and toiletries in the downstairs linen closet by the bathroom.”

If we don’t narrow our focus, it’s no wonder we can get distracted. Breaking down big tasks into smaller tasks help us to feel motivated, fight the impulse to get distracted, and helps us to see results. And positive results keep us coming back!

I get the “How TO Stay On Track” question from my coaching clients as well, and some of the strategies are the same!

My coaching client may say “I want to get organized”, and I will say – awesome! But let’s get specific. What does that look like? What results do you seek? What are actions you can take every day, and how can I support you in taking them?

ZOOOOMing in, narrowing in, focusing in to stay motivated:
Does getting organized mean getting more done in your day? Switching your work and bill paying over digital and online? Figuring out your family’s schedule for the summer? Planning a trip and figuring out what that looks like for you and your family? Getting a handle on your health and wellness? Organizing the physical space in your home, of course?

Yep, we can do that. We can do all of those things, but we can’t just start with a global “OK, I want to get organized”. The first thing that we would ask in a coaching session would be to bring that into what can we accomplish in today’s session? What can we accomplish, you know, in the next 30 minutes that will help you to activate those ideas on your own, you know, in the next week or two before we speak again.

ZOOOOMing in. We can do lots of things, but we have to bring it in and we have to get specific. Because that will help us to stay motivated and anchored to the work.

When we get specific and break things down into smaller bits, it means we actually start to feel some accomplishment as we complete those smaller bits. We can track progress, we can see improvements. We can remind ourselves of our progress if we get distracted or we get off track. Um, all of those things, uh, are, again, tools to help us to stay on track, and if we get distracted, to get back on track as well.

And we can break the distraction habit and use these strategies to get back on track. Because distractions will come! But we’re bigger and better than our distractions.

How To Help Future You!

Last week in a video on Social Media, I asked the question “What would help you the most to be done with, to get completed this week?”

As in, asking myself: “If I could get this one thing… (fill in blank here…) done:

  • a lot of other things would fall into place;
  • I wouldn’t have to spend anymore mental energy on it;
  • I could move on to other tasks or projects; or
  • I could just stop thinking about it!”

For me, the answer last week was: moving clients to the scheduled column; and taking care of some errands that were once-and-dones (and not recurring errands).

Also, last week, I attended my monthly Leadership / Non-profit Mastermind meeting where we discussed how the summer schedule is often different than the rest of the year, and how that different schedule can provide different opportunities. And, how to take advantage of those different opportunities.

So, my question to you and to me this week, is to zoom out a little and ask:

  • “What would help you the most to be done with, to get completed this summer? What can you do now, in this more relaxed and expansive time, to set yourself up to succeed this Fall?

Summer is indeed different for me, schedule- and responsibility-wise. Professionally, not too much changes with my client load and presentations. But my other responsibilities are different. For example, I attend MANY fewer meetings in the summer.

Did you know? I am a school board member for my local school district. And summer has more committee work and planning since students are not in the buildings. The day-to-day work is much different. The work for me is more self-directed and the deadlines are farther in the future.

Of course, self directed learning is is sometimes dangerous territory – it’s easy to get distracted when working isn’t URGENT! But I digress.

The point is, for Board work, if I ask myself this question:

What would help the most to be done with, to get completed this summer? What to do now, in this more relaxed and expansive time, to set up to succeed this Fall?

The answer is, In the summer to do myself a favor this Fall, I can close out some small projects and clean up some documents that never seem to get completed during the year.

In addition to board work, I run a choir for my Parish. Post-pandemic, I am very happy to say that we returned to a more consistent schedule after Easter this past Spring. We still take summers off, but I know we will sing Masses this Fall. And for me, the most time consuming and stressful part of running a choir is NOT managing a dozen people or singing in front of hundreds, it is setting up our song lists every week and month.

So, to ask the question again, “What would help you the most to be done with, to get completed this summer? What can you do now, in this more relaxed and expansive time, to set yourself up to succeed this Fall?

Here is the thing – If you don’t know this, I am Catholic and the readings and therefore the song selection works on a rotating year schedule, and are determined years in advance. Which means I can use summer time to set the line-ups now for September 2023 to May 2024 and save myself a while lot of struggle during the busier time of year.

So this is how this tool, this question, can work!

Let’s break it down a little more!

