Multitasking Is A Myth, Here’s a Different Strategy

I don’t know if I’ve ever said this in a blog article, and I’m pretty sure I haven’t said it in a podcast episode, but here is a bold statement.

Are you ready?

Multitasking is a myth.

And I am saying this as a person who spends most of her days doing what looks like multitasking. The real irony is that I started writing this content while driving (I record it as a voice memo to transcribe later), and now I am editing it while hosting my Finish Line Friday productivity session. Looks like multitasking, but it isn’t.

And here is the thing: when we think we are multitasking, we are really switchtasking. This term was first introduced to me by Dave Crenshaw, just want to give credit where credit is due.

Unless we truly are just walking and talking, or watching TV and eating popcorn, or riding in a car and watching the scenery, our brain is actually switching back and forth between tasks.

So the point is, multitasking is a myth. Our brains truly are not capable of doing multiple things at a time well. We can’t do them well. At least, depending on the different tasks, right?

Perhaps I can drive and also take a call, but I’m not doing either task then as well as I could. And certainly not in a congested area where I also need to pay attention to the navigation a little bit more closely. So I absolutely end calls with people, or I just don’t answer my phone, because sometimes, yes, I recognize that my brain can’t necessarily do two high focus things at once.

It’s not that we can’t do multiple things at once, it really depends on the complexity or severity or the type of action.

I can chat with my husband while we take a walk. I can cook and listen to music. I can wash the dishes or clean the house and talk to somebody on the phone. We CAN do multiple things at once. However, with high level thinking and focus, we cannot multitask. What is occurring in your brain, again, is switch tasking. Switch tasking is what it sounds like, switching our focus. And every time we switch our focus, we have to refocus on the thing in front of us, and then when we switch back, we have to refocus again on this new thing that we’re focusing on now.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I know that there are some days that I can focus easily and switch easily, and there are some days that I cannot switch easily or refocus easily. And what that means to me is that my capacity to focus is a limited commodity and can be used up over the course of a day or week. Like energy and time and decision-making capacity. Those three things, too, are also needed to get things done and are also finite resources that can get used up, more quickly on some days than others.

My ability to switch and re-focus is finite, and may be affected on some days by external factors like my quantity and quality of sleep the night before, or how noisy my work space is, or how often my phone is chiming at me with notifications.

Switch tasking requires focus, energy, brain space or bandwidth, whatever you want to call it. And uses these up faster than just regular tasking, if that’s a word. There may come a point, some days earlier in the day than others, when we can’t switch-task successfully. We are not as productive as we want to be, or should be.

We can spend all of that focus and energy and time, and then it’s gone. We can deplete the well, we can empty the wallet, we can use all the water in the jug and it’s empty. We won’t have more until we take a break and replace it somehow. We can switch back and forth, but at what price? What’s the cost?

There is a better way. We can, at least some times, focus fully on what we’ve got going on in front of us and similar tasks so our brain doesn’t have to keep switching. Yes, lets work on that. So we can get more done and more importantly, we can get things done without completely depleting our brain!

Recently with a client, we were discussing Batch work. She has a lot of different tasks that she needs to take care of. Don’t we all? There are things that need to be done, and the sheer quantity of tasks is overwhelming to her, AND the variety of things is also overwhelming to her. And right now, she only sees them all together. She’s not seeing them prioritized, she’s not seeing them categorized, she’s not seeing them in any of those ways. And so that means it’s even more overwhelming.

And at this moment, for a couple of reasons, she is depleted of energy and bandwidth already, and she is finding it very difficult to get things done. We worked on papers together, and recognized, too, that her papers are a representation of the tasks that need to be completed. Papers are also time management, in this case, especially. She might have a medical bill that needs to be paid, but she also needs to call the doctor and ask a question. Each piece of paper represents a couple different things for her. She was seeking a way to categorize broad categories of the papers and actions because she know multitasking wasn’t working and categories made more sense, especially at this moment.

So we talked about batch work. We talked about grouping similar papers and therefore tasks together like putting all the bills to pay in one place and then putting a date on the calendar or an appointment on the calendar for a couple hours every week to get the bills paid. Or, how she has follow-up tasks for a legal challenge that she’s got going on. And so she needs to put an appointment on the calendar every week for making calls or following up until progress is made.

Batch work can occasionally offer synergies or economies of scale. Meaning, when we group the tasks together, they end up taking far less time than they would if we did each separately. For example, reviewing the legal papers and making one call to the attorney and asking multiple questions at once saves time and money.

Having these tasks, or similar tasks, is inevitable. How do we do them better? How do we do them with less stress? How do we do it so we’re not depleted at the end? How do we set ourselves up to succeed?

Because, let’s face it, it’s possible that we switch tasks so often in a work session that we never actually accomplish or complete anything! We feel like we’re working like crazy, but nothing ever actually gets done.

Done. Done! Yeah for Done! If we are working towards Done, or Accomplished or Completed, let’s think in batches. We can do things so they’re actually all the way to done.

Conversely, we can also do batches of work in an assigned time and say, that’s good enough. We can get as done as we can for today and then move on to a different type of task. For example, I don’t get to sit and do 12 hours of money and bill paying in a day. It doesn’t usually work that way.

What is more useful to me instead is doing a batch of home maintenance tasks in the morning, like starting laundry and the dishwasher, after a batch of personal hygiene tasks like taking a shower and brushing my teeth.

I may remember, while showering, that I need to pay a bill but I will not be writing checks while I’m in the shower. We can see that is silly, but we absolutely try to do those kinds of things at the same time. So let’s not do that. Let’s do one thing, or one type of batch of things until they are done right.

The personal hygiene tasks, then I am done and ready to move on.

Then house tasks and then I am done. Then a handful of kitchen tasks like make my coffee, take my vitamins and pack my lunch. Those are all batches, and they’re obvious, so lets look at the rest of our tasks in batches as well.

Instead of switch tasking and asking more of my brain than I need to, than you need to, we can put those different tasks that we need to accomplish together in batches and just think bill paying tasks or money tasks or house management tasks.

In my company, I have four different focus areas or income streams. I will batch all my speaking engagement tasks together – following up on upcoming presentations, printing copies of my handouts, sending invoices. Then, with my calendar on my screen, I’ll batch client scheduling tasks and emails. Then I might shift to writing and content creation tasks, whatever those look like. But instead of having to switch back and forth and manage my focus like that, I can do all of those different things in a batch. I don’t have to keep switching my focus and my energy. I can save that for other things later in the day, or I can just do them with more ease. That works both ways. And I’m more likely to actually get things done with a lot less stress. And isn’t that what we’re working towards? I know it’s what I’m working towards.

Let’s recap:

Multitasking is a myth. Sorry.

Switch tasking is real and doable and can be useful, but may also use up our focus and energy and other resources faster than regular work.

If you’re tired of switch tasking and / or want to give another strategy a try, experiment with Batch work to work with your brain and help you get more done with less hassle.

