I organize with my kids regularly, probably more often than they would like.  I remind them that most people have to pay for my services and that they’re lucky I nag / torture / organize them for free, but I doubt they consider themselves lucky.

     I do enjoy brief shining moments after organizing when they say “wow, mom, it is more fun to play with my xxx when all the pieces are together”.  I worked with a young client (he is 9) last week, and was reminded of 8 tips for organizing with children (and adults, too!!):

1. Let them use THEIR words.  Ask your kids to verbalize the benefits of organizing.  If they can’t come up with any, brainstorm together about why they need to organize: it’s more fun to play with toys when all the parts are together, make room for something new, sell stuff to buy more, make room for a sleepover with friends, etc.  Also, use THEIR words for making container labels (and label makers are really cool).
2. Make it fun:  Play music, use a timer, make organizing a race or game.  Try “Let’s see if we can get through this pile before the timer goes off”, or “Let’s pretend we’re packing for a trip and find the 10 things you want to take” or “imagine your friend is coming over and wants to play Transformers, let’s collect all your Transformers”.
3. Break big work into smaller pieces: Large projects may need to be broken into smaller chunks, depending on your child’s age and attention.  I can give my 14 year-old a task and a time frame, and leave him to do it.  The 7 year-old requires shorter projects and more assistance.  Let’s say the project is Organize Your Bedroom.  The smaller pieces may be an hour a day: Monday – organize book shelves, Tuesday – dresser drawers, Wednesday – closet, Thursday and Friday – toys and toy box.  By the end of the week, you’ve maintained focus, you and your child are still speaking to each other and the bedroom is organized.
4. Take Breaks and Schedule your Stop-Time:  When organizing, we all need short breaks (but not too many) to grab a beverage, stretch and regain focus.  And scheduling an Stop-Time gives us all a light at the end of the organizing tunnel, and keeps the kids from losing focus or feeling resentful.       Stick to the Stop-Time even if the project is not done, and come back to it tomorrow.
5. Law of Diminishing Returns: Decision-making starts slowly, builds in speed, then slows again.  When we start organizing, we move slowly as we define our categories and their containers (like legos, pokemon cards, hex bugs, or books in different piles).  Once we establish categories and containers, we gather speed and make progress.  Then, after the important and easy sorting is done, we are left with a pile of less important, less defined items, and decision-making slows down again.  Don’t get hung up on the un-important stuff.   When you get to that final scruffy pile, put it in a paper bag with today’s date on it, and set it in the closet.  Agree that if your child doesn’t go into the bag looking for something specific within a week or two, you’ll toss it.
6. Recognize the different ways to sort:  When we started to lose focus the other day, we switched from “pulling out one item at a time and deciding where it belongs” to “look at the pile, and pull out all the books or legos or light bright pegs”.  Both ways are correct, and shifting gears helped us re-focus.
7. Embrace AWAY:  Make sure the last 10 minutes of your organizing session are spent putting things AWAY.  That is one of the most important parts of organizing with kids, and one that we often do for thm, gloss over, or don’t complete.  AWAY is a wonderful word, an important idea, and kids need to know that AWAY is the end goal.
8. Make it worth their while.  I don’t pay my kids to organize or complete everyday tasks like cleaning their room or cleaning up after meals.  However… I mentioned to a client that my boys were working on organizing projects while I was working with her, and she asked “What’s the pay-off?”  And      apparently Mom’s Happiness was not what she was suggesting.  So, call it positive reinforcement, and if there happens to be a bowl of ice cream or trip to the local park as a reward for an organizing project done well, maybe the kids will even suggest the next organizing project (a mom can dream, right?!).

Pick a project or two to tackle with your kids, and keep these 8 tips in mind!