  • First, we need to look at our Focus Areas (if you need to review, you can go back and check out episode #5, or check out this article).
  • Once we know what is important to us, we can look at what projects we can complete or perhaps start in this summer schedule. My board work and my choir work are both part of my Focus Area of Service, and since I know they are important to me, I can look a little closer at what to do this summer to help me all year round.
  • Once we’ve identified the project, we need to BREAK IT DOWN INTO LITTLE TINY PIECES. A highly effective strategy to fight overwhelm and to make progress on any task is to recognize that all large projects are a series of small projects.
  • And then take action, and stay on track! And, how to stay on track?
    • Remind yourself that completing this project will help future you!
    • It’s important to make room for those important but non-urgent (see my Eisenhower Box blog article, or re-listen to podcast episode #4!) tasks to still make they happen. Do not leave your scheduling up to chance! Dedicate white space – actually schedule time to complete those project pieces!
    • Perhaps you can schedule the project time in place of the typical scheduled time. For example, during the school year I have a monthly meeting on a Monday afternoons – I could absolutely use that found time this summer to work on my school board notes and projects.
    • Or
    • I can use a couple for hours on a Wednesday evening when we typically would be in rehearsal to work on my weekly mass line-ups for Fall, since I am often thinking musical thoughts that evening anyway!
    • Finally, create at least a little urgency, if you find that motivating. I know I do.
      • In talking to a friend and networking partner today, she said and I quote “Oh no rush on those items you promised, just take your time.” and I said “No! Never tell me to take my time, or I lose urgency!” So I will take care of our tasks ASAP and let her take her time in responding!

“What would help you the most to be done with, to get completed this week?” And this summer?

Once we have created multiple small projects instead of large ones, we can assign deadlines at regular intervals throughout the summer months to create some urgency and get things done! Do future you a favor, set your plan and then make some progress on those tasks that will help Future You the most!

Sticky Habits

The topic of habits came up repeatedly with clients last week.

We can all agree that bad habits can be tough to break, but we also need to recognize that good habits may be tough to establish, requiring consistent time and energy and intention.  Research says that a new habit needs 3 weeks of adherence before it is likely to stick.

Yet, to get and stay organized, we need to make those Good Habits stick.

We set out with the best intentions to get organized.  We analyze our process, spend hours purging clutter, buy the right containers, and organize our lives and brains and homes.  But if we don’t create habits around maintaining that organization, we’ve wasted a lot of energy, time and money.

Ooh, ouch.  Re-reading that last statement, I hope it doesn’t sound too harsh.  It is true, though, friends, harsh or not.

I recognize that the rush that accompanies a big success or a finished project is difficult to maintain for the long term.  And so we have to rely on other forms of motivation to keep us on the path to Good and Organized Habits.   What can we do about this?

Use technology.hand-apple-iphone-smartphone-large (1)

     Take advantage of the technology available. My smart phone helps me with my Wellness habits.  I love my Fitbit. It syncs with the Fitbit app on my phone, and tracks my exercise and how many steps I walk.  It sends me reminders to reach my 10,000 steps-a-day goal, and motivational boosts through the day.  I thought these reminders were silly at first, but they work!
      I have a couple of new apps that help me remember and reinforce other good habits, too.
     My Plant Nanny app (free), introduced by two wonderful friends (thanks PM and JM!), reminds me to drink water every hour during the day.  A sound accompanies the reminder, then I open the app and water my plant when I water me.  It may seem silly, but those little plants and the app make me smile and work really well!
     My newest app is called Habit List ($3.99). I list the habits I want to establish or maintain (Water the Garden Daily, and Post On Twitter Daily, for example), determine how often I want to complete the task (daily, every two days, etc.) and the time of day I want to receive a reminder.  Again, this app sends reminders, and tracks my progress.

    If I wanted to add home organizing tasks to the App, I could add habits like Take out the Recycling, Change the Bedding, Pay the Bills, etc. to the list, too., with dates and reminders attached.

You’re never too grown-up for a gold star.  

     A client, a retired educator, uses a star chart just like a student might, to track progress on circle_star_goldgood habits and keep her motivated to keep up the good work. A star for each day a certain task is completed, and a full week of stars on the chart earns a prize for the weekend (Special outing with a friend, fresh flowers for her home, perhaps a special snack or prize?).  This tried and true motivator works for kids AND adults!