Give it a try!

Advice For Life’s Next Chapter

Did you know? I have the honor and responsibility of being an elected official as a member of our local Board of Education. Evergreen Park Elementary School District 124, to be specific.

I do consider it both an honor and a responsibility. It is a decision that we make, to pursue and support education, to serve our communities. And I love it. And some day, I don’t. Most days I do.

I love that I get to serve and support 1800+ students and 300+ staff members. I get to help make our community stronger. Yes, it’s cool. I occasionally get to do cool things. And, sometimes I have to do really hard things, and sometimes I have to do things that are not cool. And all of that is ok, because, again, it is a decision we make to serve and I don’t take that lightly.

Today, though, I want to talk about a cool thing. One of the perks.

Every year, the Board Of Education members, as we distribute diplomas, shake the hands of and look in the eyes and smile at our 8th grade Central Middle School graduates as they finish their time in Evergreen Park Elementary School District 124, and move on to high school and the next stages of their lives. And it’s awesome. And for the last few years, as President, I also get to give a speech.

I get to address the families and our staff that are there, and I get this one last opportunity to speak to our students. I spend a lot of time considering what message I want to deliver to the students.

I try to write words that I hope the students remember, and, well, if they don’t, it’s recorded so they can go back and listen to it again on YouTube if they want. But as any good speaker knows, the words I say are not about me as the speaker, they are about the audience, our students. What do I hope they take with them when they go?

And, as I wrote this intro for today’s content, I am thinking ahead because I have an opportunity to address our staff before the first day of school in a few weeks. I’m already considering what exactly do I want our staff members to take with them that day, too. What do they need to hear and know as they start the school year? I want them to know how much I appreciate them, how much the BOE appreciates them, how truly amazing they are in guiding our most precious commodity, our students. And that I really do believe we have just the best staff. So I will be telling them that in five minutes or less, in a few weeks.

As I wrote the words for our students, it made my heart happy that I had one last chance to speak to them all before we parted ways. And for us today, I thought it might be fitting as we all shift into August, and perhaps are sending students back to school or we might be adjusting our schedule and thinking our next big thoughts, maybe these words are for you, too.

Good evening.

It is my absolute honor and privilege to have a few moments to address the central middle school class of 2024 this evening.

I want to say “Thank You” to all of you here for coming.  And not just coming to this graduation ceremony.  

I know all that goes in to getting to this point. 

Thank you to our teachers and staff who have instructed and guided our kids along the way. 

These students have benefited immeasurably from these dedicated, passionate educators.  

I thank every one of you for your service.  

These educators arrive early, stay late, they’re in the classrooms and hallways, at extra events on evenings and weekends, they are always available via email.  Trust me, I know. 

And they truly have our student’s best interests in mind.  We are so fortunate, and I am so grateful.

Thank you, parents.  And grandparents and aunts and uncles and all those folks who also show up. 

Every day. 

I’m not even going to finish the equation, of number of mornings multiplied by number of school years so far!  Backpacks packed, homework, gym uniforms, sport uniforms, band instruments, car pools, field trips, forms completed.  Then there are the games and concerts and events that we are seriously SO happy to attend.  Thank you, parents and loved ones.

Students – yes, tonight is about you, but some time this evening, Please stop and look your parents and grandparents and significant adults in the eyes and thank them for helping you get to this occasion.  They love you so much, trust me.

Now, I would like to address our graduates.

  • Every person here this evening is here because of you.
  • We are reflecting on where you have been, celebrating with you for where you are, and dreaming big with you for where you are going.

Students, I have four things to ask of you this evening.  

First, Do the right thing, even when no one is watching.  

Don’t bother with easy, or just skating by, because you think no one will notice.  YOU will notice.  

And once you know you can count on yourself to do the right thing, your confidence and capacity for doing the right thing will grow.  

Perhaps you’ll find yourself in a situation and you’re not sure what the right thing to do is?  Go with kindness.  Justice.  Fairness.  Thinking and thoughtfulness.  Those are always going to be the right thing.  And The Right thing might not be what everyone else is doing, but that’s ok, they are just waiting for you to set an example.

Second, Find your people.  

Look around, and see the people that are doing what you want to do, what you aspire to do.

Surround yourself with good people who will lift you up, build you up.  

Who aren’t about drama, who are also the ones doing the right thing even when no one is looking.

Find and appreciate those people, and more importantly, strive to be that best person for others.    

Next, Embrace the small and powerful word – Yet.

Three small letters, y e t.

Yet.

We may think we need to have everything figured out.  And we will.  That day will come.  But it might not be here Yet.  And that’s ok. Open your mind and your heart, and be kind to yourself as you figure things out.

Finally, Start and end with gratitude.  

Be grateful for your natural born talents and your diligently honed skills.  

Be grateful for your family who loves you, for the education you are working for, for your friends and our community.  

Imagine, remembering just one thing you’re grateful for as you start and finish your day every day. 

Imagine how great that would feel, and how much that small habit would positively impact your life.  

To Recap:

Do the Right Thing.  

Find Your People.

Embrace Yet.

And Start and End with Gratitude

I’m going to take my own advice here, and end by saying thank you, Central Middle School class of 2024. I can’t wait to see what each of you will continue to achieve in big and small ways, in the years to come.  Congratulations and Well Done!

College Bound? Organize Your Dorm and Small Spaces

(This content started out as a 90 minute in-person presentation, and what you are reading today was the handout, so many of the tips are in list form.)

First, let me remind you: At this time, your priorities might not be the same as your student’s priorities. We can’t control how others feel.  If your student, like mine, has no plans for decorating his or her space beyond the necessities, so be it.

Sending a student off to college? Or is an adult child moving to their first apartment? Enjoy this Grand New Adventure! And, get it organized!

Planning ahead makes these days flow smoothly. I said these quotes to my son and his friend just last week:

“If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!” (Ben Franklin) and
“In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.”  (Dwight D. Eisenhower)
 
So, let’s do this!

  • Get the list of recommended items from your school.
  • Virtual tours, and on-line schematics are also available for some schools.
  • Check Target, BB&B and elsewhere for lists, but DON’T buy everything on the lists!
  • Your student can ask for gift cards for graduation.  Check into stores close to campus, too.
  • At Orientation, we can determine what’s provided and have a chance to measure rooms and spaces. Refrigerators?  Microwaves?  Box fans? 
  • Collaborate with roommates, or start the search among friends or on Facebook.  Your students don’t need more than one coffee maker or popcorn maker, cleaning supplies, mirrors, etc., either. 
  • Start early to spread new expenses over a few months, and to give you all time to think and plan clearly.

You and your student can tackle organizing dorm rooms and small spaces the same way we organize for any project. We can use the 5 Step Organizing Process via Julie Morgenstern in her book Organizing From The Inside Out. Those 5 steps are Sort, Purge, Assign a Home, Containerize and Equalize.
 
The Sort and Purge steps go along with packing as your student gets ready to move.

  • Pack like with like; but also get things ready to use.
    • For example, as your student packs their bedding and towels, keep one set of bedding and towels right on top to use immediately when they get to their new space.
    • This makes making the bed so much easier.
    • And they can leave the rest of their bedding and towels packed until after they have set up their space.
  • Shop at home first for their stuff, to save $$ and make them more comfortable.
    • For example, my son and I were just discussing bed pillows this afternoon, and how he should pack his favorites from home to ensure a good nights sleep.
    • In addition, he is taking his bedspread from home because he really likes it.
    • I can replace the spread and his home pillows with items we already own.
  • It’s difficult to purge at this point, since our students are acquiring things at this stage. But they can choose to leave some things behind.

 Assign a Home / Containerize:  SHOPPING:

  • When considering storage for any spaces, dorms or home – utilize vertical space as much as possible.
    • Consider a bed-side bag for bedside items (especially if the bed is lofted).
      • Space bags / Ziploc totes and bags;
      • Consider over-the-the door towel hanger / coat rack / shoe holder / pockets:  for shoes, but also snacks and such. 
      • Double-hang the closet rods.
      • Use narrow metal / felted hangers.
  • You’re going to need at least a few surge protectors, and make sure they have long cords.
  • 3M Command hooks, cord keepers, photo hanging strips.
  • Plan for under-bed storage.
  • Consider tension rods for fabric covers / partitions (shower curtains and rings are awesome, too).
  • The 80/20 says we use 20% of our stuff 80% of the time.  So keep the 20% handy, and the 80% less handy.  
  • Consider multipurpose storage / furniture:
    • Collapsible / convertible / nesting / re-purpose-able storage; stackable, and with lids.
    • Trunks, as storage and extra seating (but don’t pack it full of heavy stuff).
    • Invest in good and matching items.  Higher quality is worth the added expense, and matching (clear, from same manufacturer) items will have the added bonus, typically, of nesting.
    • Packable bins.  Store stuff in them when you move back home for the summer.   Get them the same size so that they stack neatly when not in use
  • No matter what: When Shopping for storage items for dorms or new small spaces: Buy extra of good solutions, but be prepared with the receipt to return them if they’re not needed. 
    • There may be lots of things that come home after moving day, like boxes and suitcases.
  • Packing / Actual Move:
    • Assume that your move in / settle in time with your student will be limited.
    • Bring your own rubber mallet.
    • Right on top, have the Last In / First Out Box
      • soaps, clorox wipes, paper towels, cleaning supplies, snacks
      • tool box, Command hooks, and first aid kit, too
      • But mostly, bring your own rubber mallet for lofting the bed.
      • Bring your own hand cart, too. There are often carts and things to use, but they will be in high demand. So bring your own, as well.
  • Map out dorm room and where each box / its contents are to be unloaded.  Everyone should know the plan.
  • Set up the dressers away the same at home (like use a really big Ziploc bag to pack at home, and then empty out in the drawer at school)
  • As a parent – let me tell you now. Your student might not want help setting up their space beyond the physical labor of getting their stuff to their dorm room and lofting the bed or arranging the furniture. That is a conversation for your student and their roommate, or for them to decide on their own. Maybe they want you there, and maybe it is time to leave.

EQUALIZING (Maintenance):

  • Pack for current season, your student will likely be home before really cold weather. (But pack pants)
  • Make sure they have skills for independent living.
    • How to do laundry (and how often), how to sew a button, iron a shirt
    • First Aid and Illness kit; explain what things do – Tylenol, cold medicine, stomach distress, etc.
    • Grocery shopping, nutrition and a little cooking
    • General cleaning, how to and how often.

What to do with the bedroom that’s left behind:

  • Mourn just a little.  Then do a deep and thorough cleaning of the area.  Clothes, bedding, walls, carpets, garbage.
  • Spend just a little time on organizing during home visits, asking specific questions about specific items.
  • Do not take over your student’s space.  They will come home again, and will need their space again. 

I hope this process goes smoothly for you and your loved one!

College First-Aid Kit and Skills To Go With It

I’m writing this with two specific young adults in mind. And all of our our college students. And, well, the rest of us, too.

I had a conversation recently with a friend regarding the difference between “health and wellness” and “medical” issues. Sometime when I am working on paper management with clients, they lump articles regarding yoga with their lab results from a year ago into the same file and category. And while both are important to overall wellness, they really should be considered two different areas.

Let’s start out talking about Wellness. The best strategies for overall wellness, for all of us, are to eat well, exercise, stay hydrated and get adequate sleep.

In addition to managing their wellness, however, some college students have chronic health challenges that they also manage while in college that require daily monitoring and medication. Diabetes, ADHD, depression, anxiety and seizures are just a few. The habits around managing these challenges should be discussed and supported with your student.

Examples of physical support for chronic challenges might be a special dorm refrigerator to keep insulin refrigerated, local pharmacies or mail order pharmacies to maintain medication supplies, and providing a portable safe for the dorm room to protect medications.

Supports around habits and routines can look like timers and alarms to remind a student to take their medications, informing the university of chronic challenges, and establishing supportive parental protocols and troubleshooting solutions with your student to common problems before they head off to campus.

And, then there are minor (we hope) emergencies and illnesses that pop up for all of us, so please consider sending your student to college with a First Aid Kit. Since this might be the first time that your teen has been away from home, a good kit full of supplies is a great going back to school gift. Pack the basics, plus information on how to use the supplies and when to see someone at the campus health center.

What to Pack

First, figure out what it is you need to pack. Start with the basics for if your student has a cut, scrape or minor burn. Consider packing:

  • Adhesive bandages in all sizes.
  • Non-stick gauze – To cover larger wounds.
  • Adhesive tape – To help secure the gauze.
  • Antibiotic ointment – To prevent infections in a wound or minor burn.
  • Teach wound care basics, too: wash it, dry it, keep it dry. Alcohol stings and peroxide does not. And discuss when to seek medical attention (like if it continues to bleed, or the wound looks red and sore afterwards).

For sprains, strains and other similar injuries consider packing:

  • Elastic bandage – To wrap and provide compression for sprains and strains.
  • Ice pack – For when an injury first occurs.
  • Warm pack or heating pad – For bringing warmth and blood flow to an older injury.

When you need medication for a headache or heartburn, it’s nice to have some over-the-counter medications on hand and avoid a trip to the store. Pack:

  • Acetaminophen – Great for headaches and other aches and pains. Advise your college student not to use acetaminophen if he or she is going to be drinking alcohol. The combination of the two can cause liver damage. Alcohol and acetaminophen taken within a few hours of each other is a significant problem, but regular alcohol drinkers should avoid acetaminophen at any time.
  • Ibuprofen – Also great for headaches and particularly for pain from inflammation or swelling. Be aware that ibuprofen can be irritating to the stomach, so it’s still important for your college student to avoid alcohol when using this medication.
    • And, discuss when to use Acetaminophen and when to use Ibuprofen.
  • Antacids – With all of the new foods your teen will be experiencing, these are nice to have on hand.
  • Diphenhydramine (Benadryl) – Whether it’s an itchy bug bite or a stuffy nose from a friend’s dog, diphenhydramine is great for allergies of many kinds.
  • Other OTC allergy medication or cold medicine – some make us sleepy, some rev up our hearts. Read the instructions and be aware of what you taking.
  • Cough drops/sore throat lozenges – For minor throat pain, these can be great to soothe the irritation and scratchy feeling in the throat. (Honey has also been shown to calm a cough – but that might be messy in a first aid kit!)