Use reminders that play to your strengths.

post its     Are you or a loved one a visual learner?  As you establish new Good Habits, use visual reminders like lists, post-it notes, highlighters or REALLY BIG CLOCKS, or have your technology send you text messages.
     Are you an auditory learner?  I am.  I learn well by hearing things.  Hearing the chiming clock in the dining room ring on the hour and half hour helps me stay on track.  In addition, all the apps I mentioned earlier send me notifications with sounds, like the alerts to drink more water, check my Habit List, or alert me 15 minutes before an appointment so I’m more likely to be on time.  And if I’m struggling with focus, I can set timers or use other sounds, like a favorite playlist, to keep me on task.
     Do you learn by doing / touching / moving things around (kinesthetic)?  For you (or your family member), the physical act of writing and then checking off tasks or habits on a list may be useful, or using chore cards or magnets or other things that you can move around may help.

       Some of us learn by saying things out loud, too.  If this describes you or a family member, try describing your habits to others, or creating a mantra or single sentence to repeat to yourself to help you focus on your good habits.

Good Habits may take time and energy to create, but having them and sticking with them will serve you well for years to come.  Find ways to make those Good Habits stick!

How Are You?  No, Really. How Are You?

Getting and staying organized requires focus, motivation, a plan, energy and probably a few more things, if I think about it.

It requires Action. Vision.

And sometimes a healthy meal and comfy shoes!

Getting organized can be a challenge for some people, but its really challenging if you are already feeling off, or at a disadvantage.

Good Self-Awareness and Self-Management are powerful tools in life. They help us be our best self and do our best work.

Know any toddlers? I’ve known a few. And I know some adults who may occasionally think or act like a toddler, myself included. Toddlers lose their cool sometimes. We all do. But toddlers, and the rest of us, are more likely to melt down if they are overwhelmed, hungry, tired, thirsty, bored, in need of a washroom, cold, uncomfortable or just plain sad (to name a few).

In my Organizing Coaching classes, we learn about self-management. To be fully present and focused on my client and our organizing coaching sessions, I have to make sure that I am ready before we begin. I manage my physical needs, and also mentally prepare. I can’t help others until I’ve helped me.

So, if

  • your focus has dimmed;
  • your motivation has lagged;
  • your planning failed; or
  • your energy has run out;
  • it may be time to ask yourself some questions.

Is it time to eat something? Something healthy?

Is it time for a cold or hot drink?

Do I just need to step away from this project for a moment and take a walk around the block to get some clean breaths?

Am I bored? Could I use some music or a partner to help this project go more smoothly?

How do I feel in this space?

Is this space too cold? Hot? Drafty? Smelly? Too dark? Too bright?

Is this project difficult? Am I uncomfortable because I am being called upon to do difficult work?

Am I upset now because of something bad that happened earlier or yesterday or last week?

The answers to any of these questions can give us an idea of why we’re feeling out of sorts, and also the ways to rectify the situation.

A friend and client shared a powerful tool she learned in Recovery, HALT. When we feel like our resolve or focus or calm are slipping, we can ask our self if we are Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired? Addressing these challenges first can help us continue to make good and positive choices.

When we’re working through our organizing projects, or our work day or just life in general, we can’t always fix every discomfort we have. But increasing our self-awareness and improving our self management helps us put names to our challenges. And then we can begin to make them better.

The Super Special Secret to Organizing Success (Ok, it’s not a secret)

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starting-line-running-trackYou’re busy.   You’ve got a home and life, work or volunteering or family, or any combination of those.  I would guess that you’re not sitting around, doing nothing.  Our days are filled.

But we know we want to make a change.   We want to get more organized, get a better grip on our home or finances or work life or time.  We want to make a change.  We NEED to make a change.

But that feels scary.  We know we have to carve out time, space and energy to do something different, something extra, to make progress.  We have to get a little uncomfortable, push ourselves a bit.  But where?  How?  If I’m going to get uncomfortable and push myself, I want to KNOW it’s right, KNOW that I’m doing the exactly right thing.

And there, friend, is the rub.  We need to do SOMETHING, but we may never know that we are doing the exactly right thing.   But here are strategies to start your Whole-Life or Just-One-Little-Corner-Organizing Project. Multiple strategies, because different strategies work on different days or with different projects.