Some other tools are great to have in a first aid kit. Think about packing:

  • Tweezers – From removing ticks to removing splinters, tweezers are essential in a first aid kit.
  • Thermometer – Your student might feel hot, but is it a fever? He or she won’t know without a thermometer. Get a regular oral digital thermometer, and make sure your teen knows how to use it.
  • Eye wash – If your teen gets something in his or her eye, like a chemical, dust or even irritating vapors, an eye wash is great to have on hand. Plain water can be used, but an eye wash is a nice extra. If eye wash is needed, though, a 911 call or trip to the emergency room is a good idea, or at least a follow-up visit to campus health services.

What to Pack It In

Now it is time to figure out what you will pack the supplies in. Any durable plastic box with a lid will do. Camping supply stores will often carry water-proof boxes that are used for camping. They are very sturdy and have a rubber gasket that will seal out any moisture. Because many first aid supplies can be ruined by water, these boxes are ideal. A clear box is also a good idea because it allows anyone to figure out what is in the box at a glance, in case of an emergency.

Don’t Forget a Few Extras

It is a great idea to include a card in the first aid kit that provides some basic health information about your student in the case of an emergency. Also, add the telephone numbers that your child might need. Information to include:

  • Insurance card – your student should carry this with them in their wallet all the time.
  • Telephone number for your child’s personal physician.
  • Campus health’s telephone number – When your teen has a fever, most times it isn’t practical to run home for care. Campus health has providers that specialize in college health and can manage many common illnesses.
  • Telephone number for your student’s health insurance – What doctor or specialist can your teen see when at school? Does your student need preauthorization for a medical procedure that is needed? Call the customer care telephone line and find out what the insurance will or will not cover.

College students should also have a few other things in the first aid kit or with them at school.

  • If your student has a chronic medical condition (seizures, diabetes, etc), he or she should have a medical alert bracelet or necklace. (There are even medical alert tattoos and thankfully that can’t be misplaced!)
  • Any personal medical information should be included on a card in your teen’s wallet and in the first aid box.
    • Personal medical information includes blood type, allergies to medicine, allergies to food or anything else that causes a severe reaction, physician’s name and office information, any medical conditions, medications taken on a regular basis, and emergency contact information (your name and any telephone numbers you could be reached at).

Packing up a few first aid essentials is a great gift for your teen. It’s also a reminder to always stay safe and a lesson in how to take care of problems while away from home. All that in one kit!

Packing Personality: Days Ahead or Last Minute?

There are many ways that people pack for trips or adventures or vacations. If you have ever traveled with at least one other person, you likely know there are options, and also that your ways are not necessarily other people’s ways.

Some folks pack weeks in advance, to make sure all the bases are covered. Some folks pack hours or even moments before they head out the door. Some of us are somewhere in between.

Some of us pack only the essentials and end up with just enough (we hope), and some of us like to pack extra because we like options.

Some of us pack meticulously with color coded packing cubes, check lists, shoe bags and a schedule per day. And for some, we’re lucky we have a matched pair of socks and a toothbrush.

Any of these ways can work for us, I am not here to judge as to which strategy you may choose to use.

Unless, of course, what you’re doing isn’t working for you.

I was chatting with a friend last week, and she shared that she never knew what she would find when she gets to her destination and opens her suitcase. She reports a major disconnect for her between the packing process and the actual traveling she does. Another friend says that the person who packs doesn’t always think of the person who is traveling (yet they are the same person!).

I personally use a blend of styles – there are some things that are always packed, or that I can set aside days before we leave. And there are some things that go in the suitcase in the last 5 minutes before we head out the door. That works for me.

Let’s face it, travel can sometimes be stressful. Even more troublesome is when we let the potential stress of packing and prep keep us from ever traveling or saying yes to adventures.

So, let’s explore options to make your packing work for you, regardless of your packing personality!

Let’s step a few steps back from the packing process to get started: Make sure you own the right clothes, and if you don’t, factor in shopping time. There are times when clients don’t own a swim suit or sturdy hiking shoes or an appropriate rain coat for an upcoming trip. We don’t need to ask why. But we do need to look ahead while planning, and make sure we aren’t buying a swim suit at the airport, or hiking trails in flip flops. And that takes planning. Identify the needs for your trip, check in on what you already own and fill in the gaps at least a few weeks before you leave.

Check the weather for your destination, both current and historical, for when you plan to be there. When you check the weather app today, it may be unseasonably cool / hot, so find out what is typical for your time of year at your destination. AND, still bring a rain coat and umbrella, and / or a few layering pieces for just-in-case.

Have favorites / go-to’s: For example, years ago, when working with a client, she called her typical summer outfit The Uniform. Discussing this further, she pointed out that most of the young moms and fellow nurses that she hung out with typically daily wore a neutral or solid short or skort paired with a colorful v-neck cotton t-shirt. And as we stood in her closet, both of us wearing The Uniform at that moment, I realized she was so right! What are your favorites? What is your Uniform?! Yep, pack that.

Use a packing list, if you’d like, and you can use that as a re-packing list, too, if that would help. When my kids were small, we had a little poster with pictures on it to help them pack. First, all ensembles were rolled up together because it makes life easier and takes up less space. On the poster were pictures of shorts / shirt / underwear / socks per day, with a couple of extras because things get spilled. One nice outfit for church, swim stuff, PJs, one hoodie, shoes. Guess what? This formula still works, even for grownups.

Relatedly, Pack With A Color Scheme: I was looking at a friend’s family photo taken at a Fourth of July family reunion. There were probably 50 or 60 people in the photo. Not everyone matched each other exactly, but everyone had on khaki bottoms and a red, white or blue top. Imagine for yourself what a color scheme would look like, and pack within in that color scheme so everything in your bag matches everything else. My favorite neutral is navy blue, so especially when I pack, I stick with clothes, shoes, etc., that work with navy.

Some final words about clothes – Your Clothes Are Not The Most Interesting Thing About You. I hope. Meaning, pack what you need to make your trip run smoothly, and cut yourself some slack. Similarly, remind yourself that most people you see while you are on vacation, other than the folks you are traveling with, don’t know you and will never see you again. So, to repeat, pack what you need to make your trip run smoothly, and cut yourself some slack.

Here are some of my favorite NOT- CLOTHES packing tips:

Have some things pre-packed / always packed like your toiletry bag, charger bag or cosmetics. A client asked me last week what type of travel bag I use for my cosmetics. I am not a complicated person, so the same small bag that holds my entire collection of cosmetics that lives in my medicine cabinet at home is the bag that goes with me as well, so it’s always ready to go. In addition, I always keep my travel toiletry bag stocked and ready to go. In addition, the charger bag for all of our tech is always packed and in my go-bag for work, so I just need to move it over to our travel bags when we travel.

Take everything out of your wallet and make a copy of both sides of each card, and your passport if you are traveling abroad. Leave the copies and your itinerary with your house-sitter, an adult child, a good friend or in an easy-to-find place at home, in case you have to call home for information.

Assign a home in your bags for your most important items; money, passports, car keys, cell phones and medications (e.g. always the same backpack pocket or the top left inside corner of your suitcase, etc.). You and your travel companions should know where these vital items are at all times.

If you’re traveling by car this summer, keep swimsuits and towels in a separate, ventilated and easy to reach bag, so everyone can get to the pool or lake quickly, and suits and towels have a better chance to dry fully between swims.

I hope these ideas help you out with packing for your next adventures!

Hope In Normalizing: “I Can Do This, Too”

This week, I want to introduce an idea called Normalizing, and why I think it is a useful and hopeful idea.

I was talking to a friend recently about a health challenge she is facing.

She was saying that we can believe we are all alone in what we are suffering with because we’ve never really talked about it with anyone.  However, when you start talking to people about your health issue, suddenly you find out that the problem is common, that many people have the same problem, or at least know somebody with the problem.

Ummm… let’s say gallbladder issues.  (And no, I do not have gallbladder issues, and neither does she, I’m just using this as an example).

Imagine: I’m feeling fine, and then one day, I’m not feeling so fine.  I muddle through for a few weeks or even months, with flare-ups and the like, getting better between and then another flare up happens. I finally go to the doctor. They run their tests, give me a diagnosis, share some strategies with me and also schedule a surgery because the gallbladder has to be removed.

Now that I know more and need to make plans, I mention my health challenge at work (because I need time off), or I bring it up with friends or family or the lady at the grocery store because now that I have a diagnosis and a plan, I feel more comfortable talking about it…

And when I bring it up, I find out that EVERYONE has had this problem, or knows someone who has had this problem.

You know the stories you hear, “my husband / wife / parent / child / coworker / friend / sibling has or had this problem”. We all may want to feel special and unique, but probably not when it comes to our gallbladder!

Hearing the stories about how what we thought was one-of-a-kind really isn’t… that is not a bad thing. I actually consider it kind of a good thing.  It feels hopeful to me.

In coaching, we talk about normalizing. Per Dictionary.com, Normalizing may mean “to cause (something previously considered abnormal or unacceptable) to be treated as normal”. 

This can be negative like when we learn to tolerate something that might be negative so that it becomes our new normal.  But it can also be a positive thing, when we expand our understanding of what can be typical and normal, so we no longer feel shame or worry about an issue or circumstance.

As in, when you find out that this issue that you’re having that is probably really rocking your world if you are in the middle of it and things are sore or are uncomfortable is actually 100% survivable.  And do-able.

Like when you’ve got something medical going on and all you seem to do is go to doctor’s appointments and do follow-up and it feels like a full-time job. And it’s really impacting your life and you feel frustrated. You feel like you’re alone in this. Like no one is going to understand. 

And yet, they will.

We can’t necessarily see our way through this situation because we have never been in it before.  We don’t know how long it will take, or when we may start to feel better.  But… other people know.  Other people have faced it and have come out the other side.

So we normalize. We normalize because sometimes we need to hear that we are not alone in whatever it is we’re going through. Sometimes we need to feel like we’re not alone AND that someone else in a similar situation has figured it out.

They have figured it out. And therefore, so can I.

If somebody else has figured all this out, I can too. And there is hope. There is hope in that. I can, too.

Let’s switch it up, I will use Blackberry Jam as an analogy.

Last year I learned how to make and can jam. Like preserves, hot water bath, mason jars, shelf stable, etc.

I had promised a loved one that I would find someone to make jam for an event, and I did not find a jam maker so I became the jam maker.   Here’s the thing.  I knew that I could.  I had a working knowledge of what was involved. And we have YouTube and websites and books, plus there is Amazon.com for ordering the tools.  It’s all there.  It’s all learnable. It’s all there. I knew I could do it.

I like to think I am pretty smart, and I am definitely curious and open to learning.  And hey, people living hundreds of years ago with none of the resources I have now figured it out.  I can do this.  And I did. And it was good!

Now I know how to make jam and also preserve it.  I’m pretty sure I still have some in my cabinet from last Fall. I still have all the tools and the know-how, to do it again. We can call that normalized.

Sometimes, my coaching clients or myself or any one of us, really, can think that the situation that we find ourselves in at this moment is so singular that no one has ever figured out what to do about it. And therefore, we can’t even hope to make things better.

And that’s not true.  I’m here to tell you that’s not true because I guarantee you there have been similar situations where people have figured things out and have come through on the other side just fine.

I consider normalizing to be optimistic. I consider normalizing, when done right, to be hopeful. When we are in the midst of something that we don’t know how to figure out, it’s hopeful to know that someone else figured it out. You are most likely able, you’re going to be able to figure it out as well.  And next time, you can be the resource for somebody.

We have more resources right now than we ever had ever in history to figure things out, ever. You have more resources now than anyone has ever had before. Whoa.

But it’s true. We have more knowledge now than anyone has ever had before. How hopeful and optimistic is that?! It’s awesome. And, if you want to figure things out for yourself, I am here to help. 

Independence Day: From What? For What?

This week, in this country, we celebrate Independence Day.

I want to respect why we celebrate Independence Day, and also ask the question about the word independence – for ourselves, independence from what?  What do we choose independence from, and what do we choose it for?

Whenever I hear the phrase, “The Fourth of July”, my brain goes to a silly joke. A traveler from the US goes to another country for vacation in the summer.  He asks his hosts why they don’t have The Fourth of July in their country.  The hosts assure him “of course we have The Fourth of July, right after the third and before the 5th.  The calendar would look odd without it.” Or something along those lines.

So, I’ll stick with calling it Independence Day.  But that also sends my brain down a little trail around the word “independence.”  And that’s what I want to talk about today. Independence, as in being free of something.  And free to do something else.

Is there something that you are currently dependent on, or a situation that you are currently in that you seek to be independent from? Let’s consider, is there a situation or relationship that isn’t currently working? And what would we choose instead?

Could you benefit from independence from a habit that is not supporting you? And what would we choose?

And let’s turn it into more positive language – perhaps it’s not independence from something.  But, instead something that you’d like to see improved, enhanced.   As in, if I made these positive changes, I could be independent to do x, y or z.

Whatever that looks like for you. Independence Day.