1.  Start with a clipboard.  Grab a clipboard, paper and pen, and walk around your house, noting all potential organizing projects, big or small, realistic or ridiculous.   I often start client sessions with this step; asking questions, opening every door, challenging my client to think about what their space will look like when it’s “organized”.  Don’t edit this list yet, and don’t get overwhelmed.  This is just the list.

2. Look at the complete list, and start to pare down and strategize how to get these projects done.  The list is a great place to start, as it will show some commonalities, like how “Shelves in linen closet”  and “container under the kitchen sink to hold cleaning supplies” can both be satisfied with a trip to Home Depot or Menards.

Now, getting down to business…

3. Start with the easiest project.  Some projects are pretty straightforward. Maybe your home office just needs better lighting and a good printer stand with paper storage.  Again, one quick trip to Office Max, or perhaps a walk around your home or office to see if you already own furniture or a lamp that would solve your problem.  Start with easy, if that gets you moving.  Or…

4. Start with the toughest project.  Paper?  That is a tough project.  Toy Room?  Yes, that could be scary, too. I know, decision making is difficult.  But delaying those tough decisions is what created clutter in the first place.  Get tough, maybe even a little angry, and get to it.  Or…

5.  Start with a small project.  The day after Christmas, I tidied a kitchen drawer while I waited for my tea pot to boil. I continued drawer by drawer by cabinet over the next few days,  in 5 or 10 minutes increments.  Every drawer and cabinet has been tidied and purged, in little pieces.  Small projects keep us motivated but not overwhelmed. Or…

6.  Start with a large project.   Bite off the BIG BITE, the BIG PROJECT that will reap really big rewards once it’s complete. For example:  Garage?  It’s estimated that over half of the garages in the US hold clutter instead of cars.  Garages are big projects, but spending a day or two of really big work and effort will pay off with parking your cars in the garage instead of clutter.  Yes, this is a big project, and sometimes we need BIG results.

Ok, friend, let me share a secret.  Each of these strategies started with “Start”.  Yes, just one simple word, “Start”.  There is not secret to organizing or getting things done.  Each of those words is an action word.  Progress requires Action, and Action requires a START! So, the determinant of your success is not which strategy you use, it’s just that you use one and START.

The Gift Of “Completion”

The Gift Of “Completion”.  Done.  Good enough.  Followed-through. Tied up the loose ends.

christmas-present-lg

Give yourself and others the gift of “Completion” this week.  The gift of “Done”.

We all know what we are supposed to do, but we don’t always do it.  Go ahead and do it this week.

A client and her spouse challenged each other to complete the homework I assigned a month ago, before taking on more projects.  Completion.  Done.

“Completed” is powerful.  “Done” feels great.

I worked in a client’s home recently, and we discussed “Done” in terms of the items in her dining room awaiting delivery to other destinations (like donated books and a table destined for a co-worker’s art room).  She planned to have her teenagers drop off the items that day, to complete those final steps to clearing out their home space.

I ordered and picked up 20 more photo Christmas cards yesterday, went home, assembled them and sent them out.  Done. I balanced my business check book, updated my bookkeeping and paid my bills today instead of next week, to financially finish (almost) 2014.  I encouraged (nagged) my sons to finish wrapping their gifts so we could be done with the gift wrap.  I dropped off bags of donations, just to get them out of my house.  I went to my annual physical today. Done, done, done.   Whew.

Some days it seems that the last few steps of a project are the hardest to get motivated to complete (and therefore never seem to get done).  But please, push through those last steps, and then revel in Completion and Done.

“Completion” helps us breathe deeply, un-clutter our brain, feel lighter, look up and around, and think about something new for a change.

2014 is quickly wrapping up, and 2015 is almost here!  In what areas can you tie up the loose ends this week and next? Work? Personal?  Correspondence?  Small home projects?  What requires Follow-through?   Take time to wrap up those last steps and complete your projects!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

7 Motivation Boosters That Worked This Week

What is Motivation? Energy? Drive? Google defines it “the reason or reasons one has for acting or behaving in a particular way, or the general desire or willingness of someone to do something”.  Finding and keeping “Motivation” is a recurring theme with my clients and the rest of the world, too!

Below are 7 ways to increase our “desire or willingness to do something”, that worked for others this week.  Give one a try!

  1. Recognize the BIG DEAL OF MOTIVATION isn’t so big after all. It’s one simple decision. Yes or No. Left or Right. Up or Down.  From moment to moment, choose to do the productive thing over the unproductive thing, organized over disorganized, the healthy choice or the unhealthy choice.  Motivation shows up in little tiny steps in the right direction, as opposed to large sweeping gestures or drastic life changes.
  2. Change your Perspective.  Be someone else.  A friend hates filing his papers, and wants an assistant who would file for him. So, as silly as it sounds, once a week, he plays a little mind game, pretends to be his own assistant, and takes care of those mundane tasks that he dreads.  Knowing him, he may even send himself out for a cup of coffee as a reward.  If I lack motivation to take care of tasks, I might pretend to be my favorite concierge ever, Angelo, who helped me plan a girls’ weekend.  Step outside of yourself, be that helper for 30 minutes and take care of all those things you want to hand off to someone else.
  3. Accountability.  Here’s how: Agree with a friend to accomplish a list of tasks, and report to each other via texting or email when you accomplish each task (phone calls take too long).  The act of reporting our successes can be so motivational!  On the other hand, wanting to avoid the embarrassment of having to admit we didn’t accomplish something may be motivating enough to get us to accomplish the tasks!
  4. Tackle big projects in small pieces.  Perfectionist thinking says “I only want to start the task when I have time to complete it”, even when the task takes 10 hours.  And we rarely will get 10 hours in a row to dedicate to a task.  Try little pieces to move your projects along.
  5. Employ Hard Stops.  Hard stops go together with “little pieces”.  We hesitate to start projects because we have no idea how long they’ll take to complete. Try scheduling time to just work on the task, not necessarily complete it.  Set a timer, commit to stopping at a certain time, then STOP! And go do something else!  You’ll make progress in a couple of areas, and feel more motivated to get back to your tasks next time.
  6. Pay attention to people sapping your motivation.  Perhaps your boss, a needy friend, a cranky family member?  Even after you finish speaking with them, your brain mulls over the conversation, and your focus and energy are gone.  You can’t avoid them altogether, but you can take back your energy and focus.  Consciously decide to return to Yourself, Your Plan, Your Day.  I know, it is easier said than done, but it can be a powerful feeling, to take back your motivation.
  7. Pay attention to other drains on your motivation.  I worked with a client recently who mentioned she felt terrible every Sunday evening.  So the question is not “How do we take off every Monday from work”, but instead, “What do we do differently over the weekend that makes us feel poorly by Sunday?”  Poor food choices, staying up late, sleeping in?  What if our headache or upset stomach are from anxiety about the coming week?  Be aware, and take action.

So, the next time your get-up-and-go gets up and goes, try one of these ideas to give your motivation a boost!

What Do “Fat” Pants and Empty File Cabinets Have in Common? 

What Do “Fat” Pants and Empty File Cabinets Have in Common? Well, let me tell you.

Recently, a client rejoiced about losing 50 pounds over a two year period.  Awesome!  However, she can’t seem to part with a few pair of pants from those past heavier days.  Her concern?  “What if I gain some weight back? I’ll need these (old, stretched, faded) pants.”

Another client recognizes that his work office is overcrowded.  He and I have worked for months, converting his papers to either digital documents or to shredding.  And even though he has lightened his paper load considerably, he is still hesitant to get rid of the old empty file cabinets. “What if I accumulate all that paper again?”

“What If?” or “…Just In Case…” is what “fat” pants and empty file cabinets have in common.  We rejoice with positive change, but don’t always trust our good fortune or good intentions to last.  So we keep clutter, instead of purging it.  And it piles up.

We all have some “What If? / Just In Case” items cluttering our space or brains.  I’m a planner and a Mom, so I spend a lot of time considering “What If? / Just In Case”.  For example, I packed for a 7 mile hike last week – “What if it rains? Or someone gets hurt?  Better pack the rain gear, first aid kit, and some extra water, just in case.”

Some “What If? / Just In Case” is necessary.  But saving too much for “someday” gets us into trouble, by subconsciously giving us permission to fall back into past negative behaviors.  Or we crowd our closets and offices with STUFF saved for “What If? / Just In Case”, for some possible future far down the road.  And all that STUFF gets in the way of today’s reality.