As I consider Independence, I’m reminded that sometimes we don’t even realize what we are dependent on.  It is more likely that we haven’t identified the habits or things that we need independence from, and less likely that there just aren’t any.

Perhaps it’s a mindset, a way of thinking, that isn’t serving us.

How to?

  • We start with knowing what it looks like when we’re being our best selves.
  • We Identify what is keeping us from being our best selves.
  • We break down those things, habits, ways of being that are in the way and we take action to change them. 
  • And, starting the process all over again. And that’s ok.

We can always be learning and improving.

What is it that you would need to become independent from?  And what are we using our independence for?

As both an organizational coach and a certified professional organizer, let’s use Independence from Our Stuff as an example.

Perhaps you have unhealthy habits around your stuff, and you could benefit from independence from those habits and your stuff!  I subscribe to emails from a woman named Dana White with the Website, YouTube channel etc., “A Slob Comes Clean”.  In her content she talks about her “deslobification” journey and I really respect her insight and perspective of how a disorganized person got organized.  It’s great, if you want to check her out. 

Recently, she was talking about shopping, and how her negative habits around shopping were contributing to her mounting clutter.  She mentioned that she used to go to garage sales and fill up the car all the time with more stuff because she was waiting for stuff to be the answer to her life questions.

She was creating bigger problems for herself by continuing with unhealthy habits.

To break free from the stuff, she also needed to be less dependent on the habits around acquiring more stuff.  If this was you or me in this example, we can see that we need to break free of bad habits to become independent of our clutter.

What if you need to assert your independence from negative thoughts or thinking that isn’t helping you.

Working with a coaching client the other day, we were discussing how her thoughts often get stuck in a rut, just circling or spinning, without a way to move on from that spinning (and leaving her overwhelmed, stressed out, distracted, etc.).

Can you relate?  I can relate.

This client was seeking independence from these swirling negative thoughts because she knew there was more happiness, peace and calm to be found on the other side. 

She is sometimes unhappy, overwhelmed, distracted, etc.  She is SUPER smart, accomplished professionally, has a satisfying personal life… and she still needs independence from her current thinking habits.

Again, can you relate?  I can relate.

As we worked it through. She expressed what is going on in her head. She recognized where she wants to go and how she wants to be, and she recognized she isn’t there yet. She also identified what was holding her back from happiness and peace. And getting a handle on her swirling thoughts would give her the freedom to think how she wants to think.

Anecdotally, we discovered together that writing down the thoughts that were swirling in her head would give her a chance to inspect and organize them and also make a record her learning.  So she wouldn’t have to keep thinking the same thoughts over and over again, and she could think about something else instead.  Sounds like independence to me.

I will say that for me, I have, over time, broken free of or become more independent of my perfectionist tendencies.  That way of being didn’t serve me well. I struggled with perfectionism and therefore procrastination when my kids were really little.  Time management was harder when they were little and  my responsibilities and my time were not my own. But I could change my tendencies and that is what I managed to do.

I am no longer a perfectionist because who has the time?

Was that quick? No.

Was it easy? Probably not, but I don’t remember.

Is it possible? Yes, it absolutely is. And now I can live differently. And better.

But that’s the question I’m asking you today as we celebrate Independence Day, what is it that you would like to become independent from?

What habits are no longer serving you?

What is it time for you to separate yourself from?  Thing. Habit, thought, whatever.

I look forward to hearing what that could be for you. I hope that you are, uh, motivated to think of things like that. I am thinking big thoughts this summer, but that was one that I wanted to share with.

Happy Independence Day, how ever you would like to embrace it!

Re-Entry After Travel: Bumps in the Road

Let’s call this one Re-Entry 2.0, or “Things to do your first 24 hours home!

We traveled the last week of May for a family wedding in Baltimore.

In the interest of getting the Midwest grandparents (4) to the East Coast wedding, last Fall we rented a 15 passenger van for the event. This was my husband’s idea and it was brilliant. He and I took turns driving on the 11-ish hour trip to and from Baltimore. Seriously, he is brilliant. He even downloaded to his phone the top 100 songs from 1963 as a road-trip soundtrack. Our passengers were happy.

Here is a picture of the bus, or officially, the “Bus (NotSchoolBus)”. I’m calling it a “Bus (NotSchoolBus)” because that is the category type listed for it on the Safety Compliance Certification Label, a.k.a., the door jamb label.

Here's a shot of me and my co-pilot somewhere on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.
Me and my co-pilot (my son) somewhere on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.

The wedding was beautiful and the reception was great! I am so happy for my niece and my new nephew. They are delightful people who deserve every good thing in life. I love the rest of my family, too. There were good times and great memories made. For the most part, every bit of planning yielded the expected and desired results. Lots of laughs, some Euchre (IFKYK), lots of food, adventures, ice cream, hiking and hanging out and of course the wedding!

AND there were a few snags. I will not go into details, but I will say that everyone is fine and now home. However, after two ambulance rides and ER visits, the Courtyard by Marriott Baltimore BWI may never let our family stay there again. Ever. And I don’t really blame them for that.

There were many uncertainties as we returned and some concern that we may have to adjust our travels or even travel back to Baltimore. And because of all the extra unexpected pieces, being intentional about re-entry was more important than ever. Here are suggestions to help you tackle Re-Entry and also set yourself up to succeed and even to travel again!

A cloudy and choppy day in Annapolis, MD

Unpack the car.

All the way. Yes, all the way. This is our usual practice, but it became necessary and not optional because we had to return the bus to the rental company. Everything had to come out of the bus, all luggage, all rubbish was disposed of, etc.

We also might take the car to the carwash and give it a vacuum, if we had traveled in our own car.

Unpack the bags.

All of them. YES, all of them.

You don’t want to wait and find a neglected apple or granola bar in your hiking backpack a few weeks down the road. Or dirty clothes or shoes, etc. Unpack the bags.

I was reminded of how important this step is when I found my mom’s handicap parking hangtag in one of our bags. Did I mention? My family lives in Michigan, and I live in Chicago. Thankfully I found the hangtag right away and it was out via UPS overnight delivery first thing the next morning.

Multiple loads of laundry were started and completed, and the dressier items like suits and dresses were taken to the cleaners.

Put the bags away.

Yes AWAY. All the bags. You could argue that if I was worried that I might have to travel again for an emergency, perhaps it would make sense to leave a suitcase out. And as an organizer, I will say – unless you know you have a trip planned, it never makes sense to leave a suitcase out. Working with so many clients over the years, very often I will walk into a closet or bedroom or basement storage space or garage, and one of the first things we do to make improvements is to put away the luggage that never made it back to its storage space. Such an obvious solution. Take the few extra minutes and put the bags away.

Toiletries: Re-fill and repack, order extras.

I know I have spoken about this step before, in podcasts last Spring and Summer. It was even more important that I re-filled and re-packed my supplies this week, though, in case I need to travel again soon.

Recharge stuff.