I helped a client de-furnish her space last week.  We moved a large table out of her living / dining area, and moved a desk, chair, box fan and mirror out to the curb.  Some stranger will come along, pick up the items and be happy.  She let go of the “What If? / Just In Case” items, and has more room to breathe and move, plus less visual clutter.

How?  She knows she has all the stuff she needs, and now she needs clear space and peace of mind.  She has changed her habits over time, and knows that regardless of what life brings, the uncomfortable chair and outdated desk won’t be needed.  Empty boxes or furniture is great, but sometimes attracts more clutter.

Over the weekend, another client was seeking motivation to go through some clothes, papers and religious items.  I suggested she start looking at her stuff with the belief “I know I have everything I need”.  Then she supplied the important rest of the question:  “Since I have everything I need, Could someone else use this, more than me?”  The coat we save for “What If” could keep someone warm today.  The old dishes or household goods could help a woman getting back on her feet after homelessness.

So when “What If?” or “… Just In Case…” has got you stuck, change your internal sound track and make some changes.  Tell yourself:

  • Letting go of STUFF will provide me with Peace of mind, clear and uncluttered space, perhaps a little extra $$ in my pocket or a charitable donation tax write-off.  Those are real and immediate benefits, to counteract the vague and uncertain “What If? / Just In Case”
  • I have everything I need.  And more.
  • Since I have everything I need, I can let some things go.
  • If I let something go and then someday need it again, I can borrow it / rent it / be creative and make do.
  • Having the fat pants / empty file cabinets will tempt me into sliding back into old and bad habits.

Conquer “What if?”  or “… Just In Case…”, make some permanent positive change, and purge that clutter!  Gone, gone, gone is Good!!

Look Inside and Out, and Find Your Motivators!

I dream of discovering One Simple Elegant Equation that every person can use to flip the switch inside, to motivate them to get up and ACT!  That one equation that would energize us to organize and actualize, to make a better life.

There are two problems with this dream.  First, there is no one simple answer because each of us is different.  Second, it is not up to Me to motivate You.  I cannot make you do anything, aside from physically moving you from point A to point B.  Your motivation comes from you, not me.

I can certainly help you find it and use it, though!  So let’s find some MOTIVATION!

External Motivation:

I have a client who relies solely on External Motivation.  She waits until the last minute to take care of business, or to clean the house for major events.  ‘Someone is coming over, I’ll clean up.’  ‘I’ll pay my bills because they came due, but they will be late and I’ll pay fees.’  She is waiting to be “in the mood to organize.”,  She states that if no one ever came by the house again, she would never clean it again.   She gets tasks done, but in a hurried and incomplete fashion.

The “mood” to organize may never come.  If that urge to organize hasn’t happened recently, why should we expect it?  Most days we can’t wait, we just need to move, to act, to organize even if we don’t feel like it.  That is when we need to find Internal Motivation.

Internal Motivation:

The next day I walked with a friend.  She and I had both been cleaning bathrooms before our walk because Friday is her cleaning day, too.  Motivation that comes from inside, from established routines and habits and the desire to do the right thing, that is internal motivation.

Motivation in general:

Both types of motivation are good.  People can find motivation in their own heads or in the world around them, or both.  I take out the trash on our weekly trash day (external) but also when it gets full and I am cleaning my house (internal).

Motivation can come from many sources.  At basic levels, motivation comes from fear.  Ever heard of the fight or flight response?   We are motivated to act to avoid pain, punishment, embarrassment or negative reactions.  But we humans can attain loftier goals than just survival.  We can find positive ways to motivate ourselves to act.   I often get asked “How do I get co-workers / my family / myself to organize?”  The answer is “find motivators”.

Professionally, motivators are easy to spot.  They include paychecks, promotions, perks and professional esteem.  Personal motivators for yourself and others may be tougher to find, but they do exist!!  Here’s where to find yours:

  • Goals and dreams motivate us.  Rome was not built in a day, and neither is anything else worth having.  Keep your goals in mind and when you need motivation to act, ask yourself what one thing you could do right now to move closer to your goal.  Then get up and do it.
  • Sometimes it’s OK to be selfish and ask “What’s in it for me?”.  If we’re talking about organizing, you will gain money from a a business venture, better planning, or a garage sale.  You gain an empty cabinet or drawer for supplies for a new hobby, a cleaner house that you can invite guests to, etc.
  • Look for something concrete.  Use “I want” statements, and be specific.  Like….
  1. I want to be less stressed in the morning, so I am motivated to create and stick to a better routine.
  2. I want more money to go on vacation or make a major purchase, so I am going to get organized in my shopping and bill paying and spend less.
  • Recognize cause and effect.  If your kids want a new game system, show them that selling extra toys clears clutter and earns money.  For you or your spouse, a clean garage means no scraping snow come winter.
  • Use growth and life transitions as opportunities to make positive change.  Transitions give us      opportunities to re-invent ourselves. New jobs, new communities, new seasons, maybe just a new day – it is always a good time to make positive change.  Personal growth encourages us to look      outside ourselves at the world around us and inside ourselves to know ourselves better.  Both kinds of motivators!
  • Peer pressure is not all bad.  So long as you like and respect your peers, wanting to be more like them can be a great motivator.  Hanging out with well-informed, well-educated, generous, physically fit people?  Sure, I want to be like them!  What can I do to be more like these  great people I admire?

So, where in your life are you looking for motivation?  Let me know, and try one of the suggestions listed above.  You can change your life, you have that power.  Look inside or out and use your motivators!

What Would Make This A Great Week?

Last Monday, my friend Karl posted on Facebook:  “I am going to do everything possible to make this a great week.”  He doesn’t know how much his statement resonated with me.  Reading the post as a week began really got me thinking.  Hmmmm…., what would a great week look like?  I will:

1.  Give the “best of me” to my family.

  • There is a line from a favorite song:  “Those closest to your heart / so rarely get the best of you.”  We put on our public face for work and friends, and then give our crabbiest selves to our loved ones, because we feel comfortable with them, and secure in the fact that they will love us anyway. But don’t they deserve better? Of course. This week:
  • There is more tickling, hugging, music and gratitude.
  • I have been editing myself a lot, taking a breath before acting.  I composed a note to my older (12 and 14) sons the other day, outlining house tasks to complete.  Because I was very frustrated with the recent lack of cooperation, the dictation in my head was littered with cranky language.  Luckily, I edit.  A lot.  I switched to writing the note on the computer to save my hand, and left them a polite and concise list of expectations for their day (and I even told them why things needed done, so they could see how “putting away laundry” should come before “pack for the weekend” because then they can find their favorites easier).  It took longer, but it was better.
  • I am communicating more with the teenager, as to why we make the decisions we make.

2.  Take good care of me.

  • I take care of others, but I don’t always take care of Me.  This week, I made a greater effort to take my vitamins and get enough sleep.
  • I made appointments with the allergist, the acupuncturist, and for a massage.
  • I’m still working on the daily exercise, but managed at least basic push-ups and sit-ups most mornings.

3.  Take Care of Business, personal and professional.

  • I completed some unfinished business, and permanently eliminated some items on the to-do list, either by completing them or eliminating the expectation.
  • I practiced some tough love in my business, and had a couple of difficult client conversations.  I’ve been dreading these conversations, and the worry was really draining on my mental energy.  The conversations went fine, of course, I should have acted weeks ago.

4.  and Be On Time.

  • As summer began, it felt like we were late to everything.  Just a few minutes, and no one noticed       (much), but it made me cranky.  Transitions are always tough and we had our new summer       schedule.  And I am balancing my sons’ desire to stay up later and sleep in (a joy of summer for my boys) with my need to get things done and get to work.  So we got back on track:
  • I synchronized all the clocks (and shhh….. set them 2 minutes ahead, just 2 minutes), then asked the boys to set their watches.
  • I enlisted and embraced aid – Sports Camp Car Pool, you say?  I’m in!  Thanks, ladies!
  • The older boys are using more pedal power.  We tuned up the bikes, discussed the best and safest way to their various destinations, and they like the feeling of independence so they have been leaving earlier to get to their activities.  Win-win!!

So my challenge to you this week is to determine for you and your family what would make this a “great week”, and make a couple of small changes to make life better.  And please, share with me what would make a “Great Week” for you!