I have a power bank that lives in my travel tech bag, and I used it on our adventure. Not knowing what this week might bring, I made sure to re-charge it. I charged my portable keyboard for my IPad for the same reason. My daily habit, travel or not, is to recharge my phone, AirPods, Apple watch and IPad at night so those are good to go whenever.

Buy groceries.

We needed to restock A LOT of items when we got back from our adventures, and I knew that was a necessity even before we left. I planned a trip to Costco for our first day back and I let Costco do the cooking this week (I’m looking at you, rotisserie chicken, stuffed peppers and backed chicken alfredo). Later that day, I placed the Jewel grocery order for all the stuff I don’t buy at Costco. Within 24 hours of arriving home, the cabinets and fridge were back to normal levels.

So this next step is where the Re-Entry 2.0 comes in.

We were gone for 6 days! And it was awesome! As I described in a text today, “Weekend was mostly amazing, with just a few snags”. I can unpack, repack and re-stock. I can re-charge actual batteries.

But… I also need to re-charge metaphorical batteries.

With the few snags, I actually asked for flexibility and grace via email and texts when people needed something from me this week. I don’t usually feel the need to explain myself or excuse a delay, but this week was not a typical week for lots of reasons.

I restocked groceries, purchased prepared foods and I didn’t expect myself or anyone else to cook. I slept. I was very tired. At writing time, I still am. These last few days, I gave up trying to stay up when my brain and body said ‘enough’. I re-committed to most of my healthy habits: hydrated, returned to exercising, healthier food options, etc.. And, I set myself up to succeed in case I was called away out of town again.

Now… I just need to tackle the rest of the to-do list! But that is another episode for another day!

The Daily List Right In Front Of Me

I worked with a new client recently. It was truly a pleasure to meet and work with them. It is great to meet someone who, like many of us, is already on this journey to more intention, more productivity, to figuring out what it is they want to accomplish today and also in life. And who is ready to try different tools to help them do that.

Maybe you have the exact perfect tools to help you do exactly what you want to do, and that’s awesome. Good for you. I love that for you.

I’m there, too, but I’m also always looking for new ideas because I try them out for myself and collect those ideas and share them with all of you, my community.

I worked with two productivity coaching clients this week in their work spaces.

One client realized for themselves in the last month that a daily to-do list could help them get more done, so they are exploring a daily list. This person is a graphic designer, and they created their own visually appealing daily one-page. The list is not too structured. There were check boxes and empty lines so they could write their lists of tasks and projects and intentions and make it completely different for themselves every day, depending on what their day held.

Their process includes printing tomorrow’s form today and taking a few minutes to jot down tomorrow’s plan as they wrap up today. Doing this ahead of time means they are more likely to capture tasks they want to complete first thing in the morning, or perhaps there are timed events on the calendar already that they want to remember, like “8 am, take kids to school”, “10 am, Zoom call with potential client”, “Noon, physically create that product or buy supplies, etc.”

For this client, they also add personal stuff, like take a shower, start some laundry, stop at the grocery, make dinner. You know, the things that we have to do in life.

The other client I worked on the Daily List with is further along in her business and her productivity coaching journey. She has consistent, well established and supportive routines around most of her personal tasks, so her Daily List is specifically for business related items. Many of these items are hosted on digital to-do lists, too, or shared with her assistant, but this client really values this Daily List “in [her] face ALL THE TIME” to keep her on track. (I know she is a listener, so she’s going to know I am talking about her).

And this client and I have worked together over time. She is an established business owner and has figured out more processes and systems. Her personal tasks and routines happen consistently, so her Daily List is for items like: team management and helping the team members to thrive; strategic planning and big picture planning for the company; working with her assistant to plan the week, etc.

When I was first starting my business 21 years ago, I had a wonderful mentor who was already an established professional organizer, Pamela. She shared with me then her daily one-page planning sheet, with areas for calls to make, personal metrics like exercise and water consumption, appointments, tasks, etc. I used a similar form for many years. Now, I use digital tools and reminders, but a good list in my bullet journal – in front of my face – is sometimes what is required for me to get things done on a busy day!

What do all of these people and strategies have in common?

  • Many of us benefit from having visual and tangible reminders in front of our faces!
  • We recognize the value of carving out time today to plan for tomorrow.
  • We make sure to check in with today’s list multiple times a day to keep us on track.

I want to dive a little deeper into a few more important characteristics of the Daily List that will help you succeed.

Realistic Time Estimates.

With one of the recent clients, we discussed realistic time estimates.

I know I have spoken about realistic time estimates in other podcast episodes and articles. It is very important to identify just how long regular tasks take. For example, I believe I take quick showers in the morning. With this article on my mind this morning, I decided to actually time my shower. And if “quick showers” means 5 minutes or so… well, it turns out I DO NOT take quick showers. Or, I take two quick showers, meaning this morning’s shower was more like 10-12 minutes.

Please don’t judge.

But this is useful information. I can use it to form my plan for my day. If someone says “Let’s go do that thing” I can say that realistically, it will take me 20 -30 minutes to get ready, instead of my optimistic (and incorrect) belief that it will take me 10 minutes.

That is just one very simple example. We all have beliefs around how long we think tasks take. Or commutes. Or cooking a meal. But if we don’t factor in the rest of the steps, or if we aren’t aware of how long things really take, we are setting ourselves up to fail.

Time Cushion and Rest.

Another characteristic of a successful Daily List is factoring in rest or at least a time cushion.

I stumble on this one all the time. The Daily List needs to have extra time factored in for transition time, or nature breaks or lunch or even a moment to step outside and breathe some fresh air. There is always more work to be done, but I will get back to it happier and more refreshed if I factor in a little extra time for rest or delays or flexibility.

Identify Routine tasks.

My clients and I also talked this week about our different types of tasks from day to day.

If you like a detailed list, there are economies we can achieve with topping our list with the 5-10 tasks we need to accomplish every day to just survive, aka. our daily routine. “Take shower, brush teeth, work out, take vitamins, eat breakfast, pack lunch”. Perhaps “make bed, start laundry, walk dog”. Basics. But for some of us, we like to cross these tasks off the list, as well, just like the work specific, family specific or other responsibilities. However, we don’t likely need to rewrite them every day. We can park them at the top of the list because they are different than our daily work today.

Priorities.

And once we have figured out how to manage those routine tasks, let’s look at prioritizing the rest of the items on the Daily List.

Maybe it’s just me, but I usually have more on my list than I can possibly get done in a day.

Again, asking you not to judge, here. I know this AND it still happens. So it is very important that at the start of every day, I review the list and determine what can feasibly happen in the time I have today, and then I put the tasks in order of importance and urgency. “Launching my new website” is super important, but will take many more hours than I have today AND no one but me is waiting for that task’s completion. Following up with clients, moving more urgent projects along, taking care of tasks that other people are relying on me to complete so they can do their work – yes, those will end up at the top of today’s list, along with realistic time estimates as to how long I expect the tasks to take.

So, to recap, perhaps you would benefit from a Daily List IN FRONT OF YOU every day. Perhaps it’s paper, perhaps it is digital. You do you. But there are characteristics that will make the Daily List and the process successful:

  • Planning ahead, like the day before, to wrap up today and look at tomorrow.
  • Checking in on the Daily List regularly.
  • Realistic Time Estimates for our regular tasks.
  • Factoring in time cushion and rest.
  • Recognizing the difference between routine tasks and the rest of your Daily List.
  • Prioritized tasks, so that the most important work gets done.

Hope this helps!

“Better than Expected”.

How should I take this statement? “This was better than I expected.”

I feel like I need to talk about this. And I just have to laugh. I had two in-person clients recently who were new to me and to the organizing process. I met a new client this week who is an amazing person. My clients are so cool. I get to meet such great people. This new client is a good human being doing such good things.

I also worked with a new client last week, that particular client is the daughter of an existing client and wanted me to help her with a project.

Two different clients, two different days, two completely different projects. And they both said “This was better than I expected.”

This week’s client had questions about productivity, time management and routines. That is my jam. I love that.

Last week’s client needed in-person organizing of things. She needed help with closets and organizing, with getting her closet organized around her new job and getting ready in the morning in professional clothes. Routines, too, but mostly the physical structure around getting her clothes organized. That was awesome. Such a satisfying project.

And, as I always do, I checked in with my clients as our appointments progressed. We check in around the agenda for the day, the scope of work, their expectations and how they feel we are doing.

Each of them said “Wow, this is not what I expected at all.”

Obviously, my next question always then is,

“Okay, well, is that good or bad?” and then

“What were your expectations, that this is not what you expected?”,

Yes, I do have questions ready to ask when my clients tell me these things, because they are not the first to say it nor will they be the last. Thankfully, they said, and most do, “No, in a good way, as in ‘This is going much better than I expected.'”

Thank goodness.

They meant: it was going well, they were excited about the process and they were really happy with the work that we had accomplished.

I want to acknowledge that even though apparently they were expecting the process to be rough, they still were willing to take the leap and make the appointment. I want to appreciate that they were brave and that even though they thought it might be hard, they were still committed enough to making change and to the process that they wanted to do it anyway. That is major. They could have just not wanted to do that but they stuck with it. I really respect that they were willing to make that happen even though that apparently they thought it was going to be torture.

I would like to dispel some myths around working with a professional organizer or organizational coach.

Myth #1, I will come in and take over the plan.

I will not, I promise. I tell my organizing and coaching clients, “the agenda is your agenda”. The agenda for our appointments is created by my client with my input around what my clients want to create, what my clients want to see happen. The agenda is your agenda.

For example, let’s imagine that you call me and say, “I want to get organized. I want to organize my closets. I want to maximize the storage space in the closet that I have so that I can find the clothes that I need for getting dressed for work in the morning better.” Great. And I’m not going to come in and say, “you called me and want to work in your closet, but now that I am here, I want to organize your kitchen”.

The agenda is your agenda. Keep in mind, we can adjust the agenda if you’d like, but that is also up to you. Sometimes when we’re making good progress, you may say “I’d like to pause this project and get your opinion on these other two spaces in my house before you go.” And we can do that. But you are still creating the agenda. I’m not there to make you do anything you don’t want to do.

Myth #1.5, If you are unclear on your goals, I am going to tell you what to do.

I see this as related to the first myth, and I assure you, we can figure this out together, too.

Perhaps you know you want to get organized, but you don’t know where to start or which projects are most important, etc. And we can figure out that together, too.

Myth #2, You will be judged or shamed for any disorganization.

No, you will not. I promise you. You are awesome. You have many strengths and skills. And I am betting you are more organized than you think. Most of my clients are more organized than they realize.

And if you’re not, that’s ok, too. I am organized, and I am here to help. I’ve heard from many of my clients over the years that they have been shamed or judged for being disorganized. Hear me now, I’m not going to shame you and neither should any other organizer or coach. There is no shame, there’s no judgment. I don’t expect everyone’s space to be organized. If it were, why would you need an organizer?!

What does happen is active listening, which is not judgment. If you’re calling an organizer or a coach, you are hoping to change your situation or environment. That is not judging, that is hearing what you’re saying. And that how your situation currently is not how you want it to be. That you want it to be different, and we work together to make it different. I can help you, and I have dozens of ideas to help. I’m not going to shame you, there is no judgment. I’m not going to yell, shake my finger or turn around and walk away.

Myth #3, “I’m so overwhelmed, I don’t know where to start.”

Well, this might not be a myth, you really might be overwhelmed. But I am not. And I will help us figure out where to start.

Myth #4: “You’re going to make me get rid of everything.”

I hear this one ALL THE TIME. At organizing appointments, at presentations – ALL THE TIME.

My goal is not to make you get rid of things. That may be an outcome, but that is not the broad goal.

Very often the “getting organized” conversation requires that we change things, right? If the current situation isn’t working, then yes, we need to change.

And, at times, that means we have to purge things completely from our home. And sometimes it means our things need to go elsewhere in our home.

For example, last week when I was working with my client on her closet, I didn’t make her get rid of anything. She had already decided that a few things didn’t work for her anymore, style wise, and we set those aside to donate. But for the majority of our time together, we discussed that with the limited space she had for her current clothes, she could separate her clothes by seasons and put the wintry clothes into storage until Fall. She didn’t get rid of it, we just stored it differently.

There were also some seasonal items like Halloween costumes and Christmas pajamas, so we put those away until Fall, too. The few items that left were her idea. Sometimes purging is part of the solution and sometime it is not, and that will be up to you.

Not a Myth, #5: I understand that calling an organizer or a coach is a leap of faith. To let a stranger into your home and your life is a really big deal. I, and any good organizer or coach, is going to go to great lengths to make you comfortable. I respect your brave decision.

Not a Myth, #6: There might be homework. In coaching, there almost always is, even if it is just processing the learning we gain during our sessions. There’s no mandatory homework. There might be things that you and I agree would be really great ways to move you forward, and we can agree that you will accomplish them, for example, in the two weeks before our next appointment so that we can keep making progress. But that is agreed upon, mutually respectfully. Logically, in terms of what you want to accomplish in the timeframe in which you want to accomplish it. Back to the beginning, “the agenda is your agenda”, right?

To recap,

Whatever it is people expect to have happen, more often than not, I hear a “Wow, that went way better” or “that was more fun that I expected” or “this was the first time someone didn’t yell at me about organizing” or “we got so much done in our time together!”.

Thankfully, that’s what I get more than anything is that the session went way differently, but way better than I had expected.

Please ask questions. Let me know what your preconceived notions are so we can talk about them. If you have fears of any kind, reach out and we can talk them through. Don’t let fear of the unknown keep you from taking the leap and making your life better. Organizing and organizational coaching isn’t painful. It is work, to do and be and get better, but it will most likely go better than expected!